Work or play with my kids?

Question

I am a single mum of two kids aged 1 and 2, i currently work casually for between 2 and 20 hours a week. I also study from home during the night and some weekends. I miss my kids so much while im at work and the money barely covers child care. should i just give up my job and spend time with my kids? My daughter is so intelligent i want her to go to the best school and i want both my children to have the chance to do scouts swimming danicing karate and sports and music classes if they choose. without a job this may not be possible? Do they need these opportunities or should i stay at home with them and give them my time? it will be a financial struggle tho and that would cause me to stress? im lost!

In australia where i live if i didnt work the government would give me almost as much as i get now by working, only i wouldnt be paying for care! and my family live 500kms away in another state, i live on an island theyre on the mainland. moving home isnt an option either.

also they only go to an actualy daycare two days a week the other 3 i have a lady at my house to care for them, but our long term lady left us and we have a new one i dont like to have to change carers as this wasnt the point of having in home care!

Answer 1

this is a tossup. on one hand, it is VERY important that you be spending time with your kids at their age. kids need to feel loved and need the support starting from the moment they're born. even though they still are young, they can sense when there's not enough time being spent with them or when they don't get enough attention. but on the other hand, you do need to be able to provide for them and make sure they're taken care of financially so they don't suffer. it's possible to manage both, but it's still difficult. just do the best you can by doing both. if you have family around that can help you while you work, it would be a little less stressful because they're with family, not strangers. but it's still good for them to be around other kids their age because it helps with their communication and development. so you could try daycare a few hours a week, see if family can help, and just make sure you make enough time for them too. when you work hard, you should play hard too. you can't just work work work and not enjoy life at all. it would almost make it pointless because the point of life is not to be miserable and unhappy.

*edit* I didn't see your additional information until after I posted. so instead of family helping, you might have a friend or someone else who can help you out and not cost as much as daycare? I understand you needing outside help, but you can't just rely on the government to take care of you and your kids. That's the problem with a lot of people, and I'm not accusing you, it's just it's so much beneficial knowing you worked your butt off and you came out of this by earning and working for it. So many people in America rely on the government to take care of them and their family, and not all of it is justifiable. A lot of people here are just too damn lazy to get a job and would rather have the taxpayers pay for their way. And by having kids, they get more money. It's some people's way of scamming. Again, I'm not accusing you, and it's good that the help is there, but it's better to manage both.

Answer 2

I'm from Australia to and a single dad of 1
i work 16 hours a week and i will keep doing it cause it keeps me in the thick of things (other jobs) by doing this i keep up with qualifications and new laws so when my child leaves home i am still up to date with all around me this keeps me confident so i will be able to do any job in my Field i don't want to become another mark on a piece of paper at centrelink but you should do what makes you happy and only as much as you can control or handle if you decide to stop work don't drop your head some others do understand how hard it is being a single parent
i hope everything goes well for you in the future and things work out the way you want GOOD-LUCK

Answer 3

In the long run you will probably be glad that you kept on working. You say 2 to 20 hour per week... even at 20 hrs per week you still have a lot of time with your babies. I can tell you adore them and just that will make them thrive. Babies love to be loved.

As they grow up and start school that will free up more of your time for work and by then you may be making more money too, if you work your way up in your company. So you really will be able to offer them some of those extras you mentioned.

Don't let stress get to you. It really will work out for you because you are smart and caring.

You sound like a really good mum.

Answer 4

Oh wow, I wish I could help you. It's so important to spend time with your kids ESPECIALLY up to the age of 3 when their personalities are really emerging and their values are being structured. Since I know it's nearly impossible to NOT work (where would the money come in?) you should really try to limit work for the next 2 years. After that, you can rest assured that things will be easier and a very important time in your kids lives will be spent with you primarily.

Answer 5

I know how it is being a single parent and doing it all alone is hard, But your kids are important and they grow up so fast, Sometimes we have to do things with our kids that are free, Children love the time parents spend with them no make s no difference memories of them are priceless, And if you really have to work get a job that is flexible enough to have that quality time with them, Try social services and see if they can help you with the cost of childcare and ask if they have programs for children your age.

Answer 6

first off, i'm sorry that you are stressed...you sound like you want to give your children the best, i applaud you =), secondly, you have to learn to manage your time...keep doing your schoolwork, because that will help you find a better job, which will create greater income...also, you are going to have to work, because you need some sort of income rolling in, even if it is a little, you can start saving up...i know you want to be with your kids all the time, but by you working, this will only benefit them....have family watch your kids while you work to save money on babysitters..good luck!

Answer 7

You've got to do both, work and play with your kids. Your the person they look up to and learn from. You work then play. Don't give up your job, in less you really want to. You can't let your kids be selfish and spoil-ed if you know what I mean. You need the money, so try to juggle both. A lot of mothers do, so you can too.

Answer 8

How will you have any money without working? A single mom has the full responsibilty of providing food clothes housing. With no income how could you do the basics needed to live WITHOUT extras?

Answer 9

ever thought of working from home? there are tons of jobs avalible on line and oyu could stay home with your kids. I know how it feels luckily i was offerd a job where i didnt have to be away from my kids too much, but i know th e pain of being away from them.

Answer 10

Tough call . I am a stay at home dad with 3 kids and I gave it all up 7.5 years ago for my kids .