My parents are divorced!i livve with my dad in anihiem and my mom use to live in long beach. My mom just moved about 5 weeks ago to lake arrow head .. i use to go to my moms mostly EVERY weekend.. but now it is differrnt since my mom lives 2 hours away. So she said she would pick me up every othere weekend. So the first week she was there she said : We need to unload everything so you can come over next weekend .. then the next weekend i came over .. then the next weekend i was with my dad and then the next weekend my mom said said : ooo i cant come get you i am haveing ur aunt over so i cant come get you... then the next weekend she sad : oh i am babysitting and now i call her today and said so when are you picking me up this weekend and she said : this weekend i ma tooo busy .. so next weeekend will be better for me.. It is soooooooo unfair .. i have gone up there once since she has lived there and she has lived there for 5 weeks .. do you think this is unfair?
2006-06-22 07:21:45 · 33 answers · asked by ♥♥ 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well i like living with my Dad , but he is really stict .. and my mom isnt that strict , but it sorta seems she is always thinkin about herself .. or my 2yr old bro or my 9 yr old bro or the baby she is pregnant with or my step dad .. it seems like she never has enough time for meeeee! but i would rather live with my dad , but i wish he wasnt that srtict and he has 2 kids to. and then they both have me .. so my dad has 3 kids and my mom has 3 kids and is pregnant
2006-06-22 07:28:56 · update #1
yeah sure it looks that way. just don't jump the gun and get mad at your mom. this could all be unavoidable. just tell her you really want to come up and for her to not make any plans to prevent your visit. If she still continues to have excuses...i dunno, try talking to your dad about it. maybe he'll talk to your mom about the way it's affecting you.
2006-06-22 07:27:20 · answer #1 · answered by messagebeliever 3 · 5⤊ 3⤋
I'm a mom and this isn't how I would behave but I don't know your mom and she may have some real things that have gotten in the way. 2 hours there and back and then another ride to and from 2 days later can make you hesitate. My advice is talk to your mom. Talk not demand. Have some ideas ready for her to help the situation. Example, ask your dad to drive you 1/2 way once in a while and have mom meet you. If you have aunts or uncles that could do the same thing that would be good. Depending on your age, could you take a bus one way? and she could drive you back? I don't think there is a train going that way but maybe there is one that goes part way and she could meet you. You need to let her know, in a nice way, that this is hurting you and making you feel bitter about her moving away. You are her daughter and she needs to do all she can to help you grow up but you can't make her do anything. She may have issues that need to be dealt with so be patient and keep talking to her. Kids aren't the only ones who hurt. If you are patient and loving to her, she will want you around even more.
2006-06-22 07:54:02 · answer #2 · answered by Barbara 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life is not always fair. Moves are not made lightly. If your mom moved, it was because it was the right thing for her. Since she only moved 5 weeks ago, she probably is really busy and, if you are the typical teenager, you are not much help. Give her time to get settled.
What isn't fair is that she tells you she will come for you but then disappoints you. Try to give her the benefit of the doubt until she settles into her new life. I'm sure that things will then straighten out and you will see more of her.
The babysitting might have come up sudden and been a situation where she was helping a friend out during an emergency. When the aunt came, maybe they wanted some adult time together. Parents are entitled to a life and don't have to explain to their children. Things are not always as they appear.
2006-06-22 07:36:50 · answer #3 · answered by ilse72 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are a lot of things unfair about your situation actually. The biggest one being that your parents could not work things out and got divorced. But yes, what your mom is doing is unfair. Parents should ALWAYS have and make time for their kids. It's called loving and caring for YOUR child.
2006-06-22 07:28:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfair, yes but that doesn't help. Tell her how you feel but be prepared to get on with your life without her as much. Sounds like she is trying to re-establish her identity. Does not mean she does not love you ! Just that she is a little lost right now. Unfair yes, you deserve more ? YES but she may not be able to give more right now. Hang in and BELIEVE in yourself, you will come through all of this OK.
2006-06-22 07:37:07 · answer #5 · answered by tchrist36 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, but the bigger thing that is unfair is that your parents didn't try hard enough to make the marriage work.
You've at least got your mom pretty close. When I was 14, my mom and I moved to Wisconsin and my dad was (and still is) in San Diego. Try seeing part of your family every year or year and a half.
2006-06-22 07:25:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well sounds like you would rather be with your mom try to explain this to your dad and mom and see what develops.
Yes it is unfair I think parents should spend as much time with there kids as possible. It helps with trouble kids, respect,love,relationships, you name it that is why they are called parents.
NOTE:
If you don't want the responsibility of children DON'T HAVE THEM! It is a life long commitment not a 9 to 5 job!
2006-06-22 07:30:56 · answer #7 · answered by shellshell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your mom is an adult and she is busy. I don't think it's right if she is telling you she will come get you and then at the last minute says she can't come. Have you told her how this is making you feel? You just need to call her and tell her how you feel. It's not about being fair or unfair, cause life is not fair.
2006-06-22 07:26:18 · answer #8 · answered by sonik_starz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I think it is very unfair. The truth is that people in general will make time for the things that are important to them. I hate to say this but it sounds like your mother is not making you a priority in her life. If you look back will you see that she has always been this way because I doubt very much that her move has caused her behavior. Look at your life and find the good things that you have (maybe a good father, grandparent etc...) focus on those things and take your mother for who she is. Please do not expect her to go out of her way to spend time with you because I can tell you that is not going to happen and you will be hurt and disappointed over and over again. If your expectations of her are low then there is little room for disappointment. Save your emotion and energy for those people in your life that are worthy of it.
2006-06-22 07:32:34 · answer #9 · answered by B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm glad somebody posted this!!! I was looking for a freakin article that talked about how unfair the ref was in this game and I came upon this post (ONE POST, I'm surprised other people haven't bitched about this yet). The ref kept giving out yellows to Japan for no reason and Honda and Endo did absolutely nothing to get them! Japan clearly deserved to win this game because the referee was a dumbass. FIFA needs not only goal line technology but better referees!
2016-03-15 15:52:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's unfair. Something is going on. It's almost obvious. It's possible she had your aunt, but then why not have you, too? you have the right to see, your aunt. But after that time, makes me wonder. maybe she's been having an affair.
2006-06-22 07:26:10 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋