i hate my stepdad what should i do?

Question

he hates me and vice versa he makes my life hell

Answer 1

I'm presuming you still have a relationship with your real dad, but even if you don't, this still applies. Don't think of this person as your 'dad'. Think of him as just another human being, with faults and good points, just like you. If you take away the expectations that come with you thinking of him as a father figure, he will stop disappointing you. He is not your dad. Equally, he needs to remember that he is not your dad in the way he behaves towards you. However, he is an adult (again I'm assuming you are a child), and your mum's partner, so you have to accept some 'parenting' from him if you live in the same house and he's paying some of the bills. Write a list of everything that's good about him (there must be something), and everything that you don't like. When you have had a good look at the list and asked yourself why you don't like certain things, write a good/bad list about yourself from his point of view. This may help you to understand your relationship better. Just see him for what he is - what we all are - faulty human beings. He's not your dad. Good luck. It's hard.

Answer 2

obviously hes not going anywhere soon. So maybe try to make the best of it. Find something in common and work on it from there. If all fails well at least you can say you tried. Then move in with your Dad and stepmom and maybe it will be the same there maybe she will hate you. Now to be sensitive if your dad has passed away and you have knowhere to go sorry about that. Hang tight it could be worse.

Answer 3

I am a step dad too and there is always an issue of resentment on both sides. He may resent the fact that you come along as part of the "package" and you may resent him for taking the attention from your mom away from you. He doesnt have the benefit of being your natural father and seeing you grow, and you maybe dont trust him in the way that a child trusts their parents. Try and understand why you feel the way you do.

Answer 4

Have you talked to your mother and told her how you feel? I have children and remarried, so my kids have a step father too, and I am a step mother, and my step son moved in with us a few years ago, and believe me I am not taking his side, but it isn't easy to be a step parent either. It takes alot of work for everyone to get along in a situation like this, but it can work out. It would be super if you would post a little more information about the situation though, like how long have they been married, etc.

Answer 5

i hate mine to but hes not my step dad just my mums husband! hes done some really horrible stuff to me even seen me walking the streets with nowhere to go when it was snowing! depending on how old u r there are a few things u can do i find that being overly nice does the trick! he dosent know how to take it coz normally whatever i do he changes it round to make a conflict but just bite your tounge and be nice! very very hard i know but works a treat! the other option is to be a ***** but dosent really get u far! trust me ive tried that!

Answer 6

well, you havent given any details, but, there is one thing for sure:
You can't change him, you can only change yourself. Try to be the better person, and don't do anything you'll regret. This is a HUGE challenge for you, maybe if you step back and look at it objectively, you'll find an answer.
*hugs* and good luck!
(also, your mom loves him, right? if he treats her well, maybe you can talk with her and ask her what his good points are, that you arent seeing. if he mistreats her as well, then talk with her about getting him to counseling or something... but, she always needs your support and love!)

Answer 7

Try to get along the best you can. The answer that said, Kick his *** and then sleep was him was completely out of order and I'm sure you know that. Life is to short to fight with someone you live with.

Answer 8

why do you hate your step dad what did you do .... befor you conclude on hating you step dad at first you should know that he is there to solve you problems so if you hate each other how can he solve you problem in school works and in every thing that you do ... so if you hate your step dad right know you should resolve that and start to like you dad he is the only family you have

Answer 9

You should talk to your mother about it. Tell her how you feel and how your stepdad behaives toward you. She should sort the things out and make the suitable family atmosphere.

Answer 10

you need to tell someone about this, especially if he is abusing you (emotionally, physically or sexually). From personal experience, I would advise against talking to your mum about it as this can drive a wedge between you, and then he has won, and it would get worse. Try Social Services x good luck!