I love my boyfriend dearly and would not want to hurt him even if i deliberately hurt my self. I was a virgin when i met him and vowed to remain so till i get married.but along the line he made me break that promise and i lost my virginity. Most of the time if i make love to him, i feel bad, not that i dont enjoy it or like it, but i feel deeply hurt within my being. i dont know if you uunderstand what am trying to convey. I fall on my knees and ask God for forgiveness. i have tried explaining to him but he get so annoyed that he refuses to talk to me or he will accuse me of getting tired of the relationship or of being involved in another relationship which is not true. At times i get so annoyed with him that i think he only needs me for sex. we have been together for 3 years now/. pls what do i do? i need your advise.
2006-06-26 03:22:57 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This is really tricky. The bottom line is if he truly loves you, he wouldn't want to do anything that causes you so much distress. However, boys are immature and horny little dogs, so since you have already given it to him, he may act like a spoiled brat when you ask to go back to waiting before marraige. It sounds like you would be better off meeting a nice boy at your church who has the same morals and ideals that you have.
2006-06-26 03:28:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand what you conscience is trying to tell you, your faith is stronger than your will to accept your fault of premarital sex, at least to the point that you feel uncomfortable crossing that line prior to being married....The issue that is important here is your faith, sure sex is a wonderful physical experience with another, especially one you care so deeply for, or at least its suppose to be that way, except for your morality is not allowing you to completely enjoy such an experience in that way...Since your faith is based on Spiritual values I feel you should repent, sustain from sexual intercourse until your married, considered this a lesson learned and regain your faith in yourself...this may sound like a ridiculous suggestion, you already having crossed that line but were talking about how this is affecting you, emotionally..spiritually and I believe its more important for you to return to the path you intended to follow. Talk to your bf, let him know the importance of such a change and perhaps his understanding will allow your relationship to progress to another level that resolves this issue all together, good luck, & blessings.
2006-06-26 10:39:32 · answer #2 · answered by Goodspeed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off he made you go against something you believed in and you have to be alright with yourself before you can fully give yourself to someone else. He is using you for sex. If he loves you as much as you love him he would have waited for you not force or make you break a promise you believed in. I think it may be time to let him go as much as that hurts. Sex is something that he uses to control you. He tries to make you feel bad by saying your interested in someone else when it's not true. Do yourself a favor get rid of him and find someone else who will respect you and your beliefs.
Good luck.
2006-06-26 10:30:19 · answer #3 · answered by Nikki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel bad that you are being so hard on yourself. We are all human.....and we WILL always make choices that we wish we would not have. I don't believe that we are judged in our life by one thing....it is who we are as a person over time. So don't feel so bad.....perhaps starting a new relationship with someone else is an option too if the pressure from your current boyfriend is to much.
2006-06-26 11:00:14 · answer #4 · answered by Jillian 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love means waiting. You know God, don't just ask for forgiveness, ask for deliverance as well. You allow your man to do what he's doing, so you are to blame as well. So from now on if you say no and he tries to make you feel guilty and you do it anyway, you need to pray for stronger self esteem also.
God can and will deliver you, you just have to be willing to accept the deliverance, even if that means letting go of what you have and waiting on God to bring to you what He has for you!
2006-06-26 10:29:39 · answer #5 · answered by ~2Sxy4u!~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmmm... Well maybe you have small communication issues, or your standars for yourself were not nearly the same as his standarsa for you... I don't think it's just a sexual relationship (believe me, you'd know if it was cause after he got what he wanted, he would have left and only called when he needed a "fix")...
2006-06-26 10:28:50 · answer #6 · answered by polar_buur 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋