Why do people seem less courteous on the East Coast?

Question

I'm asking just out of curiousity....not judging...just want to know if others notice it too.

I haven't been to every state in the U.S. ....only up and down the East Coast, TN, NV, TX, AZ, HI, MI, OH, and WV.

I live in Northern Maryland, but have lived in HI, NC, and also just outside of DC. Sometimes people are very rude here. I notice it other areas too in the North East, namely NY, NJ, CT, and MA. DC seems bad too, and VA is getting there.

From my own experience..I think TN has the most polite, laid back, friendly people. And in the other states, at least people had common courtesy and seemed much more friendly.

I know I am making large generalizations, and I'd like to think the people here at the individual level really are good people.

Personally, I think it's related to the congestion....but do others in the area notice the same thing? What do you think causes it? Do think things will ever change, or that this behavior towards others will keep spreading?

Thanks for all the replys...it's interesting to me...

Brigid...I've never heard that term before "New England Reserve," but it's a good definition.

When I was living in Hawaii, I had to get used to making eye contact with people, smiling, and saying Hi! When I returned to MD...I had to get used to looking away from people again when passing them on the street...it's so bizaar!!!

Answer 1

It's a funny thing, but you are absolutely correect in this. I was born and raised in New Hampshire and moved to Arizona when I was 22. Growing up in NH we had a lot of tourists go through our town, to the point where I had a T shirt, on the back of which was printed, "I live here, I am not a tourist, and I DONT answer questions". When my ex and I got here to Arizona, we were moving our stuff into an apartment, on a Wednesday I believe, middle of the day, hot as anything, and I had no less than 10 people ask me if I wanted some help moving the stuff inside. I was flabbergasted, I had NEVER heard of such a thing before! I though seriously they were trying to rob me! I refused their help, none too politely- I was in total culture shock (LOL). I finally realized they were sincerely wanting to help and came to the conclusion it's just too durn hot here to be a jerk.

Now I've been here for many, many years and I've noticed even people here are getting more irritated and obnoxious. But I also noticed on a recent NH visit the people THERE seem to be getting ore friendly!

So now I conclude, it's MY attitude that's changed, not theirs. People tend to respond in whatever way you approach them. If you're angry, they'll respond angrily. If you're charming, that's typically what you get in return.

Answer 2

The rudeness that you see in many east coast cities is not the natives of the area. The rudeness comes from the foreigners (not just from other countries, but other states in the U.S., too). For example, New York City is known to be one of the least courteous cities. New Yorkers have a reputation for being very reserved and sometimes outright rude. But New York is one of the biggest mixing bowls in the States. Find a native New Yorker, and you'll see a completely different story. The natives are friendly, and if they have the time, they'll help you in any way they can.

I think the other reason East Coast people seem so discourteous is because of the traffic. New York City, Washington D.C. and Hampton Roads have some of the WORST traffic jams I have ever seen. There are a lot of aggressive drivers on the East Coast, because they feel they have to be aggressive to get anywhere in the horribly congested areas and through the traffic from construction and accidents, not to mention the rubbernecking.

In my opinion, though Tennesse does have some very great people (having lived 2 hours out of Memphis for several years), some of the friendliest, most polite people are deep in the heart of Texas. I lived in south Texas, just north of Corpus Christi, for eight years, and the people there were always polite, always friendly. An example of this is the way we drove down there. People waved to each other as they passed, even to strangers. Crosswalks? Texans stop at every single one, even if there isn't a person at the crosswalk. No running red lights, and no rubbernecking, unless you plan to stop and help. The one driving problem Texans have is the rolling stop.

Yes, East Coast people can seem downright rude and mean, but I think most of that is the way the area just seems to call to all the rudest, meanest, most idiotic people in the States and around the world, and tell them 'Come see! We want more rude, mean, stupid people, and you're perfect!'

Answer 3

I think it is related to having so many cultures mixed together in large urban areas. Different cultures have different standards of what is acceptable behaviour. Unfortunately, there is no one teaching people what is acceptable in American culture to people who come to the US.
New Yorkers are infamously abrupt but I don't find them to be unfriendly. In fact, most will stop to help if someone is in dire need and most New Yorkers, real New Yorkers are thrilled to demonstrate their knowledge of the city if you ask them for directions.
I have visited Memphis, TN however, and I will agree that people there are exceptionally polite, perhaps the most polite of any place I've ever been and I've commented on it to others before also. I have also found this to be true in other parts of the south though so it may have something to do with the cultural aspects of living in that part of the country.

Answer 4

In Massachusetts, we are all very high strung. Mostly because there is a Dunkin Donuts on every corner, no matter where you go. We live a fast paced life. We don't mean to be rude, but we are certainly NOT laid back.

I went to the South last year and I almost had a breakdown. The pace was waaaaay too slow for me.

Answer 5

I have lived in New England all my life and what you are describing is referred to as "New England Reserve." When I visited in the midwest and the west, I was amazed at how much friendlier and open people were with each other. However, New England Reserve is so familiar to me that it's In my blood. No wonder people from Tennessee come up here and hate it.

Answer 6

everything is faster on The East Coast

Answer 7

Perhaps you should move to the midwest? We have lots of open spaces and really nice cities.

Answer 8

i think they're less couteous all over now.