My 4 year old daughter keeps wetting the bed. How do I make her stop?

Question

My 4 year old keeps having accidents. She is very intelligent/mature and she keeps saying that she told her brain to wait-then she wets. I have explained to her that you cannot do that. Obviously her bladder doesn't listen. We have even limited her night time drinking and nothing is working! HELP

I left out the fact that her accidents are happening during the day as well.

BUT WHY IS IT HAPPENING IN THE DAY TIME TOO?

Answer 1

sometimes its done because she is very intelligent and mature, almost similar to trying to get attention. nothing to drink 2 hours before bedtime and going before bed should work. she is only 4 and sometimes us parents expect to much because they are so advanced in other areas. be patient she will come around
best of luck and hope you have a plastic cover for the mattress

Answer 2

I don't know if you have taken your daughter to the doctor for this problem yet or not but I do know from experience that accidental wetting could be cause by many different things. It could be that she has urinary tract problems, it could be hereditary or it could be from some trauma that she has experienced. I am not saying that your daughter has any of the problems that I have just stated only that perhaps you should look deeper into the cause of accidental wetting and weak bladders. you might find the problem there. You may find this hard especially with a four yr old, but there are ways to get and keep her on schedule. First you should not limit her fluid intake just limit what kinds of fluids she does take in. I'm sure you know that certain drinks make you want to "Pee" much more then others. Soda's and sports drinks should be totally eliminated from her intake. most kids bodies work like clockwork. they eat it takes time to process and settle then the intake turns into output. "If you know what I mean". Monitor your daughter plan out a scheduled meal time for her setting a specific time for her breakfast, lunch, dinner and even snacks. try not to deter from that schedule then you can practically count the minutes till "potty time".

Answer 3

She is still young so give her a little bit of time yet.

Is she staying dry and using the toilet during the day?
Just before she goes to bed, ask her to sit on the toilet for a few minutes to see if she will go, then don't allow any more drinks.
Try putting a special protective cover on her matress so it doesn't ruin, and get some nightime training pants. They are just like regular pants but have a special lining.
Don't scold her for having accidents. We all have them even at our age. If she has been told off, or you look at her in a discouraging way she may be thinking about it as she goes to bed which could actually make her wet.Just reasure her that it is ok to have accidents and you are proud of her for trying so hard.
When she does have a dry night, really praise her up. Maybe treat her to a new pair of her favourite pyjamas. This will make her feel grown up and may stop her wetting them.

Good luck.

Answer 4

I was a bed wetter til I was 10. Not every night but 2 or 3 times a week. My son was a bed wetter too. I guess it is hereditary. There was nothing I could do to stop it. I tried the alarm in the bed to wake him at the first sign of wetting. It worked for a while. I made him hold his pee trying to stretch his bladder. I cut off his water at night. NOTHING helped. Then I realized he was as unhappy about it as I was. He did not want to wet the bed any more than I wanted him to wet it. So I gave up. I laid a towel on his bed and told him if he wet put this under him so he wouldnt lay in pee. I did keep the mattress pad on so it wouldnt ruin the mattress. And I kept his clean underwear near so he could change at night without waking me up. Within 6 months he quit wetting. He was about 7. I don't know if taking the pressure off helped or what. But I did remember how awful I felt when I wet and I knew he didnt do it on purpose. Someone once said to me, "I haven't seen a college man yet that wet the bed". And you know , they are right. So, if you can imagine... it is tuffer on her than it is on you. I would leave her alone. Nothing but time worked for me(as a child and a parent).

Answer 5

She may have an underdeveloped bladder, which has been found in several cases of 'bed-wetters' and therefore time will usually take care of it as her body grows. She may be a deep sleeper, many children are, and so she just can't always wake herself up if she needs to. There are other reasons that may contribute to bed-wetting, and her pediatrician may be able to give you some good advise.

If necessary, let her wear night time pull-ups until she gets past this problem. Commercials on TV address this also, and they have a pull-up disposable underwear for the bigger kids.

Whatever you do, please don't ever make her feel shame for this. Many children have this problem, and in days gone by there were cases of parents hanging their wet sheets out the window (Michael Landon Story) to try and embarrass their child into quitting, which was barbaric. Patience and good luck to you.

Answer 6

Hi. Have you tried using Goodnights or some other type of nighttime underwear? This way, if she does have an accident, you're not changing the sheets in the middle of the night. I had to put nightlights through the house to the bathroom for my boys so that they were able to find their way in the dark without running into things and/or being afraid. Also, you could always put her on a rewards system...something like: If you don't have any accidents for 4 days, then we'll do something really special (go for icecream, watch a movie together, etc). Hope that helps

Answer 7

Be very gentle with her. However intelligent and mature she is, she is also 4 years old.

The best way to help her to stop is to leave her alone.

Positive reinforcement when shensleeps throughand does not wet the bed,.

Say it is OK if she does and just get on with it.

I am a therapist and work with adults who still feel shame because of memories that as a child they wet the bed.

I know it is difficult (I am also a parent) but it will pass. Don't make anything of it.

Hope this helps.

Answer 8

As a mother of an ex bed wetter, my advice to you is to not make a big deal out of it. Never punish or reprimand a child for bed wetting (not that I am suggesting that you do!) Well done for limiting the amount of fluids near bedtime. Before you go to sleep yourself, you should take your daughter to the loo, as this empties the bladder and gets her into a good habit of waking up to go to the toilet. She will grow out of it, it just takes time and if she is still doing this by say age 6, then your health care worker or doctor should be able to help you out. Hang in there! It WILL be OK!

Answer 9

Have you tried getting her up a couple of times to go to the bathroom?? I was told this was a big no no but it worked for both my boys. I think the secret is to get them up with out really waking them up completely. I would try a few hours after she goes to bed( maybe when an older sib goes to bed???) and maybe when you go to bed.. Also if you get up to go check on her and take her as well. Of course if she wears pull ups it will also help. Her bladder may just not be ready yet. I wet the bed till I was 6. MOST IMPORTANT. DO NOT PUNISH HER. this can lead to other problems later in life. Its not her fault.

Answer 10

Try getting her to go to the bathroom before she goes to bed and not to drink anything 2 or 3 hours before going to sleep. Sometime they wet there bed bacause they get too cold at night try to keep her well covered at night and buy her taining pants until she learns. Every child is different be patient if not you need to take her to the doctor she might have a bladder problem that needs to be taken care of.

Answer 11

There is some new research out there about kids wetting the bed. Try this website http://www.pedsurology.com/bed.htm#Causes%20of%20Bed-wetting.

A lot of times kids who wet the bed are also deep sleepers. I would talk to your pediatrician because there could be something medically wrong as well. I hope this doesn't alarm you. Whatever you do, though, it is not recommended to chastise your daughter so that she feels ashamed. You should be open with her and see if she is having any other symptoms that she might reveal to you in case it is a bladder condition...i.e. burning sensation.