i been in my daughter's life very little someone else is raising her should she still call me dad she's 14

Question

i should keep her from calling him dad and be in her life a little more right?

Answer 1

unfortunately....you are her father, your object should be to get to know your daughter not be childish and say that you should stop her from calling him dad. It's a shame people can't get it right the first time, then all the confusion would be avoided. you are her father biologically, but you say that she is 14.....your daughter and her dad seems that they have formed a bond if she call him that. you are not too late but someone else has truly done your job for you. And most likely have instilled values and a lot of respect from him. Don't feel bad if you are treated like a friend.

Answer 2

Has she always called you Dad? You cannot expect her to start this now that she's a young adult. If the person that she is calling "Dad" has been more of a father to her than you have, then you need to take a step back and think about that. If you did try to get in the middle of their relationship, it would not only be very wrong on your part, but could detrimentally affect your relationship with daughter.

Answer 3

Dude you need to man up. This is about the age little girls lose their virginity to absolute losers because their real dad is only sort-of around. She needs your love, attention, affection, and affirmation. And don't get all pissed if she's angry at you for not making more of an effort. Tell her she's right to be and that you're sorry. Then make it up to her by seeing/calling her often, writing her letters, e-mailing her, taking her places, going to her school performances, etc. Be a dad!

If you're still alive, psychologically she's not really going to accept the other guy fully. It's going to mess her up her whole life because it's you she wants even if she's angry with you. Let her call you & him whatever she wants as long as you tell her you love her and she's worth it. Don't let dirtbag boys get into her pants as a substitute for your affection. You might be a grandpa if that happens, and the cycle starts all over again.

Tell her she's a strong woman, you expect her to go to college, that you know she'll be somebody someday. Tell her she's beautiful, that she's smart, that you love her talents (she play sports? artist? drama? singer? music?). Teach her life lessons like how to balance the checkbook, how to tell a guy no, how to put gas in the car, how to drive, help her fill out college applications when it's time. It's not to late, you can still be "Dad" to her.

Answer 4

I was in a similiar situation. Met my stepdad when I was four and my real dad started visitation rights when I was 12. I have two fathers who I can goto if I have questions or need something. Its perfectly okay to have two dads. You should keep her from calling the other parental figure in her life 'Dad', it'll just create a riff between you two. I find now though, my stepdad is more like my Dad and my real father a really good friend.

Answer 5

There is a difference in fathering a child and being a dad. If your not in her life on a regular consistent basis how can you expect her to call you dad? Try spending more time with her and getting involved in her life and it will work itself out. You might be surprised how receptive she will be to getting to know you more. Don't wait it can only get worse, and being a teenager she can use all the adult guidance in her life she can get. Best of luck to you and I hope you develop a relationship with your daughter soon, it is never too late.

Answer 6

Make the effort to be in her life more. She's at an age where, well she's a teenager. I was a teenager when my mother remarried and I never called her husband dad. I would have been thrilled if my father was a part of my life, unfortunately he passed away. You are still here, reconnect with your daughter, it's not too late.

Answer 7

if she feels close enough to him to call him dad and you haven't been around you don't have much room to keep her from doing anything.

you might be her biological father but to her 'dad' is the guy who has been there for her and her mom

if you want to do the right thing of course you should be in her life. but ask yourself do i want to spend more time with her because i want to get to know her and talk to her and have a relationship or do i want to be in her life because i'm jealous of the guy she's calling dad. don't go in a disrupt her life if you are just going to disappear again 6 months or a year later.

Answer 8

Ok You are the father no matter what. You are in her life.

My real father wasn't in my life growing up and and I still call him dad I was raised by someone else

Answer 9

Was the choice yours not to be in her life? Did you try? Did you support your daughter even though you weren't seeing her? Did you send her birthday cards, and get her presents for her birthday and Christmas. Did you call her and tell her that you are thinking of her and that you loved her?

If you want to be a part of her life, it really doesn't matter what she calls you. The important thing is that you call her!

Answer 10

At age 14 she is going to make up her own mind what she will call you if she calls you anything at all. Forcing the issue will likely push her further away from you. If she calls you Dad let it come naturally.