I was asked why do ladies ask the men questions that might hurt there feelings?

Question

We set them up and ask questions like "Do I look fat in this dress" and then tell them to be honest and then get made at them for their honesty. I found a man that does answer fairly but does not allow me the discomfort of being too brutal. I like a man that can talk/comfort. Anyone else !!!!

Answer 1

I personally wouldn't ask a question like that, but I might ask "Do you like my new dress?" or something I expect an affirmative answer to.

In the example you gave, I suppose women ask these questions for reassurance. The way the guy answers depends on (1) whether the woman looks fat in the dress or not (2) whether the guy can think of a tactful but honest way to answer the question (which is probably not the case), and (3) whether he's a jerk or not.

In the example I gave, I (and other women) ask questions of that kind because I know the guy I'm seeing has difficulty expressing his feelings and won't usually say something nice unless he's prompted to. After much discussion, he has admitted that his communication skills are something that he needs to - and wants to - work on, and I'm fine with that. But in the meantime, I'm not willing to be completely taken for granted until he solves the whole issue. After all that could take years, so I see no harm in occasionally fishing for compliments until he gets his act straight.

Luckily, the answer is almost always the affirmative one I anticipated, along with a little extra detail about what he likes specifically if I'm lucky. Oh, and yes, I certainly do reciprocate. I wouldn't expect him to tell me what he likes about me if I can't turn around and do the same!

Answer 2

I think some women are looking for reassurance from their men. I think some are fishing for compliments. I also think some are setting a trap- ever notice that some women are NEVER happy with the answer, complimentary or not?

I prefer to ask open ended questions like "do I look ok?" or better yet, offer options. "I could wear this or this- which do you prefer?" I really do want to know if my butt looks like a runaway buick. I don't want to find out after I see pictures of an event that rosy skinned redheads shouldn't wear blood red dresses unless they want to look like they've been boiled. Unfortunately, the trap setters have made it unlikely you're going to get a straight answer unless your questions are carefully phrased. This goes for either gender. Women are just as likely to lie to you to spare your feelings.

Answer 3

I try not to ask my man a question that I wont like the answer to. If I know I look fat, I'm not gonna ask him. LOL! I like do like an honest man, though.

Answer 4

I know! I think we all do at some point because there's that little bit of jealousy and self conscienceness.
I always ask " is she pretty?" when he says "yes", I get jealous when he says "no" I know he's lying. Why can't he just say " yeah, she's a pretty girl, but not like you"
Thay's why we ask those questions, for reassurance.

Answer 5

I believe that women do this to basically see how stable men are and are they really men, can they feel the heat and how far they could push them to there boiling point or could they , so basically I believe they do this to test men 24/7 and that ny perspective of things; GOOD LUCK, On choosing your best answer and your welcome!!!!!!!!!

Answer 6

Girl, I learned a long time ago not to ask questions you dont want the answer to.

Answer 7

When my husband gives me an honest answer, I may not like it, but he doesnt get hurt from my reaction, he'll just say, "well, you asked me for my opinion, and I gave it to ya"!!! lol

Answer 8

Very, very good point. I must admit, I have done that before... I don't know, maybe I am just trying to get a compliment or convince myself that I don't look all that bad. :)

Answer 9

Just trying to find out if they are compassionate guys or insensitive jerks.

Answer 10

haha that's funny , and true :)