I need help with my 19yr, she is never home, she totaled her car, she is direspectful, and rude.?

Answer 1

Sorry, but it sounds a little too late to discipline her, because at this point the tighter you grip, the more she'll slip through your fingers (if you don't mind my quoting). Sounds like she needs new friends, new environment, or school (if she's not in one now). Find a way to effectively discipline. Counselors could help...but I don't know the details so it's hard to tell.

Answer 2

So in other words, you, as a parent, didn't discipline her when she was younger and now you're paying the price. If she's in school, move her into a dorm. If she is working, ask her to leave. You don't have to keep babying this young woman and you don't have to be disrespected in your own home. DO NOT buy her another car. Let her work and get a bicycle. It's time for this birdie to fly out of the nest, honey! give her a push or plan to go see her in jail.

Answer 3

Its time for some tough love, darlin'! Pack up her stuff, put it all outside and change the locks.

I'm not saying that it'll be easy for you to do, but you've let her run all over you for this long and unless you are willing to quit putting up with it, its going to continue. Don't talk to her about it, just show her you've made your decision and this is where you are now standing. Be strong and the best of luck to you!!!

Answer 4

She sounds like an adult to me......she needs tough love....my husband gave his parents problems...they put him out....he joined the military and became a responsible adult!!! That was the best thing they could have done for him.....don't feel that you are being cruel.....tough love makes people better....they may do a lot of things to make you feel guilty but if you don't give in....they will straighten up or not...... it's their choice and their life....she is the only one that has to answer for it!

Answer 5

she is never home - So, she is an adult
she totaled her car - now you have learned not to lend her your car. If it was her car, then so?
she is disrespectful, and rude - Set down the expectations you have of her in your house about respect and courtesy. If she refuses to follow the house rules, evict her.

Answer 6

I WISH I COULD TELL YOU SHE IS GOING TO GROW OUT OF IT...BUT ITS PROBALY TOO LATE. SHE SEEMS OUTTA CONTROL. YOU MAY NEED TO ASK HER IF SHE IS ON DRUGS. THE REBELLION AND RUDENESS SOUNDS LIKE A SIGN. SHE MAY JUST BE A LATE BLOOMER THOUGH BECAUSE I WENT THROUGHT DISRESPCTING MY MOM WHEN I WAS LIKE 13...I THOUGHT I KNEW EVERYTHING AT THAT AGE. BE SUPPORTIVE AND ASK HER TO RESPECT YOU. MAKE HER EARN HER WAY BY PAYING FOR HER BILLS (CELL, CAR INSURANCE) AND LATE NIGHT OUTINGS...WHEN SHE ASKS FOR MONEY TELL HER NO UNLESS SHE HAS HELPED OUT AROUND THE HOUSE WITHOUT COMPLAINING. OTHERWISE YOU WILL JUST HAVE TO WAIT THIS OUT! SHE WILL HAVE TO LEARN THE HARD WAY. I WISH I COULD GO BACK AND TAKE ALL OF MY MOMS ADVICE, BECAUSE SHE WAS NEVER WRONG ABOUT ANYTHING.

Answer 7

At 19 she is an adult still living in your home, tell her if she can't live by your rules and curfews then send her packing. She might just need a reality check.

Answer 8

Sounds like she has no respect for you or anyone else. I believe it is time for her to move out and face the real world on her own. Maybe then she will realize just how good she did have it.

Answer 9

TUFF LOVE tell her straight that this is not acceptable,lay out the rules if she can't follow them,throw her out,sounds harsh yep even easier said then done yep....but life is short and no one should have to spend it being walked on

Answer 10

give her a wake up call. have her get a job and pay her way even if she goes to college. many people do it and she will have to grow up. fraction the bills, if she wants to be an adult, she has to deal with every aspect. tough love!