What's your favourite joke?

Question

Don't be afraid, just post the funniest joke you've ever heard...

Answer 1

Arkansas 12th Grade Reading Test

No.1

M R DUCKS
M R KNOT
O S A R
C M WANGS
L I B
M R DUCKS

No.2

M R SNAKES
M R KNOT
S A R
C M B D I's
L I B
M R SNAKES

No.3

M R MICE
M R KNOT
S A R
C M E D B D FEET
L I B
M R MICE

No. 4

M R FARMERS
M R KNOT
S A R
C M M T POCKETS
L I B
M R FARMERS


Aproved by Senator Hillary Clinton
2004

Answer 2

Lesson to be learned from typing the wrong email address:
A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a
particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they
spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was
difficult to coordinate their travel plans. So, the husband left Minnesota
and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following
day. The husband checked
into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an
email to his wife.
However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and
without realizing his error, sent the email.
Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from
her husband's funeral. He was a minister who was called home to glory
following a heart attack. The widow decided to check her email expecting
messages from relatives and friends.
After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted. The widow's
son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the
computer screen which read:
To: My loving wife
Subject: I've arrived Date: April 6, 2006
I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here
now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I've just
arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared
for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then. Hope your
journey is as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. sure is freaking hot down here!!!!!

Answer 3

A Hobbit, a Dwarf and a Munchkin enter a pub, walk up to the bar and say "We'd like to order a beer!" The bartender stares wildly into space and says "Begorrah, I'n hearing things!"

(He can't see them, under the counter.)




LAUGH, OR I'LL TELL IT AGAIN !!!





(The last part is my favorite joke.)

Answer 4

Q. What's the difference between a parking attendant and a sperm?
A. A sperm has a 1 in a million chance of becoming a human being!

Answer 5

Ten men and a women hang on to a rope from a great height. One of them has to leave the rope and sacrifice his or her life or the rope might break and they all will die. The lady offers to sacrifce her life and gives a speech about how women are so compelled to sacrifice everything for their family and so on.The ten men are so touched that they clap for her.

Answer 6

A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, then he orders the bartender to prepare another double martini. After he finishes that, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring him another double martini. The bartender says, "look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis all night long, but, you gotta tel me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill." The customer replies, "I'm peeking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, I know it's time to go home!!!!!!!!:)

Answer 7

Q: what did the lepper say to the prostitute ?
A: Keep the tip !

Answer 8

the teacher asks a student
teacher: how many siblings do you have.
student: i have two siblings,both are guys
teacher: i have two DAUGHTERS, both are GIRLS

Answer 9

A man walks into a bar......

Ouch.

Answer 10

they are kinda dum