I feel like I have no one to talk to I'm sad and lonely what should I do?

Question

I'm 14 years old and I feel sad almost everyday, I also cry everyday. I don't do well in school, I'm addicted to the computer, I like a boy but I never told him and now I'm jealous at a girl who likes him a lot and cry over this. I just can't get over it, I can't talk to my friends (there's only 6 girls in my class plus there are only two classes) I try talking to my mom she gets mad at me and says I shouldn't be liking someone at this age and I don't talk to my step dad, never did really. I really think I'm useless, I feel like I need someone there to comfort me so I can feel better and I can never do it on my own. I can't find confidence, and well I don't like Taiwan even though I was born here. I wish I could go back. I really don't want to feel this way but I have low self control over things...so, any advice? Thanks a lot!

Answer 1

It sounds like you are a very depressed young lady. Maybe instead of talking to your mom just about the boy that you like you could tell her about how sad you have been feeling and that you feel like crying alot. You are at an age where your body and hormones are changing an awful lot and it can be too much to cope with at times. I remember my teenage years all too well!!
Is there a counselor at your school that you could talk to? Or a teacher? I think you need to talk to someone about your feelings!

Answer 2

I understands, I was in similar situation. And I understand the parent thing, sometimes they can have very different outdated ideas.

I think writing journal helps to let out some of the sadness. And I really hope you can go see a Chinese counsellor, who has some background and able to understand more about these issue.

I was born in HK, and I move to North America, when I was your age, I have mix feelings about born in HK and living in North America, going back or not, etc.
And also about what parent thinks what age of child should be this way and shouldn't be that way. This is why I really suggest you see a counsellor who have Chinese background.

It's ok to feel the way you feel. Don't invalid your own feeling. Accept can make you feel better, because this is when you start to trying to deal with it and time can start healing you. If you deny the feelings, you will have this feeling stronger (it's like a bounce back), and you cannot deal with it until you accept it. You don't have to approve, but you can accept.

And it's good that you realize the harsh things you are going thru and trying to get help. Some people don't even realize, and they use alcohol or drugs to numb themselves.

Answer 3

All of the answers given have some great advice. I can add that joining some type of team may give you some added help. First, it would give you an opportunity to meet more friends. Second, it would hopefully allow you to boost your confidence level if you found a sport or event that you enjoyed and felt that you could excel in doing. It sounds like you go to a very small school. Maybe your community has a rec center. You could see what type of teams / sports they offer. Or...you could try taking some classes in an area that interests you (art, martial arts, gymnastics, dance, etc). Believe that you can do well.
Make sure that you do talk to an adult. Maybe someone at school if your mom can't hear what you have to say. You can always try writing a letter to your mom if a conversation does not work. Sometimes parents can "hear" more if you write it out and are direct. When we talk we often get our emotions mixed in and loose what we are trying to say.
Believe in you, know that you are not alone in your feelings. Try to use your energy to make your life better whether that be in directing it toward a sport, art, cooking, writing, or whatever you find is your passion!
Peace to you!

Answer 4

Oh, wow. Well, your Mom is wrong. Fourteen is a fine age at which to be caring about other people, especially boys. :)

You need friends with whom to commiserate. Is there a special reason why, perhaps, it is hard to make friends? Also, even though it's really hard, is it possible that you could just walk up to this boy and say "Hi!"? Could you ever do that? That can work amazingly well, sometimes, and if you don't try, you'll never know.

Confidence in yourself can be really hard at your age, but ... well, think about how you react to a sunset or dawn, or a beautiful flower, or neat ideas. You have potential, as is obvious from, for instance, your good spelling and grammar. Trust yourself to be a good person!

Answer 5

u can e-mail me as much as u want to. i was addicted to the computer to when i was that age. as for the guy don't worry about him find someone else. and try to study more don't go on the computer unless its a weekend. and join a sport any sport i promise u it helps. when i was 15 i didn't like any of the girls in my school cuz they cause to much trouble i was only friends with a guys. i use to go to soccer practice mad at the world and when we was finished with practice i forgot all about what i was mad about, i know its hard to believe but its true, i made so many life long friends playing soccer, and know one cares about your business cuz their just there to play. u just need to get your mind on other things. i use to cry to. look a me now some of the girls i use to know are pregnant, and i have almost straight 'A's and I'm gonna b a senior.

Answer 6

Thats exactly how i sometimes feel, Just try to find something happy, I don't know what to do eaither, It's like...you feel like no one likes you and ur just a tiny small human out of all others, all this questions running thru you're mind.. why where you're born, whats gonna happen, where am i, why was a ended up here on this world... The best thing i try to do is.... wait i dot do anything i just get on with my life waiting for an end to all the surrow to come faster... i know how u feel!

Answer 7

You need to tell your mom that you know that she doesn't like you liking boys but you feel depressed and that you need her to listen and to help you. Tell her that maybe if she'll discuss this with you that it may help you see that you don't like him ( even though you probably still will just tell her that to get her to listen.) And it you ever need to talk to anyone just contact me. I am 22 and I remember being a teen girl with crushes on boys so I may be able to give you some advice if you'll just email me. One thing I can tell you is that when you get to my age those crushes and problems you have now will not even matter to you anymore it will just be a thing of the past.

Answer 8

You need to find a friend and talk to that person after you establish trust. You also need a outdoor or at least a hobby that's outside of your home like going to the zoo or a museum. Learn to love yourself and start there be confident in yourself and except you for who you are things will get better as time goes on if you let them. Good luck and hang in there kiddo you will be fine.

Answer 9

Welcome to teenage years. Please take solace in the fact that most teenagers feel as you do...out of place. You actually are not too young to like someone obviously. I'm sorry your mom answered you that way, but she is being protective. Be friendly, try to make the best of being in Taiwan and believe me teenage-ism will eventually pass into adulthood, where there are a whole new set of problems, but also lots of fun and excitement ahead. You are NOT useless. You are a woman in training.

Answer 10

It sounds like you are suffering from depression. You need to find help fast. If you feel like you can't talk to your mom, then go to your doctor. The doctor will listen to you and will give you suggestions on what to do. He may even put you on medication. I was suffering from mild depression. I couldn't stand myself anymore. I was sad, short tempered, always in a bad mood. So I went to my doctor and she gave me a low dose of medication. These medicines contain serotonin enhancers. Serotonin is the "happy" chemical in your brain. If the chemicals in your brain are off balance, even a little, it can cause depression and anxiety problems. If your school has a counselor, set up an appointment to see them. Talking with a person who is trained in dealing with these type of situations with help you a lot.
You can also take depression tests on-line. Put in depression test in your search box and sites will come up. Take one of these tests and bring the results with you to your doctor or counselor.