am i realy in love?

Question

ok im 16yrs old and i think well i know i am in love its just i need some i dont know what the word is but any ways me and my g/f have been togeather for over a year and i am happy with her i mean she is the world to me she is my best frined she is so beatiful and smart and i cant keep her out of my head but people are sayn im to young to be in love but i think i am in love well i do so is it possible i mean can i realy be in real love i mean this isnt puppy love as they would call it what should i do i mean im so confused

Answer 1

Hey i'm 20 and have been in love for four years now.... Take my advice... Its ALWAYS TRUE LOVE in 16 ... ;-)

Answer 2

Heh -- a common question for your age.

Here's the answer: you are feeling strong emotions that you've never felt before, and you call it love because that's what people call strong emotions they've never felt before.

At 16, though, you don't know enough about the world, and about people, to understand how strong and how deep emotional love can be. You also have hormones running through your system that make little things dramatic, and big things overwhelming.

So what you're feeling is some combination of this: longing, lust, loneliness, impatience, excitement, fear, affection, intimacy, and probably some other things as well. Might be some love in there, too.

Does this mean you don't love her? Not necessarily; what it means, however, is that it is nearly impossible to know if you would be in love with her if those other emotions (the ones driven by hormones and inexperience) were removed. It might be that you would still love her; it's equally (if not more!) likely that you would look at her and think "what did I ever see in her?"

In fact, it's possible that ten years from now you'll be happily married to a (different) wonderful woman, and you'll do exactly that: look back and wonder what you ever saw in this one.

However, it's also possible (albeit less so) that ten years from now you'll be happily married to this wonderful woman, and with much of the inexperience (and all of the hormones) of youth behind you, you'll know with confidence that you do, in fact, love this woman.

So what do you do?

First: when making choices, and when having arguments, understand that at this age you're not in total control of your emotions, no matter how much you might think you are -- so taking a deep breath, a step back, and a few extra moments to think before dealing with important things (sex, arguments, getting married, and so on) will serve you well.

Second: know -- and I mean KNOW -- that when you think you have true love at 16, you'll find out by the time you're 18 that you probably don't, and never did. You're at an age where you should still be experimenting and dating other people. Mind you, if you're happy, that doesn't mean you should break it off and pursue other people -- it just means that you can if you decide you're not happy, and at any time she might decide to do the same. Of course, this can happen at any age, but the younger you are the more likely it is to happen. If it does, it doesn't mean you're a bad person, or unloveable, or sub-par in some way; many a girl breaks up with a boy simply because she feels she's learned enough from him, and wants to go try a different kind of boy. This age is about fun (or should be), not serious relationships.

Finally: I know you feel old. We all did at 16. And 18. And 21. I'm 35 now, and I feel old. But I haven't even hit middle age yet, and you're less than half as old as I am now! You have *so much time* and *so much to learn*. Enjoy your time, and enjoy your learning, and know that even though some things are going to hurt a lot in the next few years, it all leads to fantastic stuff later, because minor (although it doesn't seem minor at the time) emotional injury at a young age leads to personal growth, and that will make you a happier and more interesting person in the long run. Plus, you'll develop empathy for others, which is an important part of this complete breakfast we call life.

And so to answer the question in a much shorter way: what should you do? Enjoy what you have while you have it, and don't fret too much when you lose it, because there's plenty more out there.

Answer 3

I would think that you are indeed in love, 16 isn't an unusual, nor, uncommon age at which one falls in love. It's just that being in love at this age is full of so much uncertainty. When I say uncertainty, I mean that there are a lot of things going on right now in both of your lives that could put your love on a different course. Life at this age is about exploration, you are, in actuality, feeling your way through life, anything can happen as a result of your own curiosity.

Give yourselves, at least, a year after you have graduated from High School (19 years old by then), then ask yourself the same question, "Am I in love with this woman?", if you find that the answer is "yes", and she is still there for you, I'd say the chances are likely that the two of you will be a couple for many years to come. :)

Just be patient about love at this time in your life, as it can be really hard based on the things that I have mentioned earlier.

Good luck to the both of you. :)

Answer 4

You may be over infatuated with the thought of being in love.
You are only 16, you have your whole life ahead of you,
it is no use being in love when it comes to paying bills - love will not pay them.
At your age you should be getting a better education to enable you to have a good job to support your girlfriend/partner.
Without that education you will be ruining your own life, as well as hers.
I doubt whether you would intentionally hurt her, - this appears to the path you are heading for.
I wish you both well for your future0.
A W

Answer 5

Love is not a liar. Pretty profound? You can love whomever you want, when you want and nobody will ever take that from you. Don't listen to people tell you it's not real, it is real and you'll remember this love for the rest of your life. I'm an old bag of 48 and I've been around the block.

Answer 6

Yes, you are in love. You may not be in a love that will last a lifetime. But don't worry about that. You have soooooo much to learn about life, who you are, what you want to be when you grow up. Don't overly stress this relationship with the big questions of manhood that you are learning. Enjoy the love you share and keep learning all you can.

Answer 7

I think if it feels right for you, dont worry about what other people have to say, its you and her that are dating each other not the other people, there are heaps of people out there that have married there first love. Just think of the positives how you feel when you are with her. And just remember age is just a symbol, the mind and heart is what makes you, you.

Answer 8

Like it or not, the fact is (as you will realize when you are older), that it is indeed "Puppy Love"......but......always remember....."Puppy Love" is real to the Puppy! It is one of the sweetest loves you may ever know, so savor it while you can! Just don't be Puppies having Puppies of their own!

Adulthood and the responsibilities that go with it are coming your way altogether too fast and too soon.....enjoy yourself and your youth....it will provide many fond memories in your later years!

Answer 9

You sound very blur and confused. If u r really in love, u wouldn't care what other ppl are saying about ur love life or whether u r too young to be in love. If everything is fine in ur relationship with ur g.f, then u shouldn't give a damn what others are saying.

Answer 10

What don't you love about her? Ask yourself that, and then elaborate on what is there. Why it is that way, how you can deal with that. Is she someone you're willing to commit the rest of your life to, without ever so much as thinking about cheating on her with another girl. Do you depend on her for happiness in your life, how would you be without her? Think long and hard about all of that before you answer it yourself.

Answer 11

Yes you can be 16 and in love.

If you still feel this way about your gf after a year you and she are very lucky.
don't listen to what everyone else is saying, you know deep down in your heart how you feel and no one else can truly feel your feelings, they are exactly that, YOUR FEELINGS.
Just enjoy your gf and your relationship, If this was only lust it would of ended a long time ago and you would not have these feelings.
hope I've helped.