I am currently shopping for an afterlife benefit packages, necessities include cable, heated pool and or Jacuzzi, some distance away from Jesus, i hear he can be a real party pooper..doesn't need to include 72 Virgin, i'm a women i prefere shopping center..and im not a fan of white carpet so i would prefer not to be floating on a cloud. streams of milk and honey can attrack flies, you can minus that also..so if you hear anything let me know..
PS..hell isnt an option..my cell phone doesnt pick up signals below sea level..
2006-06-20 13:28:25 · 19 answers · asked by MotherNature 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
LOL....thank you...that really made my day...and um that wicca thing sounds really nice..its like a nice dream..only without cable,,which i need...so ill just adjust that a bit,,
2006-06-20 13:42:19 · answer #1 · answered by Black 3 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Have you considered reading about some of the different relilgions of the world then seeing which resonate with you the best(books are just guidelines no religion is set in stone) then it may be wise to pray to what ever your higher power iis wether male female or unisex and asking this higher power to guide you to the religion that is right for you also you may find some different rituals that are in books and customize them to fit you which is ok as long as you harm none or yourself the more simple the ritual the better because you do not have to read from a book and spirit can guide you the main thing is that when you come across others that have different paths than your own it would be wise not to criticize them and when others try and criticize your path remember that these are small minded people the real thing to remember is this a town can be approached from many different ways but the main thing is that the destination is the town there are as many different paths as there people and we all are just travlers on this journey that are trying to find our way home Heaven and hell have been written about so much that it is kind of absurd of in a way some have used this as a leverage tool(to manipulate others to do what the people have desired and others have used these things as a reward and ;punishment system)the main thing I feel like should be pointed out is this you have time in this life how much I don't know but if you will try and live each day to the best of your ability and to live as honorably as is possible then when you walk to the day of quiet(cross over,die) then all will be taken care of hope this has helped
2006-06-20 13:46:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jesus said the meek will inherit the earth is that good enough.
forget shopping center Isaiah says you will build your own house grow your own food. So you will be busy.
If you felt good you would love to be busy.
Nothing would be more boreing than floating on a cloud.
fOn your lot you can have anything you want.
So don't get a cow or bees. Plant fruit and nut trees.
2006-06-20 13:35:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol what a cute question. i thik wicca would be right for you. also instead of cable you'll have beautiful dreams, jesus isn't really around, heated hotspring instead of jacuzzi, a green grass carpet, and i'm not sure about the milk and honey.
in wicca when you die you'll live within a beautiful "garden" sort world. along with the goddess, you shall live eternally beside nature
2006-06-20 13:34:08 · answer #4 · answered by god 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Color me surprised. A skeptic searching for answers that are comfortable, rather than true. Who'd o' thunk?
P.S. Why do skeptics think that humor (or the attempt) is a rebuttal to any truth claims? What exactly is the thought process?
"Der, if I'm funny enough, other people will agree with me."
Sorry, I can't oblige. Besides, you're not that funny.
2006-06-20 13:34:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You mean you haven't heard of the Sacred Heart of Bellagio yet??! It's only a stone's throw from Caesar's Palace... where the 72 virgins are now playing.
Hey, their brunch is out of this world!!
Hahaha!
2006-06-20 13:52:58 · answer #6 · answered by Arf Bee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You ever heard of paying the piper -- maybe you might consider the pre-pay option and do your work down here first.
2006-06-20 13:31:22 · answer #7 · answered by swdMO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
THE ONLY 'AFTERLIFE' BENIFIT WORTH STRIVING FOR IS HEAVEN!
So get over you're earthly demands. If you are Christian, then earthly goods shouldn't matter if you're with the Lord God!
2006-06-20 13:31:29 · answer #8 · answered by iamtiffy606 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL, I think you're going to have to create your own religion! Best question of the day.
2006-06-20 13:30:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you want have a cell phone the heat will have melted it...
2006-06-20 13:31:01 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋