I'm going back to work shortly and I've picked a Daycare. I'm going to start taking my daughter there next week so she can can get used to it. Just the thought makes me want to bawl!!!!!! I don't know if I can do this.
Any tips to make it easier?????? Please help!!!!
*tears in my eyes as I write this :(
2006-06-22 09:14:49 · 14 answers · asked by TEMS 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
oh boy! thanks everyone. gosh reading your stories made me cry!!!! (and laugh a little) Yes, perhaps I don't want to go back to work but I want to, not so much have to. If it doesn't work out then I will stay home.
Oh, my daughter will be 11 months on June 26
2006-06-22 14:50:28 · update #1
I know what you are going through. As a parent myself and a child care teacher I see both sides. Though it is a bit different when it's your own child.
Honestly, the best thing you can do is when you drop her off, make it short and sweet. It's harder on both of you if you hang around.
Also, expect you and your child to take up to two weeks to adjust to the transition from home to daycare. It's VERY NORMAL.
This will be just the first step in her growing up. Just wait until you have to send her off to kindergarten.
You're are not traumatizing her by sending her to daycare. She will be okay and so will you.
2006-06-22 09:27:25 · answer #1 · answered by twofromheaven 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm not going to lie to you... it's like having your heart ripped from your chest. I cried all the way to work every day for a week. The good news is, it does get easier!
It's a good idea to take her for there for short visits before you leave her for the whole day. You didn't say how old she is, but even an infant will be more comfortable if it's not a totally foreign environment. That will also give you a chance to see how the teachers behave toward her and the other children at the center. Good luck ~ and remember to pack some tissues and extra mascara! ;-)
~~~~~EDIT~~~~~
ARRGH! I'm getting upset reading some of these other answers! If you have made the choice that is best for your family, please don't let anyone cause you to second guess your decision. They don't live with you or know your situation. Hang in there, kiddo!
2006-06-22 10:07:37 · answer #2 · answered by browneyedgirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I shouldn't answer this, I really shouldn't. I don't use day care because I'm a SAHM. I wish I could bring my two littlest ones a couple days a week, but that's another story.
I can tell you what it was like for me, when my mother brought me to day care (I was three, and yes, I remember it very clearly). I had no warning that I was going anywhere. I'd been with my mom all along and one day she just plopped me in the car and said we're going somewhere. She brought me into the day care and I thought it was great because there were lots of kids and mommies around. I went off to play with a few other kids, but then I noticed the other mommies were leaving. I looked around and couldn't find mine anywhere. Where was she? Why were these people keeping me here? What did I do wrong? And then, the worst question of all...would I ever see my mother again? I knew, at that time, that I wouldn't. I knew that all the kids had been dropped off here by their mommies because we had all done something really bad and our mommies didn't want us anymore. I bawled for hours. When my mother picked me up later that day, I was happier to see her than I have ever been in my life. But she wouldn't hug me, she wouldn't talk to me. She sat stiff-lipped the whole ride home. What had I done that was so wrong?! When we got home she yelled at me for being a baby and crying all day. Every morning we would get up and she would take me to this place where I felt nothing but empty fear and tremendous abandonment because of that first day.
So, now you know what NOT to do, the rest is easy, LOL! Okay, not easy, not by a long shot, but at least now you know you won't do it that way. Just prepare yourself and your daughter by talking about it. Tell her she's going to the day care, but that you will always be back in the afternoon to pick her up. Give lots of hugs, kisses, and reassurance (don't drag it out too much or that will be upsetting in its own way). Ask the day care staff if she's allowed to bring one comfort toy that she will not be expected to share. Best of luck, I know how hard this is for you. But it's probably harder on you than it is for her! ((HUG))
2006-06-22 09:29:02 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People that tell you that you shouldn't put her in day care are completely inconsiderate and ignorant. Some families cannot afford for one parent to stay at home and that's just how things are! You have to do what is right for your family. Whew, had to say that first.
I cried all the way to work when I took my daughter to day care when she was a baby. I was lucky and only worked part time, but those first 5 hours away from her were loooonnnnggg. I totally understand how you feel. It is hard, but you can do it! Keep your goodbyes short and sweet. I always said a quick prayer in my head before I handed her over to the sitter. It always gave me comfort and made it easier for me to leave. Good luck, it's smart of you to start her a little early so you both can get used to it. You don't want to have to walk into work the first day back with tears in your eyes.
2006-06-22 09:25:48 · answer #4 · answered by disneychick 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first time, I cried all the way to work.
You might want to see if maybe you can hang around the daycare for a few hours the first day, just to get yourself used to the idea. This way you know that she will be fine. Also, if you do get worried you can always call the daycare, they should be happy to tell you how your daughter is doing.
2006-06-22 09:21:01 · answer #5 · answered by sunshine4504 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Like I was casting my son to the wolves. All your feelings are pretty much the same as mine were. Trust that you chose the right care for your daughter. If your employer is flexible, perhaps a few flex days might help you to make the adjustment. Take a lunch break to pop into the center from time to time and see how she is doing. It takes time, but you will get through this and your daughter will too. Best Wishes~
2006-06-22 09:31:12 · answer #6 · answered by Finnegan 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first day is not bad, the child does not know what is about to happen,and are usually amused by all the bright colors and toys. It's the second day when the huge tantrums begin when you head for the door, because now the child knows you are about to leave him or her for a long time. It gets easier, and all the day care workers say that the child cries for a few moments when you leave, and then go about playing shortly thereafter.
2006-06-22 09:22:37 · answer #7 · answered by Olive Green Eyes 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's really hard and you hear terrible stories. It will take some getting used to for both you and the baby. Make sure it is a good daycare and make unexpected stops and visits to the center. Any funny business, find a new daycare. Many blessings.
2006-06-22 09:23:09 · answer #8 · answered by butrcupps 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason you're feeling so badly about this is that you know it's not the right thing to do. You should be raising your child, not someone working for minimum wage. Do whatever you have to do to stay home with your baby. Sell your car, work when her father is home, anything!! These first few years are so important. You will never regret staying home with her, but you are already starting to regret daycare. Good luck!!
2006-06-22 09:31:38 · answer #9 · answered by Tiss 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I remember dropping my daughter off at Pre-K. All of the other kids were crying for their moms! I thought Sarah will cry too. She looks me straight in the eye and says "Mom go home. You're smothering me." I walked out crying!
2006-06-22 09:41:24 · answer #10 · answered by angelpockets 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋