Two men have been sitting out on a lake all day long, ice fishing. One has been having no luck at all and the other has been pulling fish after fish out of his hole in the ice. The man having no luck finally leans over and asks the other what his secrect is.
"mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm."
"I'm sorry, what did you say?"
"mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm."
"I'm sorry, I still didn't undersftand you."
The successful man spits something into his hand. "You've got to keep your worms warm."
2006-06-25 10:03:30 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Three men want to marry the king's most beautiful daughter. The king agrees to give them a chance, but they must perform three difficult tasks: defeat an ogre, turn lead to gold, and screw a cow. The first man dies fighting the ogre, the second fails at turning lead to gold, but the third man successfully completes all three tasks.
"Congratulations!" says the king. "You may now have my daughter's hand in marriage."
"Screw that," says the man. "I want the cow."
2006-06-25 10:03:55 · update #1
hohoho... hahaha
2006-06-25 10:07:50 · answer #1 · answered by iamigloo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I actually know fishermen who do just that with worms: try this one:
The man went into the butchers and asked for a large rump steak ‘with tons of fat on the outside’. ‘That’s very unhealthy’ said the butcher ‘you’ll get a heart attack’. ‘Never’ said the man ‘I’m as fit as a fiddle, not an ounce of fat on me’. As the butcher looked at him, the man added ‘Go on, then, guess my age’. ’36 or 37’ answered the butcher. ‘I’m 59’ said the man proudly. In any event, he got the steak and left. A few minutes later, as he stood at a bus-stop, an old lady came up. ‘How old do you think I am’ she asked the man. He looked at her then said ‘About seventy, I’d guess’. ‘I’m seventy-eight’ she croaked. ‘Wonderful, just wonderful’ answered the man, then as an afterthought ‘And how old do you think I am’ he asked. ‘I’ll tell you’ she replied, ‘but first let me put my hand down the front of your trousers’. As there was no one around, the man obliged. After three or four minutes he asked ‘Come on then, tell me my age’. ‘You’re fifty-nine’ she croaked. ‘Very good’, the man said in astonishment ‘but how did you guess’. ‘I was standing behind you in the butchers’ she proudly answered.
2006-06-25 17:11:45 · answer #2 · answered by thomasrobinsonantonio 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont get the first one but the second one is good hahahahahaha
2006-06-25 17:43:21 · answer #3 · answered by 100%IrishXOX 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
did not get the first one but the second was pretty funny.
2006-06-25 17:07:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thomas Robins has you beat...sorry!
2006-06-25 18:57:30 · answer #5 · answered by Sammyleggs222 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good, but u can make some improvements. =)
2006-06-25 17:28:53 · answer #6 · answered by Lord of Luster 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ummm okay
2006-06-25 17:06:51 · answer #7 · answered by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋