My bf is going through a rough time right now with a family member's health and I want to show him that he does have people to turn to that will care I told himbut I wan't to show him. He says he is sometimes selfish about me and wants me only to be with him but I know that isn't selfish, it's cute and lovely. But can I do to show him that no matter when I still am here to comfort him.
P.S:for any perverted answers. No sex isn't the answer.
2006-06-21 06:10:55 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
"I LOVE YOU" are the most powerful words in the world. =)
2006-06-21 06:13:28 · answer #1 · answered by Lord of Luster 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your question is a very kind one, and it shows that you sincerely care about the well being of your loved one. At this time he does need support, during the crises and after the crises.
Most men have a difficult time reaching out for support, with this in mind, know that by you telling him that you are there for him and by actually BEING THERE, you are doing a terrific job. Be there to listen to him. Be there to hold his hand. Go out of your way to give him an extra phone call when your away from him.Most importantly, be their while he is visiting his sick family member (even if your just waiting in the other room while he visits). By doing these things he will know that you are his ROCK. You will be showing him that indeed, you are part of his support system.
2006-06-21 06:18:46 · answer #2 · answered by AJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be understanding and supportive. Most of all, don't be needy during this time. Your b/f is going through enough and he doesn't need the extra pressure of dealing with anothers neediness.
As far as him being selfish with you...I would reexamine that. It's no longer cute and lovely when he becomes obsessive and controlling. You must be very young... Don't get all caught up in the cute and lovely stuff. Look at the reality of your relationship and make sure both of you are doing the right thing.
Good Luck!
2006-06-21 06:15:53 · answer #3 · answered by fourcolor4u2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not your job to fix his problems, that's something he's going to have to deal with on his own. If you really care about him, then the best thing you can do is just be really sensitive to him, listen to him, take his hand when he's not expecting it, surprise him with a kiss on the cheek every now and then. It doesn't take a huge amount of energy or a big surprise to make someone feel better. It's the little things that get us through each day. The more of these you can find the better. Just let him know you're there for him and that you care for him.
2016-03-26 23:58:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all everyone is different. All I know to tell you is just be there when they want to talk or cry on your shoulder or whatever they want to do.
My husband is in the same situation you are in. My father has been in bad shape for years now. 4 years ago they told us that my father would not make it to Christmas. He is a diabetic, and he never took care of himself until he lost his leg. Diabetes has attacked his heart so bad that they cannot do a by-pass on him. There has been many days and nights that they have called the family in, to say our last good-byes, but he just keeps kicking back, thank God. But anyway, to get to my point, a lot of the time when Dad is doing bad, I close up and don't want anyone to see my pain. I want everyone to think that I am strong emotionally, when inside it is taring me apart. I have always been a Daddy's Little Girl. I even go so far as pushing my husband and family away, instead of opening up to them. I don't know if your b/f is going through something similar to me, but I know it makes me feel good just to know that my husband is here for me, and he loves me. And when the day comes that I am too tired to put my front up, he will be there for me to cry on his shoulder.
Be careful not to push yourself on him, as to make him open up to you. This can cause anger, and an emotional block to build. Just let him know you are there, and then just step back and help with whatever you can help with.
I hope this makes sense.
Good luck and I hope everything goes well for you and your b/f.
2006-06-21 06:25:59 · answer #5 · answered by sweetpeachiebear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By reading your question I think that you are doing the right thing already. You realize that he going thru rough times and I guess you talk to him all the time, telling him that everything is gone to be okay. COMMUNICATION, is always the answer between me and my wife, when it comes down to comfort & understanding the way we both feel. As long a you two are Communicating, the comfort will fall right into it's place.
2006-06-21 06:18:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're doing it, Sista Girl. Just by making yourself available to him, is good enough. You can't imagine how much that really means to a person that is going through (especially with family), just having someone there for them to bounce off some of the heavy stuff, makes the load just alittle lighter, and believe it or not, that does more for the person than any other gift could ever do. Just keep up the good work, it is appreciated more than you know.*
2006-06-21 06:37:16 · answer #7 · answered by cacysher 1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just simply being there is a wonderful thing for you to do for him. Be there for him to talk out how he feels, hold him, listen to him. Make it easy for him to go be with that sick relative, always have some food ready that can be packed up and taken in case you need to spend lots of time at hospital that sort of thing. He sounds like a very lucky guy to have somone as thoughtful as you.
2006-06-21 06:15:10 · answer #8 · answered by Uncle Tim 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
basically just don't let him b alone, talk 2 him a lot, spend as much time as u can with him, go out 2 eat with him, or watch a movie 2gether, inorder 2 make him feel that you'll always b by his side u have 2 stay by his side, sorry about his family member's health, goodluck.
2006-06-21 06:17:53 · answer #9 · answered by D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is let him know that he can talk to ya wheneva and be supportive of his emotions. Understand what is going on. Thats the best way you can help him. Dont make him talk to you. He will talk to ya when he is ready. But let him know he can come to you and trust me when he needs to or is ready to come to someone he will come around. But right now being understanding is the best thing and by being understanding that means understand he is greiving right now so he may not want to be bothered, he is trying to cope, and be understandin to the fact that right now he may be angry cuz when i lost someone i was filled with rage so be understanding to that and try not to sweat him with the small stuff he has enough on his plate.
2006-06-21 06:16:23 · answer #10 · answered by Im da Example 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him a night just the two of you and watch a movie cuddle just be there with him, for him, and make it about him. No right now sex is not the answer. better to say " I love you and will always be here for you" than " let's do it"
Good Luck and God bless
2006-06-21 06:15:55 · answer #11 · answered by ♥♥Soon to Be Mrs.F♥♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋