I do NOT get along with my Aunt or Uncle and would prefer that they didn't come to my wedding... My Grandmother adores them though and has been getting angry with how everyone else responds to them.
When the question comes up (from my Grandmother or Aunt and Uncle) what should I say? There's still space so I can't say we ran out of room.
2006-06-22 04:28:14 · 14 answers · asked by Wowzer-Bowzer 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
This is your wedding, not hers. You have whom you want. Let Grandma know, tactfully that you understand how she feels, but she too must acknowledge how you feel, and this is your day.
2006-06-22 05:20:57 · answer #1 · answered by ♥monamarie♥ 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You wait until there a lot of people around, then you do a little dance while singing "Nyah-nyah-nayh, YOU aren't invited!" Doesn't that sound charming?
Of course it doesn't. But is any less rude to use your guest list to tell the world who you do or don't get along with, who you do or don't like, who you do or don't approve of? Trust me, your reputation will suffer if you insist on publicly humiliating your relatives by excluding them from this important occasion.
You must limit your guest list by OBJECTIVE, not SUBJECTIVE, criteria. For instance, you can limit on the basis of degree of kinship. So you either invite ALL second cousins or NO second cousins -- you don't cherry pick on the basis of personal taste. Or you can choose to invite or to exclude children under 16, but must follow the rule consistently -- you can't invite little Bobby Angel while excluding little Betty Brat. (The exception here is that children and/or siblings of the bride or groom should be included even in a "no kids" wedding.)
Tell your Grandmother that you have thought it over decided that family quarrels should be kept private, that your wedding should be an occasion for people to come together, not to express grievances.
Their is a tradition for dealing with guests one fears may be disruptive. Some "forceful" friends or relations take turns "keeping company" with them. If their behavior turns ugly, the forceful friends "escort" them "outside for a little fresh air".
Best wishes for a lovely celebration.
2006-06-22 11:54:04 · answer #2 · answered by kill_yr_television 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't invie them, invitations are too expensive to send one to someone that is not going to wish you the best. It's your wedding bump the confrotation. Now if someone else is funding your invitations then thats a different story. Just make sure it never makes it to the post office! And MAKE SURE when you place your announcement in the newspaper or local advertisement it does not say ALL family and friends are invited and it does say that no local invitations will be issued. That's just in case they live in the same area as you.
2006-06-22 11:45:16 · answer #3 · answered by FlawlessKarat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would invite the aunt and uncle and let your grandparents supervise them since they would be offended if you don't invite them. If you don't, your grandparents might not come. All in all it's your choice. I am just second guessing what is likely to happen.
2006-06-22 12:19:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This happened to my son & daughter-in-law. They did NOT send the invitation and the person 'assumed' that it was lost in the mail and showed up. My son was really having a hard time, but agreed to just suck it up and enjoy 'their day'. Now 9 years later, he says it was one of the best lessons he ever learned. Just focus on YOUR day and let Grandma babysit them.
2006-06-22 12:13:54 · answer #5 · answered by GP 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Invite them, unless they are notorious for ruining parties. Let them talk with your grandparents. You don't have to talk to them, other than thanking them for coming. You don't want repercussions from the lot if you don't invite them. They are family, like it or not, so give in and let them be part of the celebration. Your stubborness is the real issue here. It won't be that bad, trust me.
2006-06-22 11:35:56 · answer #6 · answered by garayfive 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can say that they are invited to the wedding but because of space limitations they are not invited to the reception.
2006-06-22 11:32:07 · answer #7 · answered by stillshyneing 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to your Grandma how you feel about them. Remember, this is you and your soon-to-be-husband's special day - you can invite or not invite anyone you want!!
2006-06-22 11:37:13 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them you want your guests to be those you are close to, and since you don't get along with them, you didn't invite them.
2006-06-22 12:25:40 · answer #9 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oooh That's tough...I am going to solve that problem by eloping! Sorry I can't be of help, but I know where you are coming from
2006-06-22 11:53:41 · answer #10 · answered by CaseySokach 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋