Can my engagement be broken because of the stupid mistake I made?

Question

I got engaged this May. I knew my fiance' for15 months. We had our ups & downs.I thought he was insenstive & I reacted 2 everything he said.Sometimes I got upset & angry.So he kept going back & forth.Many times he tried 2 break up with me 4 dumb reasons. So I told mom & sis about my relationship. She knows I hacked into his email, I snooped his computer & tryed to read an email he wrote 2 a girl this March but couldn't read it & also suspected him of the person who stole our Identity when my mom & I became a victim of Identity theft.. My sis recomended a Dr. Phil book & I read it & changed my attitude towards him. Now he treats me with respect. Now I love him alot but he loved me from da start. I told sis my best friend will b my maid of honor & she'll b brides maid. She's mad about that. I fear sis will tell him everything when she meets him 4 da 1st time. Mom said I shouldn't have told her everything because she's known 4 badmouthing me. I regret everything because I love him.

Answer 1

Your best bet in this situation is to own up and tell your fiance the truth. You don't want to get married and right away you are starting your marriage off on the wrong foot - with lies, deceit, and looking over your shoulder to see if your sister is gonna rat you out.
It might not be easy to tell him but you need to tell him everything and explain to him why you did it. Now that you have changed and he can see the change he will know that the things you did in the past aren't going on now. However, there is always a chance he will take it very poorly and be angry (which he has a right to be) you did rifle through his things and hack his computer. You just need to figure out if you want to always be paranoid about your sister and if you can go about lying to your fiance.

Answer 2

I dont think so that there is any thing bad about that and some one should feel so serious about that. All the relationships are based on trust. You have a relationship with ur mom and sis first and then him. He should understand this and if he is sensible then he should respect u and ur feelings. U may take some more time to understand him and vice versa, otherwise no need to spend ur life with a stupid person like him.

Answer 3

Maybe you should delay the engagement to make sure you are both where you need to be mentally and emotionally. This will also give you time to sort things out with your sister. Try and understand how she feels and find a way to fix it. It is your wedding, why not have two maids of honor? There isn't a law against that!

Answer 4

first of all, it really is your wedding ceremony, no longer your sister's wedding ceremony and also you settle on who you pick on your wedding ceremony social gathering and who you pick to ask. in case you do issues to delight human beings then you isn't satisfied and also you would possibly want to experience sorry about it. when you consider that your sister has been time-honored to badmouth human beings, then she did not should be a maid of honor from the initiating, it really is probable between the rationalization why you probably did not pick her contained in the first position. If she does threaten you about telling your destiny husband about your "secret" do no longer make it worse through arguing which includes her, save your mouth close before it receives worse, tell her what she reported is hurtful and then leave the room. If she does finally end up telling your fiance about your secrets and techniques and your fiance confronts you to it, be calm and tell your fiance that you needed help and also you needed someone to talk with and your sister became there yet she is likewise time-honored to backstab human beings and when you consider that of this she isn't your maid of honor. searching a accessible excuse with out arguing about it will make your fiance comprehend. in case you tell your fiance and also you act all nervous, your fiance receives suspicious and commence wondering what you probably did once you 2 were seperated. So be calm and get to the point and each and every thing will be wonderful!

Answer 5

Why are you marrying someone that you don't trust? Marriage is a lifelong commitment and shouldn't be taken lightly. Sounds like you need to dump him and find someone that is trustworthy. If he stole yours and your mom's identity, was talking to another girl on the computer, etc, is that really something you want to deal with the rest of your life? Those actions show otherwise about him loving you.

Answer 6

Of course the engagement can be called off. But, if you truly love him, you will tell him what you did and ask for his forgivness. You shouldn't have done it and now you have to pay the consequences or be blackmailed over it. Sorry But True!

Answer 7

Sounds like to me that you haven't learned that you can't trust family. I am sorry to say, but most of the time when some un-wanted information gets out it is normally from someone in the family.
If you are really worried about it getting out, you should come clean and tell him........If he really loves you he may understand.

Answer 8

if you end up breaking up because of your snooping.. .then he must not love you as much as you claim... but do own up to it! its always better to tell your love the truth before it becomes "he say she say" ... heck its not like you cheated on him with someone! Ive looked into my bfs emails many of times, and messed stuff up. but we are still together cause we both know that no matter what... we love each other

Answer 9

this relationship sounds doomed. if you trusted him, you wouldn't have been snooping. if your sister knows you were snooping, then it's only a matter of time before he knows. maybe u should come clean with him about what you did. then together you should both go in for counseling.

Answer 10

It would be better to call the engagement off and move on - too much has happened. Best to move on and find someone better.