I recently got married, and now everyone (friends, family, whoever) keeps asking "So when are you gonna start having kids?". To which I respectfully inform them that I don't Ever want kids. And then they ALWAYS say "well you're still young, I'm sure you'll change your mind."
I wont change my mind. Why do people think I will? Why is it that because I have ovaries I have to have a kid? Why is it that everyone thinks you can't be happy unless you have a family? Aren't there any happy childless people out there?
2006-06-22 05:51:37 · 22 answers · asked by Peaches M 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Everyone thinks you should have a baby coz they have been conditioned to think that all normal people must have kids especially after they marry. Now they do not realise that exceptions exist. Bide your time, listen to them but do not get upset by their comments.
2006-06-22 06:02:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
People think and ask stupid questions like that because society makes people think that you are supposed to get married and have kids. I have an 11 year old son from a previous marriage and when i got remarried everyone started asking us too. I dont want anymore either and people say the same thing. YOUR YOUNG, you may change your mind!! NO, i wont. i am 31 with an 11 year old. I am done! Tell them to mind there own damn business!! and you can be happy without having kids. I am not saying that my son is not my world and i love him like no other person on earth, BUT there are pro's and con's to both sides of it! just be happy!
2006-06-22 12:56:23 · answer #2 · answered by mml619 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have an older cousin who went through the same thing. She's in her 40s now, and people finally got the hint! But, there for a while, I know it was really tough on her, especially when she got into her 30s. People finally left her alone. I think it's rude when people do that, but it should eventually die down.
My husband and I get that question constantly as we've been married for just over a year. We do want kids eventually, but not right now. People don't always understand that either. But it's your own life and you've got to do what you feel is right. Don't ever let anyone make you feel like you don't deserve the life you want. Just ignore them and let it roll off your back. It'll eventually stop.
2006-06-22 12:57:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They think you'll change your mind when you get older because most people do! Don't take offense... it happens all the time... sure there are happy couples with out kids... but nothing compares to the joy of having children... and those in your family who have kids know that and want that for you. You don't HAVE to have a kid... no one is saying you do... but it's only natural for relatives to want to see little ones come along... especially your parents and your hubby's parents... they wanna be grand parents.
2006-06-22 13:03:25 · answer #4 · answered by Jembee1720 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its been like that forever people expect newlyweds to have children.. But they aren't the ones that have to have them and raise them... I`m a Mother of 3 and 1 step daughter.. I`m glad i had my children.. I`m sure IF you ever wanted Kids you'd make it happen.. Dont worry about what others say my dear... Enjoy your Marriage.. as long as you and your Husband are happy dont worry about anything or anyone else... Good luck!
2006-06-22 13:14:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure thjere are many childless couples. But there are twice as many , or more couples who do everything they can to have a child. No, just because you have ovaries doesnt mean you must have children but remember you're throwing away a gift that others lack.
2006-06-22 12:56:29 · answer #6 · answered by metafrastria 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure there's several happy childless people out there. I think you should be commended for realizing that you don't want children, the only people that I know that never wanted children and became parents are the WORST parents I ever met. I wish they would have thought about it like you did first. :-)
2006-06-22 12:57:09 · answer #7 · answered by Karen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not ready for a baby at this time...but I don't think I would be truly happy until I had a family of my own. I am sure it doesn't work that way with everybody and you are entitled to choose not to have any kids. Have Fun!
2006-06-22 12:55:11 · answer #8 · answered by Luna 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about you, but sometimes I feel to have baby and sometimes I don't. I think most of the time, i don't, but I know eventually I will, just because I want to give continuation of me, not because I am women and have ovarian. I don't feel obligated to have baby because I am women.
About what people say, I think they are only trying to be friendly with you, I don't particular think, they want to boss your life. This is what most people say to someone after they get married, like they ask, when you will get married, after years of dating the same guy...or what do you plain to study when you go to college. Are all normal questions, without the intention of bossing or pushing you to do something...just things people say when they get to know about someone had recently got married, or about someone is finishing the school and so on...It's basically society.
Don't be upset with them, they don't intend to get you upset, plus, more questions like this will keep coming on.
2006-06-22 13:08:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know a few people who have said to me when the topic has come up "I don't want kids, I want to focus on my career." At first I was floored. I LOVE kids so the idea shocked me.
But you know, if you don't like kids I think it's good that you aren't going to have them. It wouldn't be fair to them and it wouldn't be fair to you. As long as you and your hubby agree on this issue, just smile and roll your eyes at everyone else.
2006-06-22 12:56:18 · answer #10 · answered by Wowzer-Bowzer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋