why parents compare their own kids with others kids and always like to say; see their kid going well, doing well in all aspect, have good job and what you doing? why parents are like this and why they compare?
2006-06-21 05:11:39 · 15 answers · asked by saKet 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I think parents do it trying to motivate their child, when in all actuality all it usually does is hurt the kid's feelings and rob them of their self esteem.
2006-06-21 05:15:00 · answer #1 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 6⤊ 1⤋
NO! NO! NO! It alone does not mean however that she is not a good mother. We make mistakes. It sounds however like she is making a terrible mistake. If you were my child, I would hope that you would tell me how it makes you feel. I would pick a random, non-emotionally charged moment, to ask her if you could talk to her for a minute. Tell her "Mom, I am not perfect, and I may not do things the way you might like, but when you compare me to other people - it makes me feel bad- it does not make me want to be more like that person that you are comparing me to. " Try to appeal to her heart. If she is a decent mom, she should feel bad for making you feel bad. Tell her you need her to support you, not make you feel bad for being you. Then......I know this is the hard part, but.....you need to consider if you have done anything at all (maybe you haven't done anything-but normally it's takes two to tango) that has caused your mom to be so down on you. Most times it's because we've been disappointed in something our child has done wrong and sometimes it's because we are stressed about something else entirely. Either way, it is wrong. Consider what maybe you can contribute to help her not be so hard on you. What she is doing is wrong, but will only be fixed with communication and it's your job to tell her. Remember- don't attack her- that'll just cause a fight, appeal to her good nature-hopefully she has one. If you do talk to her, I sure would like to know how it turns out.
2016-03-26 23:55:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i don't think they should say it out loud cause yes it will hurt the feelings of the child or maybe the parent. Some people just raise there children different and some parents just let there kids run all over them.
2006-06-21 05:16:55 · answer #3 · answered by geminigurl2404 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal for a parent to want their kids to be better. So to help make it happen, they tell the kids how other kids are better than them. Believe me, I had it for most of my life. It's not right, but it's something parents do. Try not to take it to heart. I finally learned not to. Of course if it hurts you, I would tell your parents. Communicate how you feel. That way they will understand.
2006-06-21 05:16:14 · answer #4 · answered by fran c 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My dad compared me to my brother and sister b/c they did good in school but I had a lot of trouble. It wasn't b/c I was not smart but I had a learning disability. well anyways I was always be compared to them. I guess they just want to the best for you and I guess if they insult you enough then they think that it will make you do better.
2006-06-21 05:17:54 · answer #5 · answered by crazybutterfly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
parents feel that if they compare their children with other kids their kids may develop competitive spirit and may score well in their examinations but this has a reverse effect on the kids as they feel that their parents don't love them anymore or they do not care for them.
2006-06-21 05:42:01 · answer #6 · answered by cute_manasi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if a parent is goin to compare their kids with other kids who are doin well, then they need to start comparing themselves with those kids parents to see what those parents are doin that they arent.
2006-06-21 05:16:33 · answer #7 · answered by baby_luv 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because they hope their kids will be the best in everything they do. But in fact they just want that their kids don't make the same mistakes they did in their life.
2006-06-21 05:16:27 · answer #8 · answered by iulia_nne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because it is an ego issue for the parents and truly has nothing to do with the kids at all. It's the same as saying my house is bigger than yours, my car is faster, I make more money, etcetera. It's bragging and one-up-manship.
2006-06-21 05:15:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because people always want what they do not have.Parents do not do that, no one should ever live in the shadow of another person. And no kid is a perfect angel.If you want to motivate your children, give them all the opportunties to be better.
2006-06-21 07:40:43 · answer #10 · answered by mango 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋