Have you ever kicked your child out of the house?

Question

My son who is almost 19 drinks, smokes, does drugs, and brings 16 year old girls home and has sex w/ them in his room. I have paid for lawyers to get him out of all his legal issues... should i just kick him out now or is it way too late? What can be done about this? He is also facing a year in jail. Would it be better for him to be in jail than to be doing all of these things, or will he just get worse in jail? Thank you for listening!

Answer 1

First of all, he is an adult. He should be working and supporting himself. Why are you paying anything for him??? Stop doing anything for him, and get his happy *** out of your house. He has toatally disrespected you in every way and you are allowing it. Stop enabling him and maybe he will grow up.

Answer 2

well, i have a son that seems to act like that too...they do not necessarily need rehab at all, they are are just non-mature males. It all depends on what he has done. I do believe that if you know that he is commiting a crime though,"stat-rape",then you should draw the line. Allowing your child to perform something like that and you are not stopping him, is a crime within itself. You should kick his a** the hell out because that is pretty sick of him. An he does not have any respect for you that is why you really should. He does not appreciate what you have done and tolerated from him. Stop causing yourself pain, or letting him cause you so much. By the way,,, I kicked mine out and it feels great, the stress of his problems are off my shoulders' and he has since changed his ways and began to see that "mommy is not going to get you out of everything". If he goes to jail,enjoy the break. He does the crime,,he should do the time.

Answer 3

yeah, too late to start parenting now. sounds harsh, but true. kick him out??? you made him into a monster. do what you want. you neglected something when he was younger, this kid didn't just end up like this for no reason at all. you obviously have no authority over him, drinking, smoking, drugs, sex with what would be considered illegal in most states. he'll go to jail, maybe he'll straighten out, maybe he won't. if he doesn't he'll be dead soon. send him into the army. seriously. they'll make a better man out of him. couldn't be any worse than the road he's going down now.

Answer 4

Well, I wouldn't kick him out...that would just cause more worrying on you. If he is in jail look at it this way, you will know where he is. I don't think it's worse in jail, but I think it will teach him a lesson about drugs, and drining. You never know, he may come out of jail a completely different person. For instance, once he goes and gets out he may never want to touch another pill or beer again. Best wishes to you and your son!

Answer 5

Yes, I think it is time for this bird to leave the nest, as he clearly doesn't respect your boundaries, and he is just going to drag you down into the muck with him. He is old enough to vote, and to go and die for his country, so he should be out on his own, especially if he is behaving the way you describe. As a single dad of a 15 year old, I have told my son "I helped to bring you into this world, I can also take you out". I know that may not be so easy for you to do or say, but at this point there isn't much you can do. If he does go to jail, there isn't much you can do for him at that point either, whether he smartens up or gets worse will be on him, not you. I am sorry for you as this must be tearing you apart as his Mom, but if you keep on pandering to his bad behavior, then he will always use you as a catch net, and never learn to be a responsible adult.

Answer 6

Hard as it may be to do it, he either has to abide by your rules, or out he goes. As long as you keep paying his legal bills, he will think he can do anything he wants and you will still bail him out. If he has jail time coming, let him serve it. He needs to be responsible for his own actions, and pay the consequences. Weither or not he gets worse in jail, is up to him. Hopefully it will wake him up to the fact that there are consequnces for ones action. Best of luck to you. Being a parent sucks sometimes doesn't it? But I wouldn't trade if for the world!

Answer 7

I don't understand or see how you've let your son get away with doing these things without kicking him out of the house. I know he's your son and you love him, but he has no respect for you at all or he wouldn't be doing the things he's doing. Especially in your house. I do say your house, because it is your house. He's 19 years old. it's time he gets out and starts finding a job and getting a place of his own. I say kick him out and don't think bad about it. Have you ever heard of "Tuff-Love"? It sounds like your son needs alot of it..

Answer 8

This happened because you gave him too much liberty and uncontrolled love.
If you are in a rented house, better you leave the place without telling him.
Or take the advise of a lawyer and lodge a complaint with police.
He should be brought under law.
Better late than never.
Good luck!

Answer 9

i think u do need to set some boundaries,if he doesnt follow thru then u gotta show some tough love,but dont at the same time,it all depends on him,how he thinks,i would hate my mother for throwing me out,however i wouldnt have blamed her! if that makes any sense! u said hes going to jail,so let him do some time might straighten him up,quit cleaning up his messes,but never kick him out!

Answer 10

well i don't know about that butthat good you kiked him out because he is disrespecting you. mabey jail will do good for him but i think it should be better if he sent to the army or navy.