So, there's this guy and we really like each other. I mean really. But I have a boyfriend and he's going away to Florida in two days! We decided not be together for those two reasons but now he's starting to question whether or not it will work long distance. Been there, done that, and not so sure. Then there's the sexual attraction between us. I wanna have sex with him and he with me but I'm scared because I have a boyfriend and I don't want to get this connection with him and then he leaves...then I'll be feeling bad. What do I do? Have sex with him? Leave him alone? Be with him?
2006-06-22 13:11:44 · 43 answers · asked by Cathy 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My boyfriend and I haven't even been together for two months and I was kind of pulled into it. I like the other a lot more and he's leaving for college. Both of us are in college.
2006-06-22 14:05:20 · update #1
And I haven't had sex with my boyfriend, I don't plan on doing so for another five months.
2006-06-22 14:06:41 · update #2
It doesnt sound like you are mature enough to be thinking about boyfriends or sex to me...i think you should spend a few more years working on yourself
2006-06-22 13:13:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its a bit confusing, but if your boyfriend is leaving to go to Florida that means a long distance relationship. and those very rarely work.
So unless you can't wait a week or two, to see how it goes with guy #1 in Florida, then make a decision to have sex with #2.
It appears, that you don't have that strong a bond with #1 and with him leaving the state, it seems best o break it off with him.
Then you will be free to play whoopee with #2 without feeling bad.
I just hope it's good as you are hoping for and not some big disappointment.
2006-06-22 13:18:21 · answer #2 · answered by johnb693 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because you WANT to have sex does not mean you should. I WANT to spend my whole paycheck at strip clubs, but that's NOT what I should do!
You have a boyfriend, and you care about his feelings. You are horny and you care about YOUR feelings.
Why not give the guy who's leaving town a kiss on the cheek, a little bit of that wondrful fluttering eyelashes action, and tell him you'll see him laer ... maybe.
Keep him hot and interested and decide just what you want to do with your boyfriend. If that arrangement isn't working, then there's time to deal with that. There's no playing around unless you two have already decided that's part of the boyfriend-girlfriend relationship - BEFORE you play around. Be honest and consistent and you will learn a way to have good relationships all your life.
Who knows? Maybe you'll visit Florida ... maybe you'll decide to make your boyfriend the luckiest guy in 5 counties!
2006-06-22 13:18:44 · answer #3 · answered by Der Lange 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Long distance will not work. For an attraction or interest to stay "alive" you need to see each other on a regular basis. For some people I guess it does work the long distance thing. But about sex with the guy you have a crush on.........if you feel it is right and won't regret it....then go ahead. But if you do it and you know you will feel guilty afterwards....then don't. Break up with the current boyfriend first.
2006-06-22 13:18:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Uh..ok its called SELF CONTROL! Sheesh! You have a bf aswell so thats cheating! OMG, think about it! Do whats RIGHT, not what you WANT to do, if everyone lived like that there would be chaos. How old are you? Eh..teens and sex...whatever. BTW im not some old prude, lol, I'm 15, and whether your older or younger, you shouldn't just sleep with someone because you find them sexually attractive. Ok well, use common sense and don't look back and say 'why was I such an idiot'
2006-06-22 13:17:58 · answer #5 · answered by PeachyFixation 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's leaving, don't open up more attachment by having sex. You'll also ruin things with your boyfriend and feel guilty. It's just an attraction, you don't have to act on every impulse you have. It will pass after he is gone, stay away from him it sounds like he is complicating your life for no reason.
2006-06-22 13:14:31 · answer #6 · answered by advicemom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I think that you should put yourself in your boyfriends shoes...I mean does he deserve to be cheated on? Think about how you would feel if your boyfriend had some secret relationship with a girl that he was gonna have sex with..Like literally imagine it happening to you. Maybe what you should do is break up with your boyfriend before anything crazy happens...because if it does your always gonna know that you cheated. and it might hurt your relationship with your boyfriend...and you obviously don't really love him if you wanna cheat so it's better to just be single.
2006-06-22 13:17:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not really clear on which "him" you're considering havin sex with, but in either case - don't.
You don't state your age, but I'm taking it that you're in your early teens. Especially if you have not had sex with anyone before, don't make these the circumstances under which you start.
And don't rely on a bunch of strangers - that include a bunch of prepubescent horny boys - you must have some adult you could talk things over with.
And, honestly, if you're that conflicted about whether or not to have sex with this guy, you're not ready.
2006-06-22 13:25:24 · answer #8 · answered by kids and cats 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to decide why you are with a boyfriend if you are questioning sex with another man. Dont sleep around! If you want to have sex with this other guy, please, breakup with the boyfriend first. Love is not something that should be so disrespected as to have an affair...it hurts all involved!
2006-06-22 13:16:28 · answer #9 · answered by hotmom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont have sex with the guy. You are already in a relationshipwith one guy, who needs two?
But you are probably not commited to your current b/f, ever stop to consider why?
If you truely loved b/f you wouldnt do this to him. The guy you have a sexual attraction to... he is moving away. Is it worth your relationship to have casual sex with him and then have to face your man? As time goes by you will be consummed with guilt over a mere fling.
Even as you ask, inside you already know what you are going to do.
2006-06-22 13:18:09 · answer #10 · answered by Red 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋