In the instuctions for a chain saw it says "Do not stop moving blade by hand"
A packet of peanuts with "Warning contains nuts"
On a food packet "Warning contents may be hot after heating"
On CHILDRENS medicine. Do not drive or operate heavey machinery after taking this medicine
Outside a top floor resturant
"In a hurry? Why not have a coffee and roll downstairs"
2006-06-24 23:53:00 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I once received an invitation to a wedding. After the basic information (where it was, what time it was, etc., and of course the name of the bride and groom) it read roughly like this: "Please confirm if you received this invitation, so we don't worry. And also let us know if you haven't received it, so we send it again". This was, I insist IN the invitation itself.
On another occasion, I visited some friends. I rang the bell, and from inside they answered through an entry-phone: "Where are you?". Of course, entry-phones are always fixed at the same place: at the entry to the house.
When I was 2 years old the lights failed, and I accidentally drank a glass of wine my father was drinking, thinking it was water, since it was dark and I couldn't see. Just in case, considering how young I was, my mum called a hospital, and said: "My two-year-old's drunk a glass of wine?" And the receptionist, not a doctor, replied: "He's two, and he drank a whole glass of wine? Isn't he too young?"
Another time, my father was on a car with a friend. This friend was driving. It was late afternoon, but the sun was still strong, and hitting them in the face. And at some point, they got lost. So this friend said: "Where's the north here?" Note: Everybody knows that if you're going towards a setting sun you're going west. So the north MUST be on your right.
2006-06-27 14:37:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I saw a sign in a concrete car park saying "do not sit on the grass" - what grass? Or on medicine i have seen "eat with or without food". On the bottom of a cake box, "do not turn upside down". On Ice Cream "Best served Frozen" (and on bag of ice cubes too).Also, read about instructions for a chain saw that said "Do not try to stop chain with hand or genitals"
But what did puzzle me was when i brought some new shoes for work and they broke in a bout 3 days. I took them back and the sales guy asked if i had been wearing them! Obvisouly said yes, what else am i supposed to do with them? And he said they are not meant to be worn all the time or outside! So what exactly was the point of them?
2006-06-24 23:59:16 · answer #2 · answered by willowbee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Peanut butter always says: Warning Contains Nuts, and I have also seen this on packets of nuts, nut roast etc.
On a children's Superman costume: This cape will not enable you to fly.
Above a rubbish bin: Refuse to be put in this bin (hope you get the pun!)
2006-06-28 02:12:43 · answer #3 · answered by claude 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Disposable lighters have a sticker on warning you not to expose them to HEAT!
Might as well just dispose of it instantly then!
I saw this sign (it completely cracked me up) "Dyslexia Meeting"
Nobody else could see why I was laughing so much.........
On the subject of stupid things - why is dyslexia such a difficult word to spell? Isn't that just taking the p*ss?
Same as 'lisp' having an 's' in it I suppose! And 'stutter' and 'stammer' both having two syllables and beginning with letters that sufferers stur stur stur struggle with!
2006-06-29 01:38:15 · answer #4 · answered by franja 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guidelines on how to operate an iron -
"Do not Iron clothes whilst still on body."
Notice on a packet of aspirin -
"Do not take if you are allergic to aspirin or any of the other ingredients."
On cough medicine for kids- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery whilst taking this medicine."
Dear God...!
2006-06-25 00:57:10 · answer #5 · answered by badgerbadger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My personal favorite is the one on the cardboard windshield shade that says: "Warning, remove this shade before driving".
Oh, yeah, and the warning on gas grills that says "Don't check for gas leaks with a lit match"
Let's face it. Some people are too stupid to live.
-Dio
2006-06-24 23:59:48 · answer #6 · answered by diogenese19348 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A sign in Essex pointing the way to the "Secret Underground Bunker".
2006-06-25 00:21:45 · answer #7 · answered by dogfishperson 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best one i ever saw was in a little village near Sligo. It read:
"Lost cat, husband black and white can pick up" And f that wasn't enough ... No phone number or address in case we found either the cat or the husband!!!
2006-06-29 03:32:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the fruit/veg section of the supermarket - small packets of apples, carrots, etc "FUN SIZE" - I've yet to see anyone laughing.
2006-06-25 00:44:06 · answer #9 · answered by Only Asking 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Baby Changing Room. `Excuse me, this baby keeps crying, may I have another one?`
Family Butcher (in England) - might as well kill the lot I suppose!
2006-06-25 04:04:22 · answer #10 · answered by Goosey-Anne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋