2006-06-25 11:55:46 · 25 answers · asked by Debbiemouse 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
As much time as you need. Only you will know when enough is enough. Allow yourself the time, get some help if you need it.
Hang in there
2006-06-25 11:59:04 · answer #1 · answered by 'Schmod 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
It depends. Healing from an experience like that obviously takes time. However the "dumpee" should not focus on the part of the story about being left for a "younger woman" because I'm sure it wouldn't hurt any less to lose 27 years of marriage if it were a person of the same age. Pain is pain. And if it does matter a great deal to the wife that the other person is younger, then there was obviously something that the husband failed to communicate to his wife or something the wife failed to observe from her husband. In any case, my philosophy on life is this: LIVE IT! It's is hard to put pieces back together from a long established relationship but all over the world women are stronger and stronger, dealing, coping and succeeding with unfortunate things. The person should take this time to rediscover and re-invent themselves, travel, take up a hobby, smile more often, get a makeover. Do whatever makes them happy while focusing on the stability that women are supposed to have. When women take thier vows they never say anything to the notion that they will, "stop living and growing as an individual". So this person should do this to the fullest. Recovery time varies from person to person but it doesnt have to last forever.
Think of this: Since the husband doesnt seem to be sad about his leaving why should the wife be the one stuck with the brunt of the emotions? Grieve for a little bit and then Take control of it so it wont consume you.
2006-06-25 19:15:42 · answer #2 · answered by Bijou 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is one thing you will find out as you go - some days are better than others. My husband left me in April of 2004 and has been living with a woman 20 years younger than me since July of 2004 - it took them that long to find a place to live together. Our divorce should have been final by now but he is still being silly and fighting. Only the attorneys are smiling as my money keeps going into their pockets.
2006-06-25 19:07:19 · answer #3 · answered by Louise S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
54 years plus the age of the woman he left you for.......
age isn't a factor with young love and young love tends to take double the time of the length of the relationship. I am "ASSUMING" that there is no difference between young love and mature love when it comes to being dumped. 27 times 2 equals 54, but for a younger woman, that has an added kick of an insult, add her age to it. That might sound mean or cruel, but logically intellectualize it. But honestly speaking, if you get into a habit of being overly intellectual, you will greatly decrease the time, pure logic has no time for emotions
2006-06-25 19:10:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG, that's awful. I'm sorry. What an a$$.
Well the formula is - one month for every year you been together, meaning 27 months, so a little over 2 years. Being that he is a bastard, it might be easier to get over him.
2006-06-25 19:00:34 · answer #5 · answered by brand_new_monkey 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think only you can decide how long it will take. It hurts right now so you need to give yourself some time.
It's silly, but I use John Locke's rule of 5, from Lost. When I feel sorry for myself or I'm afraid, I give myself 5 seconds to feel whatever pity or fear and then I pick myself up by my boot straps and carry on.
2006-06-25 19:33:27 · answer #6 · answered by Joa5 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some women never get over it.
The answer to that question is completely up to you. You can either harbor resentment and bitterness for the rest of your life or you can let it go.
You don't have to forgive him for betraying his oath, but you must move on. If you do not, the rest of your life will be as miserable as it is right now. Is that what you want?
The short answer is: It takes as long as you choose to allow it to govern your life.
2006-06-25 19:00:24 · answer #7 · answered by Dustin Lochart 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how you choose to react to it.
If you want to dwell on it and rant and rave and rail, then yeah, it'll pretty much ruin you for the rest of your life.
If you want to take this opportunity to completely start your life over, then it'll be the best thing that ever happened to you.
Surely there are things you wanted to do while you were married that you couldn't do because you were married (go back to school, move to another state, etc). Now's your chance!
Get better, not bitter!
2006-06-25 19:47:36 · answer #8 · answered by wvbluebell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you let it take. The moment you find a new bf, and think about him, instead of about the dumping husband, the sooner you'll be over it!
2006-06-25 19:05:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
approximately 1 hour,
10 min drive to local gas station,
3 to fill a can of gas,
10 to drive home,
36minutes to dump all his old crap on the lawn,
57 seconds to get a match to light,
2 to 3 seconds for full ignition of flame
Your reaction : priceless
2006-06-25 19:01:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ouch! sorry to hear that. I don't know what your beliefs are but I, myself would pray...a lot! Join in some type of groups, try to get out of the house as much as possible.
And as funny as it sound, and as tempting as it may be. I really wouldn't suggest cutting off any type of body part.
2006-06-25 19:01:16 · answer #11 · answered by justwondering 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋