My 5yo daughter recently changed preschools due to my new job. She was at her previous preschool from 6 weeks of age until 1 month ago. She has been at her current preschool for 1 month. Every day she starts crying when she sees the turn to the preschool and cries, saying "I want to go home and stay home with you". This was NOT her normal behavior at her old one--she'd blow a kiss and off she ran to play. We sat her down and asked why doesn't like it--she says the kids don't play with her (the school age kids), she says the 4 YO's play with her and she has been in the 4 YO room before when I've picked her up. It seems they don't have a lot of 5 YO that haven't been in kindergarten yet--most of the kids in the 5 YO room are actually 6 or 7 YO. The director says on the field trips they take she has fun and plays with the other kids. The crying thing is SO unlike my child, I'm worried. She's not a manipulative child at all. HELP! My 'mommy sense' is going on overload!
2006-06-22 07:56:35 · 9 answers · asked by Jen-Jen 6 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I should probably mention that she hasn't started Kindergarten yet, she starts in August.
2006-06-22 08:29:48 · update #1
She is old enough to tell you whether she likes it or not now.I have a 5 yr. old boy and hes been to a few daycares and some of them he really didn't like.So I took him out. And if your getting a bad feeling, you should take her out mom.Good luck!
2006-06-22 08:02:34 · answer #1 · answered by whitewillowsong101 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I went through the same thing with my son. I am a teacher, so I get the summers off, therefore I was not going to enroll him in daycare until I had to!! I decided that I needed a year off of work, so he didn't end up going to daycare until he was 1 and 1/2. He was really picky about the people that he would allow near him, I knew this was going to be really hard for him. What we decided to do, was since I had the summers off, and by the time we enrolled him, I was pregnant again, We took him to daycare for a 5 day week. The first day, I played with him, and then once he got comfortable, he went a played by himself for a little, but I stayed the whole time. We were there for 4 hours. On the second day, We did the same thing, but he stayed for 6 hours, and I stayed for 5. I went to the local coffee shop for the last hour while he was there. The third day, he was there for 4 hours and 2 of those he was alone. I was really proud of him. On the 4th day, I only stayed an hour, and he stayed for 4 on his own. By the end of the week, I just dropped him off, stayed for a few minutes to get his stuff situated and he was fine. My daughter was the complete opposite. She started at 7 months and loves it everyday. I think the key to it all, is to stay with her, and let her know that daycare is good, not scary. Do what I did if you can, it really seemed to help my son!
2016-05-20 11:45:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a mother of three and a childcare provider I understand where you are comming from. You are not alone. In fact you should jump for joy that you have a very healthy and normal child. This is normal behavior and as childcare workers we would be more concerned if they didn't react that way at first. As adults we do the same thing when we start a new job but we have developed coping skills to know how to manage the stress. As long as she is not expressing any concern of abuse or neglect from friends or teachers I think that you should not give up easily. You might want to try taking her to the park and showing her how to invite another child to play with her in the sand or swing with her. If you start off then after a few times suggest she invite another child to play. This will teach her how to be the one to start a friendship. Many children don't know how to do that and if there isn't one of those children in her class it is likely that is the reason they aren't playing with her. On the other hand the crying is also a VERY normal thing with young children. They are not trying to be manipulitive but they are just trying to find out will mommy rescue me from this or is she going to help me figure this out or is she going to ignore me. The best thing that you can do for your child while you try teaching her to make new friends is tohug her and say "Mommy loves you very much and has to go to work. You will have lots of fun today and I will be back when I am done with work." and then walk out. DO NOT TRY TO SNEAK OUT! While this may help you avoid seeing her cry it will only make her feel insecure. You have to let the teacher have an opportunity to bond with your child so she feels comfortable with them as well. Let the teacher know what the plan is and keep checking in with her for progress.
Good luck and keep your senses straight! You are going to pull through even if it takes a while (P.S. sometimes after the kiddo's get used to the new situation they will continue to cry just to see if you will still rescue them, then 2 minutes after you leave they are fine.)
2006-06-22 08:23:19 · answer #3 · answered by AmyDMomOf3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can see why she wants to stay home because nobody wants to feel left out. If the older kids won't play with her then try a different daycare or try hiring a babysitter so she can stay home. It's not like she needs the socialization from daycare anyway since she's in preschool.
2006-06-22 08:17:46 · answer #4 · answered by BeeFree 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs more time and explain that she is new and the younger kids are happy to play with her, which she should, but give the other kids time to get to know her better. Tell her to try to find one kid that she likes around her age and get a little friendlier with her or him It all takes time in a new place. Just like you in a new job.
2006-06-22 08:10:11 · answer #5 · answered by Libby R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there always like that a first.
i'll get used to it,just leave them there and go,don't comfort them it will might the situation worst.
if it doesn't work out ofter a few tries just hire a babysitter or just leave trhe kid alone all day 24/7...too young for that though,maybe when 10 that will work.
2006-06-22 08:01:20 · answer #6 · answered by thats_hella_hott 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok..some people suggested putting her in a different day care..what if she doesn't like that..will you keep putting her in different day cares..she probably was used to the other one and her old friends and the problem is she's just missing it. I think you should leave her in it because she needs to learn to adapt to different environments..but at the same time understand her feelings.."can't always get what you want"
2006-06-22 08:08:21 · answer #7 · answered by shalinelovesyou 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try a different daycare, I had a simliar problem. switched up daycares and everything went back to normal
2006-06-22 08:01:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
let her go to the other pre-school!!
2006-06-22 08:01:02 · answer #9 · answered by babynam2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋