He used to lie awake wondering if there was a dog.
2006-06-23 10:45:27 · 10 answers · asked by jimbo_thedude 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Community Service
and he sold his soul to santa
the man in the OP`s joke, i mean
2006-06-23 10:56:53 · answer #1 · answered by greengunge 5 · 3⤊ 3⤋
Yes, but did you hear about the atheist and the bear?
The Atheist and The Bear
An atheist was walking through the woods one day in Alaska, admiring all that evolution had created.
"What majestic trees! What a powerful river! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself. As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.
Turning to look, he saw a 13-foot Kodiak brown bear beginning to charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could down the path.
He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was rapidly closing on him. Somehow, he ran even faster, so scared that tears came to his eyes. He looked again and saw that the bear was even closer. His heart pounding in his chest, he tried to run faster yet. But alas, he tripped and fell to the ground.
As he rolled over to pick himself up, the bear was right over him, reaching for him with it's left paw and raising its right paw to strike him....
The atheist yelled out, "OH MY GOD!"
Time stopped.......
The bear froze.......
The forest was silent............
Even the river stopped moving.
A brilliant light shone upon the man, and a thunderous voice boomed out.
"YOU DENY MY EXISTENCE FOR ALL THESE YEARS, TEACH OTHERS THAT I DON'T EXIST AND EVEN CREDIT CREATION TO SOME COSMIC ACCIDENT. DO YOU EXPECT ME TO HELP YOU OUT OF THIS PREDICAMENT? AM I TO COUNT YOU NOW AS A BELIEVER?"
Difficult as it was, the atheist looked directly into the light and said, "It would be hypocritical to ask to be a Christian after all these years, but perhaps you could make the bear a Christian?"
"VERY WELL," said God.
The light went out...
The river ran...
The sounds of the forest resumed.…
And the bear dropped down on his knees, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke:
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"Lord, thank you for this food which I am about to receive, Amen."
Disclaimer: No atheists, creationists, evolutionists or bears were harmed in the telling of this joke.
2006-06-23 17:54:59 · answer #2 · answered by he's gone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the bad part is the dog was blind in one eye couldnt see out the other,deaf threelegged answered to the name lucky
2006-06-23 17:49:03 · answer #3 · answered by stupidwelder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You answered your own question. It would have been more fun if you had left the punch line for everyone else to pick up.
2006-06-23 17:48:07 · answer #4 · answered by Starlight 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep, read it in the readers digest a long while ago
2006-06-25 12:37:29 · answer #5 · answered by nunovyorebiznis 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't really take the mickey out of dogs you know, they don't like it. I think that's really funny actually. :)
2006-06-27 07:42:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
interesting
2006-06-23 17:48:44 · answer #7 · answered by hensons6 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that one's played out....
2006-06-23 17:48:24 · answer #8 · answered by kc_brig 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
and had nightmares about the holey goat...
2006-06-23 17:51:14 · answer #9 · answered by Jen_Greebo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, u just lost 10 points....and i got 2 lol thanks
2006-06-23 17:51:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋