Im in a clinic for rape therapy and I feel like Im losing it...?

Question

Im in a clinic for rape therapy I guess you call it. My friend music_girl was sent me by Jesus and i decided to come here. I listened to her and gave up all my drugs I had hidden for killing myself. She is my angel and i love her so much I feel so helpless and hopeless and Im fighting off depression. I have meds but my life is washing over my mind right now and I feel like Im ready to run from this place and get wrecked on drugs so I can feel better. Its sooo hard to deal with this in a real world. I feel like there are to many things to deal with at once. Its overwhelming me right now. I dont know if I can continue on with all this. Everybody here loves me and Im locked in but im so weak. plz pray for me. I have limited time on line so I dont know when Ill be back.This verse helps me Jonah 2:2

2 And said, I cried out of my distress to the Lord, and He heard me; out of the belly of Sheol cried I, and You heard my voice. [Ps 120:1; 130:1; 142:1; Lam 3:55-58.]

Jonah 2:7

7 When my soul fainted upon me [crushing me], I earnestly and seriously remembered the Lord; and my prayer came to You, into Your holy temple.

Answer 1

Thinking about you. Just keep doing what they ask of you, stay honest and keep talking it out. You'll be fine.

********** Edit...

Mr Mister, if you have a problem with me, then take it out on me and not someone else. Stop being a coward.

Answer 2

You must not give up hope. Read Psalms 139. I been in ten hospitals and had four suicide attempts. Through it all I became stronger... and now I am able to help others.

No matter how much people love you it won't matter till you are willing to love yourself. I know this is very very hard. But you need to see yourself as God sees you!

There is a 2 good books out there I really want you to read. The first is called "Bondage Breaker" by Neil Anderson. It has a lot of solid stuff to help you heal. But you can not read it alone. You need some close Christian support to help go through the pages with you a little at a time because the book is very very intense. I recommend a chapter a week.

Another book which has a work book to go with it is called "The Courage to Heal". This book is very very powerful as well. You must use that book with a licensed professional because it will cause you to be easily triggered. I could not read that book all the way because I tried to read it all by my self and the pain that surfaced from all my memories led me to become suicidal again.

For now... write... do as you are doing. Not at this forum. There are dangerous people here. I even reported a child molester here last week. Go to a safer website. www.suicideforums.com has a rape site there for people who have been sexually abused to go and chat with. There are many many people there that can help you. I go there frequently. I was once a basket case... I have my ups and downs still but now I am stronger. You will be too... remember Psalms 139. It is powerful... and it will give you hope. :)

Answer 3

Dear sister I pray that your hear receives consolation from the Almighty. I understand your pain. I was abused sexually several times growing up as a child. I had lost all hope a couple times and felt the urge to end the suffering and come out of the darkness.

What kept me going though was remembering the people I loved. Not wanting to hurt them. The most important though was God. I learned in that time the importance of relying on Him. Cry out to Him. He is there and will hear your call. Most of the time when you are so deep in the pit of despair you can't feel Him. It's a feeling like you are in a deep dark hole with slippery sides that you can't get out. Look for the light and you will find it. Remember your pain here grants you forgiveness and mercy from The Forgiver. God is The Most Merciful and The Most Gracious. He is The Healer and The Comforter. None have more of these attributes than Our Creator. Turn to Him in your despair.

If you ever need someone to talk to you can e-mail me. You will always have a shoulder to cry on in me.

And remember. When you think of ending it think of how that means you are letting THEM win. Whoever did this has violated your body. Don't let them win and violate your whole soul. If you heal and become whole again that is the biggest revenge. Don't let this wretched person win. Fight and win. I know you can.

Answer 4

Hello, Princess -

You are just so sweet. I just keep wishing I could be there with you.

It's ok to be depressed for a little bit if you need to. The meds will help, but they take at least 2 weeks to start working. It can take up to a month for them to get up to full strength. Until then you need to really be careful, and under constant care may just be the right place for you to be in. I know you've been suicidal. Whether or not you think a few comments about it are that serious, they are. The thoughts are there in your mind, and in moments of despair they can seem bigger. You need the help you can get from the people in this clinic. They are experienced in this very thing, and they will help you.

I know trust is a huge issue when you have been so violated, but you have got to learn to trust your therapists so they can help. They can't get into your heart and head to help you if you don't let them in. Tell them everything. Let it all out. That is the only way you are going to really be able to heal.

Here's my favorite scripture, maybe it will help you - Psalm 40:1-3:

"I waited patiently for the Lord; and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry. He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings. And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God . . ."

I wish you a new song.

Answer 5

Princess- I am not going to tell you anything you havn't been telling yourself already. Listen to your councelors there at the clinic and find a good Christian website that may have better forums than this one. Keep reading your Bible. But this forum is not really a safe place for good intelligent answers to some of the problems you are facing right now. But if you can, put up with some peoples degrading answers there are some people like me that hang out here who are williing to listen. My prayers are with you and will always be. God loves you Princess and Princess I LOVE YOU! Be tough things will get better.

Answer 6

Oh I will pray for you! Remember, the Lord NEVER gives you more then you can handle....So I think that you must be a pretty strong person! So just remember that with God ALL things are possible! And he makes all things happen for a reason! So dont give up your life to drugs....give it to God...he will do wonderful things for you! Even though bad things will always happen...they will work for the better in the end! He has a purpose and a plan for you!

Answer 7

Larger the problem, greater the hero....

If it was a small problem, anyone can handle it right..
heroes are made at the hour of defeat...

you can see it as an opportunity to overcome your weakness..

remember that, the soul has greater power than anything in the universe...

If god has given you something more than you can handle, then you would be dead by now..

remember that weakness is never the way out,..weakness is the greatest sin, and the greatest burden in the world..

It is strength that brings heaven even in a second...so be fearless..and have faith in yourself..

never say you are weak..have faith in yourselves and in god...

Answer 8

I am so sorry to hear that. It might be terrible what happened to you.
I passed through very hard things too and felt very much like you do...hopeless. On those time, I used not to see things how they really are or were, becasuse of the depression caused by my trauma. I know if I tell to let time takes care of this, won't help you at all, actually I think it would make you feel even more hopeless. In times like this, the last thing we want to hear is about time, becasuse we are in pain and we need an imadiate relief, something that time can't give. On this case, I would suggest you to do what I did. Try to think on those whom love you, how devasted they would be without you, have you think you have the power of bring more umhapiness for your loves one, if you kill yourself, have you thought, maybe they can do the same if you do something like that?
My point is, you are much bigger and important than you can see. I am not saying this to you to make you feel better, but to try to help you see things clearly, since your actual condition, prenvents you of that. Inseat of fighting to keep alive for yourself, try to do it for those whom love you. Don't think about what will be your life tomorrow or about your future, because as I said before, you won't be able to get the real picture of your future right now, so try concentrate on now and what your decisions and actions can do right now if you do something like killing yourself. If your pain is big as was mine, and some whom I know, you won't feel capable of causing the same or bigger pain for those whom love you very much, and have done all they can to help you...so help them too, live for them, they deserve you making this sacrafice for them.
I trully hope have helped you in someway and I know for sure tomorrow you will look all this back, and realize how strong you are of being able to make up, you will feel extremely proud of yourself and the best part, those whom know you, we feel proud of having a great exemple like you to follow and to inspire.

Answer 9

Tell someone where you are how you are feeling and ask them to help you. There is no shame in asking for help--God put us on this earth to worship Him AND to help each other.
Maybe you will find comfort in this:

Psalm 18:28-33, 35, 36
For You will light my candle; the Lord my God will enlighten my darkness. For by You I can run against a troop, By my God I can leap over a wall. As for God, His way is perfect. The word of the Lord is proven. He is a shield to all that trust in Him. For who is God, except the Lord, and who is a rock, except our God? It is God who arms me with strength, and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of deer and sets me on my high places. . . You have also given me the shield of Your salvation; Your right hand has held me up, Your gentleness has made me great. You enlarged my path under me so that my feet did not slip.

Answer 10

I answered your other question, and I think I'm going to say something different this time.
You were violated GET REVENGE.
The only thing that is really going to help you get over this, is to take back the power you lost.
You may not agree. That's fine. But you're always going to be thinking "He got away with it" If more people took action against the ones who trespass upon us. People will think twice before doing it again.

Answer 11

Hang in there, the Lord will not give you anything that you cannot handle. Just think about it, once you are clean you will look back to this time and be so proud of yourself! I will pray for you.