Funniest thing your kid ever said?

Question

what is the funniest thing your kids has said lately??
my son asked if we could go to McDonalds...i said "No, we arent eating fast food", without skipping a beat he asked, "then can we get slow food?"

just remembered another good one.
i was pregnant with my daughter last year, when my son and his older step-brother were told about the baby..*they were very excited*, we had to explain to them "where babies come from"..*they are 8 and 10*, well my son...looked at me with the most disgusted face and said, "wow mom! you sure are brave, Kevin *my hubby, his stepfather*, has MUCH bigger pee pee than me and my bubba!"

Answer 1

Standing in ine at the grocery store, a very big man came up behind us. my son (who was about 3 at the time) looked him up and down and said "You are a very big man, you must have a very big penis." The man smiled, nodded his head and said "Thank You!"

Answer 2

I worked for Delta for many years and back when anyone could go to the gates my mom brought my nephew to the airport from time to time so that we could show him the airplanes and he could ride on the train. My grandmother was making a connection in Atlanta, where I worked, and my mom brought him up to see her and I was showing him the airplanes through the window. There was a 757 parked in the gate and we were waving to the pilots through the window. There was a FULL gate area behind us and my nephew blurted out "Aunt Mel, that looks like a giant penis!" He was maybe 2 1/2 or 3 and my sister had been explaining his body parts to him around that time and I guess if you look at an airplane I guess it could be falic.

I couldnt help but laugh, my face turned so red...I was in full uniform too, so they knew I worked for the airline. I scooped him up and quickly returned him to my mother.

Another story...my niece was 4 and my mom and sisters had taken the kids down to Daytona for the weekend. They stopped at McDonald's and ordered Hamburgers with NO ONIONS. My mom had to repeat the order a few times because apparently they couldnt get it. She gets to the window, gets the order and voila...onions. So she sends it back and my mom said "I want a HAMBURGER with NO ONIONS" and my niece adds "And no brussel sprouts!"

I was babysitting my friends twin sons and we were watching the contruction crew across the street. I pointed out the dump truck, the repeated it several times, only it came out "Dumb F*ck"

Answer 3

My daughter asked a lady if she was pregnant with 10 baby's, as I am 7 months, she apparently thinks all women with "big belly's" are having a baby...
Also, when my son was 3,we were in a Fiesta Mart grocery store, and there were 2 Hispanic ladies having a conversation in Spanish, and Matthew walked up to them and started making his own "Spanish" words, that made NO SENSE...The ladies looked at me and laughed...It WAS pretty funny, and embarrassing at the same time

Answer 4

My husband drives a dump-truck for a living. He often takes our 4yr son with him. My son loves his daddy's big truck and carries a small dump-truck with him everywhere we go. Last month at the grocery store a very large women was in line in front of us, her phone went off. BEEP...BEEP....BEEP like she got a message, my son threw his arms up and yelled " Move Daddy, Shes Backing Up!" I was so embarrassed, the lady turned around and smiled at my son, and said "Out of the mouth of Babes." Everyone around us was just starring. I was so humiliated, I still cant go back into that store. I don't want to run into her again. One more thing that my son has done about a year ago at the local Wal-Mart we were in line to check out when he spotted a box of animal crackers that had Tomas The Train on them. He Yelled "I Love Percy!"( that's the green engine that helps Tomas) The bad thing is at the time my son really couldn't pronounce his R's!

Answer 5

My kids are visiting family in FL. My nephew is going through his terrible 2s right now and keeps hitting. My mother is trying to explain why he is "being so mean" as my 4 yr old puts it. My mom tells her, Nate doesnt have a sister like you do. He is always alone. He is not sure how to be nice, maybe you should teach him. My 4 yr old says, Well Nate will have a baby soon...Aunt Nicole is getting fat!!!! (My sister has gained maybe 10 lbs...has nothing to do with being pregnant! She was mortified when my mother told her!! Out of the mouths of babes!lol)

Answer 6

When my son was 4-5, we went to this drug store and Frosty the snowman was there walking around giving out suckers to children before he sat in a chair to see the kids. While we were in line, my son asked me if frosty was a boy snowman. I told him yes and he said, well if frosty is a boy then where is his penis. OMG, I about died of embarrasment.
Then when the same child of mine was 7, we went bowling an=d there stood a midget at the counter. I was getting shoes for all of us when he turned to this full grown man that was shorter then him and said "Hi I'm 7 are you 5?"
Again I could have killed him.....................

Answer 7

I have two boys and am expecting my 3rd in September. I had to go to the doctor for a checkup and my 4 year old went with me. The doc asked if I planned on breastfeeding and was discussing with me how to do this because I didn't with my 2 boys. My 4 year old was listening very carefully and when we got home he told my husband "When Mommy's baby gets here he is gonna suck on her "Nickels"...LOL. I thought that was sooo cute.

Answer 8

Well I live in Australia and we celebrate the Queens Birthday with a long weekend,my neighbours child who is 4 asked why my children were home on that particular day ,because it was usually a school day (monday)..I told her because of the Queens Birthday,she in turn replied Oh! are You
and the boys invited...lololol

Answer 9

The other day my car was broke down and in the shop, my son wanted to go to the store. I asked him how we were goin to go. He walks outside looks in the driveway and comes back insides and says " Mom, we can take the boat it has wheels"

Answer 10

When my son was 4 yrs old he was such a Hockey fan that everything revolved around hockey. When he made bad choices he would be sent to the "penalty box" aka "Time out". One day he made many bad choices, so he was sent to the "penalty box" when he got out, he walked over the Aunt Vickie and said " Aunt Vickie I prayed to God while I was in the "penalty box". Aunt Vickie was so excited, she asked if he prayed that God would help him be a good boy and make better choices. he replied "No, I asked him to send you to Hell for puting me in the "Penalty box"

Answer 11

Not really funny, more like amazing, but my 5 year old was swimming in the pool and said "Mom there's not any gravity in here, is there?" Not as much as out here I said. I dont Know were he learned about gravity he's not even in school yet!