I am a 20 year old girl, and I live with my mom and younger brother. He is constantly disobeying her, leaving the house until all hours of the night, and it's hard for me to do anything because I don't want to get in the middle. Also he at 5' 10" and me at 5" 2" it's hard to stress that I'm an adult and he should respect me and my mom. She has tried grounding him, and taking stuff away, but nothing seems to work, and one of these days he is going to end up in jail. But I don't think that would even matter to him. He starts the 10th grade in a few months, and we are afraid since my dad died 15 years ago, that since he hasn't had a good role model, he'll end up down the wrong path. Any advice?
2006-06-22 07:09:23 · 16 answers · asked by charmed45390 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
2 words....Boot Camp
I have 2 sons, 21 & 20. Older boy is a good son, never gave me grief. Younger son though, hard times, wouldn't do as told or asked. He is 6'2" tall, 230lbs. and thats way bigger then me. I gave up, and sent him to a boot camp style education center, and that has seemed to turn him around.
Try it, can't hurt. And if it doesn't work, at least you know you tried.
2006-06-22 07:19:50 · answer #1 · answered by x_pistol_x 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well if the child is as "bad" a you say there is a program the army has called job corp it takes 15 to 24 yr olds and trains them for life in general. To try and explain it best i can: When enrolled in job corp you can finish or get your high school diploma, they will train you in a job of your choice, and you have the added benefits of the army , you have actually uniforms sleep in barracks, and answer every question with yes sir no sir. You have the complete discipline of the army life. It is an extreme option but from what you are explaining you have and extreme problem.
There are many many programs that help single parents with disobedient children try summer camps. I know money is sometime an option although alot of summer camps have payment plans.
Any note there are many options out there you just need to research your options. Most of all stand back and take a good look at your problem and make sure it is not an obvious problem that can be fixed at home.
2006-06-22 07:23:34 · answer #2 · answered by shellshell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope that I can help I had an older sister like that so I'll tell u what my parents did. When he leaves the house (so he is not in the way) remove anything electrical and fun from his room like the T.V and stereo any games like playstation. You can take his mattres his bed away and make him sleep on the mattres. Also bolt his window down so he cant sneek out through the window. Another suggestion that well hopefully have a good impact is to take his bedroom door away so he dosent have that pravicy. Tell him when u starte to see an improvment he well start getting his stuff back. If nothing works u have to really consider sending him to bootcamp. Hope it works out for everyone,goodluck.
2006-06-22 07:20:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hard answer,
Its not your job to puish him and maybe thats not what he needs.
He is not going to respond to authority from you. You have to let him know how he is making you feel and making your Mom feel without condemning him.
Ask him what his five year plan is and how you can help him get there . What does he love and how can he turn that into a direction in his life.
Boys go through a phase when they need to get there ya ya s out. That's OK. But he still has to look forward, set and meet goals. Try to communicate that in a positive way.
Good Luck, God Bless.....
2006-06-22 07:23:54 · answer #4 · answered by tchrist36 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say: be his sister, not his parent. Even though you're 5 years older, if you attempt to exhert authority over him, he is going to resist. You are only 5 years older, from his perspective.
Talk to him, as his sister. Tell him your concerns. Something is bothering him; It's not necessarily the lack of a paternal figure, but it could be that.
2006-06-22 07:14:35 · answer #5 · answered by niuchemist 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have heard this somewhere I think it was doc. Phil. Take everything that he has that he enjoys t.v, games, movies, even his bed. Make him suffer as much as possible. Believe me if he doesn't have any of these things he may change his mind about his behavior.
2006-06-23 03:59:14 · answer #6 · answered by Beth 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take da cellphone way no going out and dont buy him clothes dat are 4 brand dont buy him good clothes or shoes !! take way all his good clothes hide them and until he listens 2 u hide shoes 2 !! make him wear DIAPERS !! AND IF HE STILL KEEPS IT UP MAKE HIM TAKE DA DAPERS 2 SCHOOL !! everytime he dot listen smack him or just tell him keep it up and u will never see ur damn ****** clothes!!!!!!!! make him work and talk 2 him
2006-06-22 07:19:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you and your mom are going to send him to a Children Behavior Hospital If he don't listen to you. ( Sound like you mean it.) Also Get a school Counselor for him he may need one. It sounds like he needs a counselor.
2006-06-22 07:21:36 · answer #8 · answered by camicat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try talking to him first. If that doesn't work, try getting him a part-time job to occupy his time. This way, he won't have that much time to hang out, and when he is not working he will be too tired.
2006-06-22 07:17:44 · answer #9 · answered by stephete 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i used to pick up the other phone when i'd get mad at my brothers knowing they'd be talking to a girl...and say"josh,mom said where'd you leave the food stamp card? you had it last !
or "josh,mom said get her wic cards and go get some milk...then run like hell...but i promise,it works...then they will be afraid to pick up the phone and they will strike deals with you...
2006-06-22 07:13:45 · answer #10 · answered by crystal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋