I don't know if i'm a lesbian or not?

Question

I've been in a relationship for 4 yrs now with my current boyfriend, he's good to me and it's like he is my BESTFRIEND in the world! We do everything together..... But i wanna be with a girl. I think? I wanna have baby with him and get marryed and have the love that he gives me but... i really want the affections of a female too and he said i can't have both because if i go out with another girl he can too, which i think is not fair, but he said he is not bi or gay so that why he would have to go with another chick if I messed with a female because he is not going to mess with a guy lol.. da.. but i really dont know if i wanna be with him or if its just that i want the idea of a normal life because i can't think about guys the way i think about females can some one help me?

And i been with about 4 females and was with a female for a year

Answer 1

Have you ever been with a female before? I don't think you're a lesbian because you have admitted that you want to marry your boyfriend and have children with him. I think you're just curious about being with a woman. If it's only for the sexual aspect of it, why not let your boyfriend watch? That should please all parties involved. :O)

Answer 2

To me it sounds as if you are bi which there is nothing wrong with. Does it make you mad to think of your guy with another girl? I can understand his point sex is sex. There is options, If u are are willing to try a threesome, him watching u and another girl, u just having the fanasties, or u actually trying it, if the hunger for another girl gets so strong that u just have to try it and it is pushing your guy away then maybe u should seperate and find out, but if the urge is not that strong then don't loose a good guy just let it be your fansty in your head or when you have alone time you can masterbate or if he is willing watch lesbian porn. Spice up the sex life he has fansties just like u do gurl trust me on this one, he might say he don't but he does. Anyways sweetie I wish u the best and I hope I have helped u in some way.

Answer 3

Interesting. I was in a relationship once where my g/f had been with a few women in the past which didnt bother me until she asked me if she could sleep with one of them again but I couldnt be involved. My response was the same as your boyfriends. There is nothing wrong with you having sexual feelings for another woman yet to him he probably feels inadequate and betrayed. This is what broke us apart (even though she didnt sleep with her) and I can see the same thing happening to you guys too if you do. To make a long story short, think long and hard about what you REALLY want and decide then. In my humble opinion, if youre not sure whether you are a lesbian or not, you probably are. Either way I wish you the best...

Answer 4

If you're not attracted to men, you're not attracted to men, it's that simple. Just because you want a "normal" life shouldn't mean you should leave your self unhappy sexually. Many lesbian couples are able to have happy normal lives. You can adopt, you can make a lifelong commitment to each other, and it's getting more and more accepted every day.

It's not fair to ask your boyfriend to put up with your exploration of your sexuality. Whether it's with a girl or a guy, cheating isn't ok. And you shouldn't expect him to let you mess around unless you both agree to an open relationship.

Maybe it's time for you to let him go and explore this other side of yourself.

Answer 5

well i think the important part here is that you have a bf now. if you want to be with another woman that is no different then him wanting to be with another woman. how would that make you feel?
if you are in a relationship, to deviate from your partner against his wishes is wrong just like any other female would agree that a guy messing with another girl is cheating and wrong. some guys are cool with their girl being with another girl. some aren't. you have a guy who cares for you and doesn't want to share you.

if you know you want females and not your bf you have to let him know and have the courage to leave him and face the consequenes. you can't keep him hanging around as your security just in case this "bi" thing doesn't work out. that's not fair for either of you.

just my opinion

Answer 6

i understand everything your saying ,im there now.same problem in having.your not gay your bi-courious an that when you think of a womens touch an you think of the oral sex! thats when i becomes a problem you wont your man but you also wont the sex part from a female.my boyfriend told me i could do it but if i have sex with a female that she would have to be with use both.i told him hell no.i did it anyway about a week ago an it was great everything i dreamed.THE BEST you here me.but now im she wont stop calling .an i dont wont him to find out .

Answer 7

It sound like you are looking for a man that is going to treat you better. That is going to give you the kind of Attn that a girlfriend would. It sounds more to me like... This is not the man for you. If he dose not treat you the way that you want to be treated then.... And if it is really something you feel you must do he should be will to try to come up with a happy med.

Answer 8

You sure sound confused and I am to.You want him,marriage,babies and a female.I would say you need to make up your mind what you really want because if I were him I would give you the same answer.I also would be concerned that if you choose him and baby you may end up with a lady.Then all your lives would be a mess.

Answer 9

Maby it's becasue you don't understand what love really is and your lookin to fill the void with a man and then with lesbian sex but you will never arrive to true total fulfillment because it's a deeper need. Ask yourself this question.. What is your relationship with your father?

Answer 10

You might want to consider happily fitting in as bi-sexual...
Things could be alot worse and if you think about it you got the best of both worlds...your cool, don't trip.