4 and a half month old son is driving me crazy?

Question

M infant son who will be 5 months old july 3rd cries for no reason. His peditrican gave him a head to toe exam and ruled out colic and basically said, he is just fussy!!! He cries and whines non- stop , at least 2 times a day. How can i deal? I kicked my foot and made a hole in the wall today, the other day, i broke a crib wheel off his crib, he drives me that nuts. My daughter as an infant was so good, he is a terror!!! I dread a new day coming cuz i know i have to put up with his crying nonstop again(I have him 11 hours a day) . I get so depressed cuz of it. I am even fighting with his dad cuz of it now. If i hold him, he gets even more iriatated, I just have to leave him in his crib and close the door. has anyone else gone through this?? I'm afraid he is going to be so bad as a toddler

Even when i feed him, he whines for a good half hour and then it is a full blown cry

i can hardly go anywhere with my daughter without him being real fussy wherever we go. I feel so bad for my daughter who is now 8 years old

I am starting to really hate him

i even have given him tyneol when he is fussy...nothing works

I am so mad at my boyfriend as he pressured me to have another kid and this is what i got, a screaming baby

is this just a boy thing? cuz my daughter was never like this. I was able to take her out as an infant , she was so good

I don't hate him, I meant to say "I hate the way he is acting"

Answer 1

YOU NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP!!!!! There is something wrong with YOU!! You act as if he is a teen that is doing things on purpose - he's not!! You really need to seek professional help for yourself!! Maybe you have something wrong with YOU and you are taking it out on him. Everytime I read one of your questions that are this hateful toward your baby, I want to report you to CPS. I know that they have already been to your house - from one of your other questions - and I hope they take both of your children away from you and lock you up. Your idiot boyfriend should take your baby and get VERY far away from you!!

Have you ever thought that MAYBE your baby knows that you resent him and is just uncomfortable with you? Your mother is probably turning over in her grave. You are disgracing her memory with your irrational & unloving behavior! Shame on you!

Answer 2

I know exactly how you feel. I experienced the same thing with my baby (now 9 months old). It sounds a lot like colic, also it might be extreme gas. Try Mylicon drops. If that doesn't work (and in my case it didn't), I would almost guarantee that it's colic. The pediatrician doesn't seem to know what he's talking about because colic is unexplained fussiness that seems to go on "forever". In that case, and I know you don't want to hear this, but there is not much you can do about it. That was my case. Just know that it does get better over time. Hang in there. You did the right thing by leaving the baby in the crib crying; sometimes you have to do that to keep yourself from doing something bad. There were times I felt like leaving and never returning. I know how you feel. Your not alone. If possible, get a sitter a few time a week so that you can have some time to yourself. Also, if the weather is nice, try to spend time outside, that might help do the trick. One last thing, have you tried a baby swing?

Answer 3

First off this often happens, it was the same with my brother and I. He was the older and a perfect angel, and I was well let's say not so much. I wasn't really fussy but I was always up and about, much to my parents annoyance.

I think you have to find another way to deal with your anger at it. Is there someone who can help you out? Mother, father, aunt, friend etc.? Someone who when you feel this frustrated to call on and let you rest for a little, go out and talk a walk or whatever.

I also think you should go to a different pediatrician and get a second opinion. If the most fussy of babies I haven't don't cry that much. Of course I don't deal with infants that much I could be wrong, but it might be worth it to get a second opinion, maybe there is another reason other than cholic that he is crying for.

You have to find another outlet for your anger when it builds, if you can seek some counselling if for just your own piece of mind.

Answer 4

I have had 5 boys and I am expecting a new baby after Halloween. My oldest son who will be 13 on july 19, was my most difficult baby out of them all. It was almost like he was fussy for the first three and a half years. He made me feel bad,mad, sad and angry-because no matter what i did nothing would help him, and i felt like a failure. Try rocking him, or taking him for a drive, leave him with grandma takes some of the stress of mom. Just remember when you cant take it any more just put him down in his crib or swing, where ever he is safe and go take a breather. It is ok to just let him 'cry it out'.

Answer 5

ooh, i know the feeling. my now 3 year old son went through that for a while. i left him in the crib and closed the door, just like you. i made sure i tried everything i could at first, though. he was safe in his crib, and i needed to cool down. after that, maybe you can try try again, if you still need a break, call in reinforcements. while you're cooling down try to think about if you were in a situation where you were unhappy about something and not able to communicate it to the person who was caring for you- how frustrating that would be. poor little thing is upset or uncomfortable and can't find any relief on his own. a stressed mother cannot deal with a screaming baby, though, so if you're unable to regroup and relax, you're just gonna have to let someone else give it ago. also, try mylicon, gripe water, or colic relief drops; teething tablets, teething rings, or baby oragel.

and don't feel bad about people giving you a hard time or saying you're a horrible person about saying you are starting to hate your son. at least you're reaching out for some help. keep your head up, mom and remember this phase is just temporary. go to your doctor and see if you may be suffering from post-partum depression.

Answer 6

it could be a number of things that are bothering him it could be gas which if you have ever had it you know that it doesnt feel good it could be teething which i would imagine is painful as well he could be hungry or tired you just need to figure out what is bothering him so badly because obvioulsly something is wrong it will just take some patients on your part you cannot let him make you mad enough that you break things because that means that there is a chance that he could make you mad enought that you acutally harm him try playing with him on the floor maybe he just wants to be able to move around you cannot leave him in his crib all the time it is not healthy for him at all if he irritates you that badly try walking outside and taking some deep breaths until you calm down it is just something that you will have to learn to deal with i am watching a little girl right now that is the same way but just a little younger and sometimes i just have to go outside and breathe so that i can calm down but i have to deal with it because i need the money and just because he is a fussy baby does not mean that he will be a bad child his whole life it just means that he may need your attention some more now while he is younger just try to calm down and not let it bother you so much it will pass

Answer 7

If I were you I would find a babysitter for part of the day to give yourself a break, and find ways to calm yourself down. Kicking holes in the wall and breaking things like a child isn't teaching your children anything positive. Babies cry, that doesn't make them bad, that means something is wrong with that poor baby. Take him to a different pediatrician and get a second opinion. He is at the right age for teething. Try teething tablets, they are homeopathic and dissolve in your babies mouth. then let him chew on a damp rag. He probably cries when you hold him because he can sense that his mother "hates" him.
Maybe you should also look into anger management classes. I know what it's like to deal with constant screaming of an infant but i couldn't imagine ever saying I hated my son. I hope everything works out for you. best of luck.

Answer 8

Shut him down and show him who is boss. I am a teacher and this is the same type of stuff that I have to deal with only on a different level.

It seems as if he is whining and crying to get what he wants. Are you giving him what he wants? If you are, he has already conditioned himself to act a certain way to get things.

He may also be doing what he is doing because he sees that it gets your attention. Maybe think about spending some quality time with him, not that you don't already, but some quality time doing positive things.

As far as the crying goes, leave him in his room/crib until he stops. He will realize at some point in time that the way he is acting will do nothing for him. WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT GIVE IN TO HIM AND GIVE HIM WHAT HE WANTS!!!!!! He needs to learn the real way of getting attention and getting what he wants.

You could also try setting up some sort of rewards system with him. Example: If he goes for an entire day without crying or acting out, rent a movie for him or get him some ice cream. You could also try getting your daughter involved by having her model for him how children are supposed to act.

Getting mad and breaking things does not seem too healthy to me. Your children will see you doing things like this and figure out that they will do the same thing when things are not going there way.

Good luck, shoot me an email if you need more help.

Answer 9

First of all, I am sorry you are going thru all this pain. It's beyond frustrating I know. But TRY to BREATH for a second and read this:
Your doctor may be prescribing you gas medicine, that stuff doesn't work.
Your best bet is to get your baby boy on Whey Hydrolysate Formula.
Whey is a certain type of protein in milk that is easier to digest than others.
Colic is one of the most frustrating things yet one of the easiest things to get rid of, I promise.
DO NOT give him soy milk, it's got aluminum content and and excessive phytoestrogen equivelant to 5 birth control pills a day.
If you tell your doctor this, they may dismiss it, it's the truth.
I am not sure where you can find this formula but you can make your own.
If you want his colic to go away and you want him to stop crying for hours to the point where you're going pull all your hair out and scream mary, try the Whey Hydrolysate Formula.
Then, remove ALL DAIRY from his diet.
Your boy is not digesting his milk. This is a very, very painful thing for him as it is for you to deal with.
Your baby needs you to fix this problem rather than break everything in the house, you need this too. You also need a break. I don't know about your situation but search and find one person you trust who can nurture your baby for 3-4 hours.
You need it.
Just remember, your baby is in pain. He's not fussy. He's in pain.
If I could, I'd make it for you but if you need me, contact me anytime.
Your baby doesn't want you to hold him b/c he's in pain, sort of like women who don't like to be touched during labor.
Massage his belly gently and esophagus when he's calm with warm olive oil.
Try the whey, it will work. Try the olive oil.
Breath woman, take care of you and baby.

Tylonel is not the answer. Tylonel is good for aches and inflammation, not what your baby is crying about.

Try this, the next feeding, try giving him warm chamomile tea or peppermint tea. See if that helps,
I know it's the milk he's drinking.

Also, for your depression and stress level, girl you need to meditate.
You don't need beads and a hum, you need time to close your eyes and concentrate on something beautiful in your mind without judgements, hate, or fear.
JUST TRY IT once for 10-15 minutes, then try it again the next day or in the morning.
You also need support. This is support so read on.
Your baby needs to feel a better aura around him, I am certain he feels your stress level.
You're not bad for saying you feel as if you hate your baby. I'm just praying that you truly don't. Think of all this rationally, it will pass, do what you can do to solve it.
Both of you are in stressed, help your baby and you will get the same.

Look into NST Therapy as well.

OOH! I FOUND IT!
Good Start by Carnation: commercial whey hydrolysate formula.

Answer 10

Whoa! I feel for you, really. I have 4 kids of my own and know what it's like not to have any time for yourself or feel like there's no way out. It's also very hard to believe that you're actually starting to "hate him". Although it seems like his behavior will never change, it will. First off, be happy that he's healthy, it could be a lot worse. A friend of mine almost lost her daughter in a near drowning accident and now her little girl can't even cry as she is in an open-eye coma.
What should be an area of concern is your temper flying off the handle, it's a good thing you leave the baby alone for a bit. Try changing your attitude to a "what can i do about this?" from a 'his driving me mad!!' attitude. Try any number of things to help him feel comforted, I'm sure your aggravated state is not soothing to him. Ex: give him a quick bath, play music loudly, try a variety of music too...my son at 6 mons loved techno and rave (heavy bass put him to sleep), turn on a vacuum, or toss a small blanket over him and lift it up playing peek-a-boo...I wish you the best of luck and more love for you both!!!! And from one mom to another who never get enough time for ourselves, I really feel for you...if all fails, have someone watch him for a day or 2. i'm sure you'll miss him.

Answer 11

Does he cry/scream harder when you pick him up or touch him in anyway? It's remote, but there is some type of condition that causes babies a great deal of pain when they're handled in any way. I saw an expose on one of the news shows about this about a year ago. I wish I could remember the name of it, dang it! Probably not that anyway...it's a pretty rare condition.

How long has he been doing this...since birth, or just recently started it? When he starts crying, check for things on him...does he have a tag in his shirt/shorts that's scratching him? Does he have a mosquito/flea/bug bite somewhere that's making him ithcy and cross? Did he grab a handful of your hair while playing with you or your daughter, then get it wrapped around one of his fingers or toes? Is his diaper on too tight? Did he get enough sleep the night before or with his morning/afternoon nap? I know these sound ridiculous, but hey...you have to rule out every possibility.

I was very fortunate that I got my "screamer" out of the way first. Compared with my older son, my younger one is a dream. He was a very "needy" baby...non-stop whining until we picked him up, but thankfully now that's he's crawling and starting to creep along, he can get his own toys, books, etc.

I really don't know what to tell you, other than I sympathize with you, and like most things with babies/kids...this too shall pass.

And please, don't say you hate him. You don't hate your baby. :( You hate the way he acts right now.