How do you overcome feeling worthless?

Question

I feel like a total loser. I had to give up a job paying $100,000 yr. because I fell pregnant unexpectantly and couldn't deploy to the region the job was at. I love my baby more than life itself and I'd die for her, but I'd give anything to give my family more. I can't find another job straightaway because my husband is in the Army and we are due to move in less than a month, and will have to set up house in a brand new area. I just feel so worthless like I let my family down by being at home and not making any money. I have no idea how to get over this feeling, even though my husband says he's happy with me and my kids love me. I just want to die.

Answer 1

Just reading your question you sound like a wonderful person..first you gave up a good job but your priority was your baby (who you love more than life itself) and your husband is happy with you and your kids love you..couple of questions?..has it been very long since you had your baby?..could you be suffering from post-partum depression?..Could you just be depressed?..Please talk with your doctor about your concerns..So much about our lives today are busy and as women we are caregivers. We ignore our needs. Your feelings and thoughts may be a chemical imbalance in your brain (you have no control of) often just talking with a mental health clinician can help you pinpoint why you have those feelings and how to re-direct them or change your focus..Be happy (I know how simple this sounds) Sometimes the money becomes the focus and it doesn't let you see how important your family and your life is..I wish you the very best.. Let this new move be a new start for you and your family..sounds exciting but busy...

Answer 2

I can understand that you are a little depressed

about your situation, but don't allow

materialistic things rule your life. Right now you

don't have a grip of your life, you are allowing

depressing to take over. Look at it like this, you

can't go back and change the pass, move on

with you your life. Don't get stuck in the "if I

would have". Life still has to go on, you have a

husband and children that really loves you no

matter what. Learn how to make due with

what you have until you are settled in another

place. My husband was in the military and I

could not find a job for nothing in the world. But

I learned how to really budget our money, and

took control of our spending. Sometimes in life

you have to do what you have to do, especially

by being a mother. Just know this, your

situation will not always be the same. My

situation is not. You are not worthless and you

did not let your family down, please don't

believe that lie. You can choose to believe a lie

or the truth. The truth is you are not a loser

just because you had to give up a $100,000 yr

job due to your pregnacy. What would make

you a loser would be if you were not a mother

to your child or children. You nurtured and

carried your baby and delivered. You may have

given up something, but you gained someone

very special and loving and that is a part of

you and your husband. You have to learn how

to look at your situation totally different.

Please stop looking at your situation the way

you are looking at it right now, because you

will only drive yourself into a deeper depression

state. You have a family that needs you and

most importantly love you. You are still in the

ball game, but now you just have to use

another stategy. Just because you have to wait

does not mean that you wont be able to

provide for your family. You are not worthless,

you are a wife, mother, daughter, cousin,

sister, niece, grandaughter, friend. Cheer up

and roll with the puches of life even if you think

that you made a mistake in life.

Answer 3

Stop looking at life and productivity as only venues for making money. Money is not everything in life, and even if you could make $100,000 a year, your neighbor might make $300k, will that make you feel worthless too?

The only way to not feel worthless is to give yourself worth. You have a loving supportive family, and not many people have that, and many people would gladly give up a well paying job for a slice of happiness and family. You are (I assume) a capable and dedicated human being and are capable doing much with your life. Try doing things with your kids, or maybe do some volunteer work. Something to keep you busy and productive without the need of money.

Happy families can be made on people who live on welfare even, all that matters is if you have the heart and dedication to the ones you care about.

Money is simply means to an end.

Answer 4

Sweetie, you might be suffering from depression. Get yourself checked. Every once in a while, I do get feel down and extremely useless and unwanted as well. People never see it because like you, I am outwardly happy-go-lucky and optimistic person. But after moping around for a bit, I go and do something, anything. I listen to my favourite music, hang out with my friends, anything - it'll make you feel so much better and take your mind off of your problem. If your friends think you're worth hanging around with, then clearly you are. Do something - volunteer, get a job, it'll make you feel useful. Trust me, if you feel useless and do nothing about it, you will be useless. That feeling should be your motivation to get up and change the way you feel about yourself. Good luck! :)

Answer 5

Dear sad one,
*hugs* i feel for you.
A mother is such an important job to do.
do u know what a mother is? How important she is!
"i just wanna die?"
baby, ur kids love you! and u love them. u should never think about death!
be the best mum the kids will ever have.
take it easy treat yourself to a bath or a relaxing massage because u deserve it
u have no reason to beat yourself up like this!
:) my darling, i pray for you and hope u feel 100% and no silly thought okay!
kind regards,
kiss2envy!
*hug*

Answer 6

Avoid the floccinaucinihilipilification of the effect of a baby on your life. Some things in life are worth more than money...

Answer 7

I know how you feel! Sometimes life happens! Maybe this move will do you a world of good. If not, I suggest seeking medical help! Best of luck!

Answer 8

Are you kidding?

I think you're GREAT... You need to see your life as HALF FULL rather then HALF EMPTY.

Isn't your child worth 100K a year?

and... you'll be back in the working world.. if you want to... soon.

Answer 9

yo don't think like that. that baby is a gift from God. just cherish it. if you kill yourself, you'll leave behind people who love you. you will get a second chance. just talk to people who are positive. if you have any suicidal thoughts: call 212-673-3000.

Answer 10

Go volunteer at a nursing home! You will feel much better!