Not all people are affectionate people; I maybe got 2 hugs from my grandmother in her lifetime, yet I know she loved me very much. The big question here is, how do YOU get along with them? That could be the key.
2006-06-24 04:46:11
·
answer #1
·
answered by Anonymous
·
0⤊
0⤋
It's not a matter of being wrong but you can't expect someone to feel something you think they should feel. It would be nice for you to see the affection from your husband's family towards your son but if it doesn't happen it would be beneficial for you to accept the fact that his family is different than your family. It doesn't mean your husband's family loves him any less. After all you had your child to express the love you and your husband have for each other. You did not have this child in hopes that the love the both of you feel would be felt and expressed by others in the way you wish it could be by your extended family. The most important love and affection comes from you and your husband.
2006-06-24 05:18:23
·
answer #2
·
answered by mia 5
·
0⤊
0⤋
hello,its not wrong to expect it but you should understand that some people are not comfortable about talking to and cuddling a 4 month old .
They may feel very self-conscious( especially men .,its culturally not done in western society even as family )especially in the light of all the media coverage of paedophilia.
Its not about you- its about them.
Its your baby and no-one will feel as affectionate as you towards your son and why would they ?.They don't know this little person yet !
When he grows and is a character in his own right then I
am sure they will be more responsive .
Try not to judge people by your own expectations and you wont be disappointed. They are not showing active dislike are they?
You are the one and the baby's daddy who should be most affectionate .He won't miss out by not having anyone hug or kiss him at 4 months !
take care ,love your baby and dont stress about what you cant control.
2006-06-24 05:03:18
·
answer #3
·
answered by gadriel 3
·
0⤊
0⤋
I come from a family that doesn't show affection. I couldn't tell you the last time I hugged my mom or grandmother as I left but there is never a doubt that they have always loved me. On the other hand my wifes family is very very affectionate. And I can tell that even after 9 years of marriage when my mother-in-law tries to gives me a kiss on the cheeck as we leave I still fill very uncomfortable. Hope this helps.
2006-06-24 04:58:39
·
answer #4
·
answered by Anonymous
·
0⤊
0⤋
It just feels terrible my mum has two grandchilden favourites which I just can't talk to her about because she tells me i'm being stupid if I say anything about one she cracks up and one of them is my son !!!
My other 2 children get critized and moaned about while my eldest son is bought loads and treated far better .
I just told you all this to show I do kind of understand what you are going through as the kids other grandmother treats them all the same .
Maybe your husbands family aren't an affectionate family I know I feel my mother and father aren't except when they see the two favourites .but i don't know how your in laws treat others this is an issue your husband should address.
At the end of the day your son gets love from you and your husband and thats what really counts .
But I do understand totally its a baby and family why can't they just be nice and show some care.
2006-06-24 04:55:51
·
answer #5
·
answered by Nutty Girl 7
·
0⤊
0⤋
Sometimes (actually quite often), it's hard for people, including family, to show affection to a baby because they are afraid of holding the baby. They are afraid they will hurt them somehow because they are so little. I have 2 sons (3 yrs and 15 months) and both sides of the family adore them. However, the moms of the families were the only ones who would hold them as babies because they were the only ones who felt comfortable enough to hold a baby. Even the dads (excluding the actual dad of the baby) wouldn't hold the new babies. My brother, who is an incredible uncle, even admitted that he doesn't like to hold babies because he is afraid he will hurt them in some way. He thinks they are too fragile. My 15 mo. is actually the last (so far) of 7 grandkids, and this has happened with every one of the kids. So what you are experiencing with your husband's family will get better as your baby gets older, and they feel more comfortable around a baby. It will be especially fun when he starts to walk and talk. Every time you are around them, make sure you tell them all the fun and wonderful things your baby is doing as he develops (i.e. smiling, laughing, blowing raspberries, eating, rolling over, etc). This helps to endear him to them even without them holding him. It will get better.
2006-06-24 05:04:25
·
answer #6
·
answered by my three boys 2
·
0⤊
0⤋
I am a little confused.
You are asking about your husbands family yet you refer to the child as YOURS! Am I then right in thinking that the baby doesn't belong to your husband too??
All famililes are different. They may not be able to show effection in the same way yours do but that doesn't mean they love your child any less.
As hard as it may seem, not everyone likes new born babies. yeah they are cute to look at but they don't really do much do they!Wait until the baby is a little bit older and able to return some of the effection. I am sure things will turn around a bit then!
2006-06-24 04:52:34
·
answer #7
·
answered by Gillipoos 5
·
0⤊
0⤋
well im sure it would be a bit hard for his family to accept him (the boy is not ur husbands...right?) but well they should at least have some respect towards the fact that he is the son of the woman someone in their family has decided to marry. If he didnt have a problem with it why should they.
2006-06-24 04:51:46
·
answer #8
·
answered by sweetness_n_passion 2
·
0⤊
0⤋
No it's not wrong. But you need to accept that for whatever reason they don't like or accept your son, they are allowed to have their own opinion. It may be a trickle down from their relationship with you that may have them holding back on loving your son.
I am due to deliver a baby boy in september. He is my bf's first son and his parents first grandson. However, my bf has a 4-yr old girl with someone else. They hate me and do not accept my son. But I live with the knowledge that this baby is MY joy and who cannot appreciate him , TOO BAD!!!.
Try to understand why and if you can change it, do so. If not don't tear yourself up about it, give that baby all YOUR love and attention and he will not suffer.
2006-06-24 04:50:46
·
answer #9
·
answered by stacy 4
·
0⤊
0⤋
Congratulations! I can understand why you feel that your husbands family isn't so loving toward your son but maybe they are the type of family that don't express their feelings on the outside.
Are they warm and friendly types of people? When they first met you how did they welcome you into the family? Don't be concerned about how they respond to your child. Just make sure they are kind to him and that he knows you and your husband love him.
2006-06-24 04:51:05
·
answer #10
·
answered by May 1
·
0⤊
0⤋