My son's father and much of his family have been drug addicts for years. I would like for our son, who is 1 and 1/2, to be with a family that are financially and emotionally ready for a child where the mother and father are together and happy. He wants to keep our son but doesn't want to stop spending all of his money on drugs. I know he won't change and he won't be the right role model. The legal system is in favor of keeping the child in the family and probably won't let himgo for adoption. I can't afford a lawyer and make too much to get one for free. I want my son raised away from his father without any contact...what do i do??
2006-06-21 11:37:27 · 13 answers · asked by ? 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
No I can't get legal aide..we make too much money as i have already said. And yes, I am willing to deal with the sacrifice of giving up my child for HIS sake, NOT MINE!! I am not selfish and I want him to have the best life. If I cry over it, I don't care. It was my mistake and he didn't ask to be born in this life with an emotionally unstable mother and selfish drug-addicted father. So please don't answer with all your sad stories of how you gave up your child. I don't care! Your child is probably happy..but do you think about that? Or how unhappy YOU are...move on with your life! I will. I know I don't have it in me to be a mother by myself. I can't even take care of myself. So, to answer your questions..instead of mine...The court favors the blood family, yes, and they would rather have him go to rehab or give us both custody than to go with adoption. But,what would that solve? He will go back to drugs afterward. He was raised with drugs around him..I dont even have proof hes using.
2006-06-21 16:41:22 · update #1
Is the legal system really in favor of him if he is a drug user? I know here in CA you can sign up for free legal advice through the courts. I would try to do that in your state. Fight for your son. You sound like a good mother. Try to keep him away from his dad until he gets help.
2006-06-21 11:48:05 · answer #1 · answered by Kitty 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I adopted out my unborn baby boy august 30th of last year. I would do anything to have the chance to look at him everynight and hold him in my arms. Look at your son right now and tell me you can go the rest of your life without seeing his smiles and watching all the new things he will encounter. Has he said love you mama yet? Has he climbed up in your lap on one of your bad days with daddy and put his arms around you?You have no clue what it is like to sit alone everynight and talk to a child that is not even born yet telling him how much you love him and how sorry you are for not having the fianacial ability to be there for him the rest of his life.I have not stopped crying and will never get over it. Take your good income give the guy a finger and run. If you have the will, you will find the way. Give your son a chance and be there for him. And do me a favor, hold him everynight and tell him how much he means to you. Knowing that some one out there is holding on to there son and not letting go some how makes my pains a little more to bear. Be strong.
2006-06-21 13:35:36 · answer #2 · answered by christineh689 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could try a joint/shared custody thing where his visits are monitored by social services. That's the only thing I could think might work in your situation. I went through the same thing with the father of my child. It's not an easy road to travel, but keep your head up and pray hard. When children are involved, it's a sad thing. You'd think grown people should just know how to be more responsible when they have someone depending on 'em and looking to them for guidance. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers. Good luck!
2006-06-21 11:49:00 · answer #3 · answered by Shining Ray of Light 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cant you take your son and live somewhere else away from this family. and make a new fresh start away from drug abuse every day. how would you mentaly cope with out him knowing you would not see him again. what is more important to you..drugs or son. do you want to live in this enviorment. its going to be the hardest decition of your life. but you seem to know what you want to do. and how you are going to do it. my friend had a son 19 years ago the father ran off to ireland. she gave the child up for adoption. every day of her life she thinks of him. never forgets his birthday date. she wonders what he will look like what he is doing. shes got a girl of 10 now. but not a sec passes with out her thinking about him. she wasnt allowed to have any contact. so she doesnt even know where he is. do you want this for the rest of your life. why dont you just think. you could walk away from this and start again. please be careful with you decitions. and good luck.
2006-06-21 11:49:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Contact legal aid, they will direct you. Can't you get complete custody of your child? Legal aid will be able to help you there too. Why complete custody? Then you can give the child up for adoption. I don't agree w/ that, but that wasn't your question.
2006-06-21 11:44:41 · answer #5 · answered by starrship08016 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are lots of adoption support groups online that can help you. Never Give Up!
Great Articles
http://www.adoption-help.org
Support Groups:
http://groups.msn.com/theforgottenpeople...
Yahoo! Groups
http://groups.yahoo.com
SearchingRegistry
familytiesadoptionsearch
adoptee-support
soaringangels
usaadoptiondatabase
touchedbyadoption
Google Groups
alt.birthright
alt.support.adoption
alt.support.adoption
Source(s):
Never Give Up!
2006-06-21 18:27:42 · answer #6 · answered by xmas90 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to social services or there is also legal aid. They can probably help you. And "In the family" refers to any blood relation not just the parents.
2006-06-21 11:41:25 · answer #7 · answered by joys.poohbear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does your sons father live with you? Support you? Support your son? If not, then it's possible you CAN have his rights terminated and then place your baby for adoption in a loving home.
2006-06-22 04:37:10 · answer #8 · answered by alpharee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it would want to nicely be accessible to have the courtroom rule something alongside the lines of "mum and dad consent no longer required" because he has truly abandoned the toddler and also you. you would possibly want to do as many have reported and signal custody on your kinfolk and enable their adoption lawyer preserve getting the termination or relinquishment or ruling from the courtroom. i'm no longer effective what your state might want to require....yet in a lot of states that is accessible to get a "consent no longer required" ruling...it takes longer although and could devour up funds on the lawyer end. sturdy luck!
2016-10-20 11:51:42 · answer #9 · answered by arrocha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try this www.itsaboutlove.org It is a very good adoption website. Hope it works out for you and your child.
2006-06-21 11:49:37 · answer #10 · answered by myjamsandwich 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋