Been with boyfriend for 8 years. Had first baby in Feb this year. Both been married before. Is it just a piece of paper after all. Neither of us religious. Get married for the childs sake?
2006-06-24 02:53:14 · 21 answers · asked by Space dust 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
If you are happy, stick with it... Marriage is nothing more than a piece of paper... And there isn't the stigma there used to be...
Don't stress yourself...
2006-06-24 03:01:17 · answer #1 · answered by Forlorn Hope 7 · 5⤊ 1⤋
Marriage is a commitment, not just a piece of paper. When you live together and you are not married you always have in the back of your mind: "Oh I can leave and it won't hurt anything, I mean it's not like we're married."
But now you have a child. You have produced one of the best things that you will ever do in your life (unless your are a Michaelangelo or a Da'Vinci) and you should support and raise this wonder in the best way possible. Marriage is the institution that society has come up with for this. It is the main purpose of marriage.
If he doesn't want to marry you now, he never will, and I think I would move on. There are lots of guys who are the marrying type out there. Good luck.
2006-06-24 09:57:46 · answer #2 · answered by BigChuckles44 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should only get married if you really want to. You are not going to do the child any good if you two are miserable at being married to each other. If what you are doing now is fine for you why change it with the possibility of being miserable and going throught a divorce, etc. That is a heck of a lot more misery for the child than not getting married at all.
2006-06-24 09:57:42 · answer #3 · answered by butterflykisses427 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is just a piece of paper and it seems to be playing on your mind then what is the big deal about getting married or not getting married. It is on your mind, so just go for it. Book the local registrar and a table in a lovely restaurant nearby and you're away. I was in your shoes once and from experience, its nice to have the same name as your child and its father, I always found myself explaining, 'No I'm not Mrs D....., I'm not married yet' - makes things simpler I think.
2006-06-24 15:07:52 · answer #4 · answered by Nikita 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would get married legally for the child's sake. But it's like you're married already. Isn't it a common law marriage after all this time? If so, then go ahead and call yourself married!
2006-06-24 10:08:33 · answer #5 · answered by stevie ann 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't get married for the child's sake, get married because you love this man and want to be with him forever and show your commitment by getting married. Only make this commitment if it is what you both want, I am having nightmares getting a divorce sorted out so don't make the same mistake as me! Talk it over with your man, tell him that you really do want to marry him and be his wife and see what he says, or you could propose to him yourself and see whether he accepts.
2006-06-27 10:22:47 · answer #6 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont get married just for childs sake you dont need too, do what you both want, it costs a fortune to get married, if you all want the same name, change you name by deed poll, these days couples with kids never marry and 1 in 3 divorce anyway
good luck!!
2006-06-24 10:13:45 · answer #7 · answered by jojo78 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If both of you aren't motivated to get married then don't get married. Both of you are already there for the child. However, if you want to celebrate your love and change your last name and your child's last name, then you'll have to get married for that. You don't even have to have a big wedding, you can just get married at the courthouse.
2006-06-24 10:57:01 · answer #8 · answered by choosinghappiness 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, consider your own question, you called your partner "boyfriend". For many legal reasons and to ward off future problems get legally married as soon as possible. Create and sign a "pre-nuptial" agreement.
Everyone that I've ever known in your situation was always happier that they "tied the knot".
Keep it simple.
2006-06-24 10:28:12 · answer #9 · answered by Richard B-H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you should both want it. Don't force the boyfriend into marriage "for the child's sake".
2006-06-24 19:26:34 · answer #10 · answered by todaywiserthanyesterday 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do whatever feels right for you. I don't think it matters a great deal these days if you're married or not - just as long as you make each other happy!!!
Good luck.
2006-06-24 12:02:28 · answer #11 · answered by sal-your pal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋