2006-06-25 08:59:58 · 17 answers · asked by aeichel18 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I am so sorry for your situation but I have some suggestions for you. First, for the health and protection of your baby and yourself, you must get a grip. I know it's easier said than done, but you have a new life inside you and that takes presidence over any other emotions and feelings for now. When you were without child, it was ok to be selfish to a point, but now - it's all about your baby. Not about the father. Not now. It doesn't matter that he's left you. He also left his child. So, you have some work to do. Take care of you. And your baby. Make sure you are getting proper prenatal care. Ask you doctor for referrals for counselors that you might be able to talk to. I hope you have family and friends who are supportive at this point. Let them help you. It's okay to be emotional, but don't drown in it. You should contact your local family courts and/or secure an attorney or legal aid rep if you can't afford one. That's what they are there for. They can help you with the documentation you will need to ensure that you have proper paternity tests done and establish child support. You must do this for the child's sake. You don't mention if you have employment or if you're in school - but don't stop whatever you are doing to help yourself. If you must accept some assistance - do so until you can get on your feet. But don't depend upon them either - you are capable of handling this but you must think smart. Keep in mind, your child is a gift from God and you have been assigned as his/her mother and now you have to take the reins and mount that horse and ride it until you see clear blue skies. (accept your situation and do the best you can with what you have) Later for him. I'm sure when he thinks about it - he'll come back. And even if he does not, you must be strong. Seek the support systems that are available to you and eat well, rest well and take care of yourself and your baby. My prayers and blessings are with you through this time.
2006-06-25 09:11:39 · answer #1 · answered by THE SINGER 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you financially able to take care of yourself and the baby? Very basic issue. Babies cost lots of money. Do you have a job? Do you go to your scheduled doctor checkups? Have you decided what you will do with your life now that you will have a child to take care of?
In other words, your baby's dad is the least of your worries. Were you married? If so, you can ask for child support. If you're not married and you still know where he is, you can go to a good lawyer and ask (again) for child support. If he wasn't treating you right (abuse of any kind, etc.) then forget about him and find a safe place for you and your baby to live. If he dumped you because of the baby, then you should forget about him.
Try to do the best for you and your baby. Without knowing any specifics, that sounds like a crappy boyfriend and father to me. Work hard, take care. Take comfort in your family (parents, siblings, etc.) if possible.
2006-06-25 09:15:24 · answer #2 · answered by Ellie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try counting your blessings, like the fact that YOU will be the recipient of all your baby's smiles, hugs, and (eventually) messy school projects. He, on the other hand, will miss out on SO MUCH cuteness, so much love, and so many wonderful things that come with being a parent. My own father split just after I was born, and now he's old and full of regrets that he missed stuff with me.
It may be hard not having him around, but being a parent isn't easy in the best situations... do the best you can, and enjoy every minute with your little one.
CONGRATULATIONS!
2006-06-25 10:02:31 · answer #3 · answered by craftladyteresa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
for starters you can just ignor ignorant pepole like billS.im sorry to here about that i can only imagine how painful that must be for you but now you have a whole new person to think about just keep your mind on that precious little baby.and when you start to get down on his father leaveing you just think about that baby and the new life you will shre together that baby has unconditinal love for you .and i know he/she will more then fill that void but maybe after the baby is born he will come around .my first child his father threstned to leave me and said that the baby was not his and made me missrable sometimes i wished he would leave but after he saw the baby he changed his tone real fast.and if not then knnow that everything happens for a reason and one day you will meet a guy that will love both you and your baby.good luck and keep your head high!
2006-06-25 09:24:09 · answer #4 · answered by sar sar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was the same way. My sons dad left when I was 2 months along. Nothing will make you stop thinking about him. Nothing but time. Like I have been told a million times, it fades with time.
2006-06-25 15:38:25 · answer #5 · answered by samkat1972 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. Just pray,and work on bettering yourself. If you look good and you feel good he'll come back. Especially when u lookin good again and everybodys trying to talk to you. Other than that,busy your self with work,school,and taking care of the baby. Start something new,and start seeing someone new when your ready.
2006-06-25 09:04:22 · answer #6 · answered by LaLa N 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about how you should find a man who loves and respects you and won't leave because of a pregnancy. And DON'T get back together with the guy you're thinking about. He's a jerk for leaving you.
2006-06-25 09:20:10 · answer #7 · answered by Rach 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't waste your time, you have enough to think about> Why are you seeking to torture yourself?
Just make sure that you are getting the $$$$ for the baby.
2006-06-25 09:04:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start thinking more of yourself as a person so you won't want a dead-beat dad as your man anymore.
2006-06-25 09:05:28 · answer #9 · answered by Megs0611 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Place a rubber band around your wrist, everytime you think of him, snap it on the palm side.
2006-06-29 12:28:16 · answer #10 · answered by tbear 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋