LADIES: Ok. My wife likes to go out. Sometimes without me which I'm cool with (even though I worrry) She says that she enjoys meeting new people and having conversations with them. How do I get her to understand that guys just don't want to "talk" and will smile and nod for hours if they think that there is a chance of getting some? I also know that she can , unintentionally, send out the wrong signals to guys. She's not dumb but had limited experience with other men before we were married. I'm just afrai she'll wind up in a bad situation..
2006-06-25 15:16:46 · 13 answers · asked by Turner 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Does she go alone? And how often does she go without you? How often do you go with her? so much more I want to know... :)
Mens intentions = getting some? If her intention is not to give some, then you probably don't have anything to worry about. UNLESS she is alone. Then it could be a problem.
I have to say that women don't usually send out the wrong signals unintentionally though. Limited experience with men or not, flirting is flirting and we know when we are doing it.
Are you really secure in the marriage that she is just having fun? If so, I wouldn't worry.
2006-06-25 15:26:39 · answer #1 · answered by girlysledgirl 3 · 12⤊ 2⤋
Not all guys are that way. I have had many good conversations with men even when they know there is no chance.
As long she doesn't go anywhere alone with these guys there is little chance she'll get into bad situations. Guys that would do that kind of stuff are unstable to begin with anyway and she could just smile at them and that is all the encouragement they need.
2006-06-25 15:29:36 · answer #2 · answered by butterflykisses427 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, how long have you guys been married? She likes to meet new people, without you along? Hmm, sounds like the beginning of couple's counseling. Why is it that you don't go out with her? Are you too tired or just not interested in going out? Maybe you should dedicate a bit more attention to your wife's needs of going out. It doesn't have to be that often but if she "likes meeting new people" um, sounds like you'll have a world of trouble very soon. And yeah, men's intentions are very obvious. Talk to your wife about your concerns and work out a plan to enjoy each others company before it's too late.
2006-06-25 15:24:42 · answer #3 · answered by MzzandtheChuchuBees 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop worrying about her. Believe in her. Chances are she already understands and appreciates the flattery. Be proud of her. Speaking with her about this may insult her intelligence.
-- But if you insist, saying it directly can be the best way: "Some guys don't really care about 'talking.' They'll smile and nod for hours if they think there's a chance of getting some. Be careful."
2006-06-25 15:22:16 · answer #4 · answered by blackasthetearsofmysoul 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i use to misunderstand this issue as well! she knows it man! when are you going to wake up and understand women's intentions. this is part of the charade that is fun for her. it's just a matter of time one of her flirtations become a reality. she plays dumb with you because it allows her to continue what she is doing. she is going this route bc she didn't have many experiences before you. this is why it is so great for her. girls know this game from age 13 and on. to think otherwise is just...wow....i cant believe that you do. But, lets just say she is ignorant of 'mens intentions.' if guys have made her comfortable enough to think that they are just enjoying great conversation, its just a matter of time until they infiltrate her niceness to make her comfortable enough to do other things. interesting talks is what stimulates attraction. this should not be done with people other than your mate or same sex friends. or formal meetings like for business. anyway, thanks for a good laugh. i love how men think they have a solid grasp on things around them. they always assume they know more when in reality women play chess with your asses!!! good luck!
2006-06-25 16:08:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can understand completely what you are saying. I was like that at one time. And I have friends that are like that.
I would suggest talking to a friend of hers (female) and let her tell your wife how men are. You can mention it to her if you have open communication and she may listen, but she may also think you are just being jealous.
Even one of your friends that you both know could talk to her about it. Her sister? brother? those are other options. Just let her know that you trust her, but want her to know how it comes across to men.
I had a guy tell me that I always leaned over on purpose so he could see down my shirt. NEVER did I even realize that he had looked down my shirt or that I had leaned down far enough for anyone to see and I dont' wear low cut shirts.
A lot of men think every thing is directed at them, even when we are oblivious to the fact that they are there. Dorks.
(show her the answers to this question!!)
2006-06-25 16:22:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am guessing she probably knows exactly what she is doing, but doesn't want you to think she does.
Suggest you go out with her to meet other people as a couple. Why is it she is going out alone?
If she is going out "with the girls", why is she going places to meet men?
It might be time to have a serious talk with her about your relationship and whether she feels content and fulfilled in it, and wha tyou both can do to increase this and strengthen your marriage. Counseling might not hurt either.
Best of luck!
2006-06-25 15:23:02 · answer #7 · answered by Pichi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sticky situation. I like the fact you realize what trolling me are REALLY all about. Sit her down and let her know how things work. What to look for and what to stay away from. Her naivete will be her downfall...we know this.
2006-06-25 15:21:00 · answer #8 · answered by rrrevils 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She knows what she is doing. Does she dress up before going out. Does she stay out late. Does she drink at all when she goes out. If yes to any question....She knows exactly what she is doing...
2006-06-25 16:30:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is an adult and you can't control her. She isn't your possession. Without trust there can be no love. Stop nagging her and trust her. Otherwise this marriage will not last.
2006-06-25 15:20:52 · answer #10 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋