Pls advise ......?

Question

my daughter 2 and a half yrs old recently i noticed that she became so nervous and she starts biting me and everyone and spitting and doing weird stuff like wants to break everything and when i say no u cant have smth in a mall she keeps screaming and crying on the floor infront of everybody she became v terrible dunno what to do..any help???

she is my first kid and actually she doesnt see kids of her age too much i used to take her to the park and the pool but the wether now is too hot where i live so i cant do this anymore....she is hyperactive but recently she turned to be a crazy baby..

Answer 1

it's called a tantrum.

She is in a phase of childhood where she is realizing her own independence. Unfortunately there are arguments for a million different ways to deal with this situation.

I think your best bet is to try to see it her way first, and then find a way to explain why she can't have something to her in her language.

1>Agree with her first. 'Yes, you should have that... but how can we get it?'
2>Ask her lots of questions. It defuses the situation if she has to think a little... 'if you took that from Sally, what would she play with?', 'if you have it, and Sally wants it, will you give it to her?'...

Talk to her as if you are on her side. She will learn to respect you more if you talk to her with her best interests in mind. Remember, we have learned all the lessons like 'if you hit someone, they hit back.' and 'dont take something without asking nicely.' but she probably hasn't learned these yet. You are her parent helping her to understand the world as her partner in learning, not as a master or as a slave.
I hope it helps a little!

Answer 2

If your child has increasingly bad behaviour then you are probably encouraging them by responding to it. Kids want attention, and they don't care if it's good or bad attention.

Ignore the bad stuff (and I really really mean IGNORE, don't punish or occasionally respond) and reward the good stuff. Don't let anyone else interfere either, as mixed messages create messed up people. Doing this can be really hard but that way your child should learn that if they want attention they have to behave. You should only intervene in the bad stuff if you cannot see a way to reward positive behaviour.

This is really basic psychological conditioning. B.F.Skinner laid out the scientific groundwork for this nearly a century ago, and clearly demonstrated that positive reinforcement has a greater and longer lasting effect than punishment. This method has been repeatedly succesful on animals, children, adults - you name it..

However, if you are unsure or suspect some other cause seek the help of a trained professional.

Answer 3

That's the problem with us "sparing the rod" these days. God doesn't say things for no reason. He said, "Spare the rod and spoil the child."

Of course there is a limit. You can't be abusive. You just need to draw the line and never EVER let it move.

There once was a child that would run away from it's parents. The parents would yell, "come back!", and the child would laugh, turn around, and run away. The parents would also laugh while they ran after the child. Yes, it was cute.

One day, they were walking down the stairs from their front porch, and the child ran ahead, heading towards the family car across the street. To get to it, the child would have to run between two parked cars. The parents saw a car coming down the street and yelled at the child, "come back!" The child laughed, turned around and ran into the street from between the two cars.

Answer 4

Thats why they call them the terrible twos!! This is normal behavior for a toddler, they now have a strong sense of self and want to see how far they can push it. Take the no nonsense approach, dont let her see you get flustered, put your foot down and show her whos the boss. Once she sees your not going to put up with this behaviour she will calm down but wont be able to help herself throwing these tantrums its a confusing world for her right now and sometimes it just gets to much. This stage will pass soon and (depending on how you handle it!) you will have a nicer child emerge at the other end.
P.s Dont worry about what passers by think when she screams in public, most of them will be looking on in sympathy having being there once themselves.

Answer 5

I think your child is hyperactive
Parents of hyperactive children know the "Would you please just settle down?!" phrase well, and likely use it on a regular basis.

There are a number of tips to help parents settle their hyperactive child down. These quick tips and relaxation techniques take the same amount of time as yelling and scolding but produce incredibly different results in hyperactive children.

Quick Calming Tips:

Try quick tips to calm a hyperactive child down during temper outbursts or unusually rowdy days. These calming tips are not novel to adults by any stretch. How many times have you heard "Take a deep breath and count to 10" or "Calgon, take me away." What works for big people works for little people as well.

Deep breathing is one of the simplest ways to calm the body. Teach your children to take deep breaths (in through the nose, out through the mouth) when they begin to feel frustrated and out of control. Parents, you do this too!
Draw a warm salt bath or bubble bath to wash away the hyperactive child's stresses of the day.
Take your hyperactive child for a walk or send them around the block on their own if they are old enough. Not only does walking burn off excess energy, the repetitive thump, thump, thump of feet hitting pavement brings the mind back into focus.
Give your hyperactive child a mini-massage. Touch is very important to Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder children. Massaging their temples, giving a shoulder rub or lightly running your fingers through their hair can calm children quickly.
Put together a "Boredom Box" that provides creative outlets for your hyperactive child. Fill this box or plastic storage bin with paint sets, coloring books, crossword puzzles, modeling clay, jewelry making kits and other artistic areas of interest. Hyperactive children bore easily and their fast spinning minds need extra stimulation. In the absence of nothing better to do, hyperactive children will lean on their own devises and you don't want them doing that. Better that they draw than set the cat on fire...
The quick-fix calming techniques work to sooth the hyperactive child after they already became too stressed or active. There are also techniques that parents can teach their hyperactive children to help them get the "stuff" out before it builds up and explodes.

Create a calming home environment:

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder children have difficulty remaining calm in a hectic environment. Clearing the clutter and taking a "less is more" approach to decorating can reduce the sensory overload on Attention Deficit and hyperactive children.

The Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder child's bedroom especially should be free of clutter. Use plastic bins to organize and store all those precious little plastic treasures (that we adults commonly refer to as "junk") and small toys. Open the curtains to provide natural lighting. Keep posters and wall hangings to a minimum. Paint the child's bedroom in calming muted colors instead of bright primary colors

Answer 6

Terrible twos ......... very common for kids that age to misbehave, and hard to control them & make them understand their inappropriate actions cuz they are too young to comprehend.

Just be as patient as you can, without resorting to physical dicipline. There are more effective punishments for real young children .......
"time outs" work for some, for others you could take away one of their favorite toys or activities so they learn that bad behavior has negative consequences. Also as your daughter gets older, you might try offering rewards when she is "good girl" for mommy. Encouraging extended periods of proper behavior by promising to give her a toy or special treat (trip to zoo or amusement park) should produce more positive results, and also avoids her from possibly associating mommy with pain of physical dicipline (spanking).

best of luck to you both

Answer 7

This is the age you need to take control and not let her do this type of behavior. If you don't do it now, you have have a child that you see on the Jerry Springer show. The main thing is to be consistant and don't give in when she throws a fit. Take control now!

Answer 8

Pay attention to her. Has anything changed in your life?? If so she may be reacting to that. Is there other children now? She may feel like she doesn't have the attention anymore. Talk with her daycare provider. She may be getting abused, sexually, verbally, physically, at daycare and she is acting out due to her frustration from there.

Answer 9

Sounds like the terrible two's if you find the correct 100% effective answer you will be very rich. Its all about trial and error, Something that works for one child will not work for another.
GOOD LUCK

Answer 10

Get some Make & break type of Games (We call it Meckeno here) for her to divert her energy in more productive things. Else leave her in a crowded baby sitting home for few hours everyday.