How would you feel...?

Question

How would you feel if your mother told you that she well no longer support you in anything that you do from this point on. Im 21 yrs old and me and my mother havnt been in the best of situations thru out my life . She was all I had growning up and for her to tell me this it hurt me more than anything ever. I know she ment it, she wasnt just saying it. This is the worst thing my mother has ever said to me in my entire life. Just like every other person we have our ups and downs expecially these past 2 weeks but, Why do you think she said this to me so coldheartedly . Even when I told her how much this hurt me.

I work for a living and my mother does not support me. If anything I help her out. And once my mother it set in here ways there is no way shes changing. I was always told from a small child that your mother and father are the two biggest supports you'll ever need in your life so for my mother to say this to me it was like a stab in the ♥.

I just want my mother to accept anything that I choose to do with my life wether it be good or bad choices. Just in general support my desions that I make in my life. No matter what I do nothing is ever good enough for her and it drives me insane. I cant live my life the way she wants me to or ill never be happy . All I want her to do is accept what choices I make in life . Thats all I ask.. And she wont.!! I would never in a millon years tell my future children that I would never support them in the desions that they make. Thats the worst ever.

Answer 1

it would hurt me to know that she doesn't agree with me
everyone always needs someone to support then
now, it isn't your mom anymore
it would be tough and i''ve had to deal with stuff like that
i know it hurts like hell and it is so hard to even live
but it always turns ok in the end
everything happens for a reason
so i'm sure you'll be ok
just give it some time and pray to god
i'll pray for you too
i hope you'll be ok but i'm sure you will be
remember you got all of us to talk to
you got the whole world to tell things to
take advantage
if u ever need help, we're all here
u r goin through some hard times
but everything will be ok
good luck with life
i'll pray for you!
have a nice day! : ) and feel better

Answer 2

Support you in what way?? If it's financially, it sounds like it's time to fend for yourself. You are of a legally responsible age and probably quite capable of earning your own way. If your mom has raised you by herself and without financial help from your dad, believe me, she has made many a sacrifice to see that you have had everything you need. It can be difficult raising children on your own, and just as difficult to communicate to them that it's time they support their self, financially. Some parents will hint and the kids don't get it. Sometimes it takes a blatant out and out statement. It may seem hurtful at the time, but it may be something that needs to be said.

I don't KNOW that this is the case, but it's entirely possible. Get a job, and your own place, and I'm sure your mom will be more than supportive of your efforts, emotionally and supportively (but not financially). Moms are there for you and love you, even when they say things you need to hear.

I remember that my mom and I got along a lot better, once I was no longer at home. I was able to appreciate her for herself, instead of who I thought she was supposed to be, and what I thought she was supposed to do.

It sounds like you've both had a tough time, but cut her some slack. She's the reason you've made it this far in life. I'm sure she'll be there for you, but she wants to know that if something happens to her, that you will do OK in life. She probably wants you to be independent, so she can breathe a little easier, knowing you can take care of yourself.

Tough love is just that. It's tough. But you'll live, and live well. Take a deep breath. Know that you are loved (if humans don't, God most certainly does). And go forward. It may be a good thing.

I wish you the all best.

Answer 3

interesting, my mother said some HORRIBLE things to me. Things that spoke volumes and she never supported ANYTHING I ever did my entire life.

She called me a whore and an alcoholic and told me the only reason girls go to college is to drink and have sex (I have an engineering degree, so what do you think I was doing in college?) She also told me to get a sex change because only men could be engineers.

After 29 tumultuous years with this woman as my "mother" I cut her out of my life and no longer talk to her. DNA does not forego being loving and caring. And just because we are blood doesn't mean I am required to have her in my life.

I'm not saying this is the response you need to take, but I couldn't handle her negativity anymore, and now she can't say hurtful mean things to me anymore! (and my life has been so peaceful ever since, I would never change a thing!)

Answer 4

maybe she told you this because she feels its time you branched of and took on some responsibilities for your self. maybe you have relied on her too much and far too long. you dont say if you are working or if you are studying. cause this could play a big part in this to. if you are not working maybe its a kick you need to start looking and earning your own money. you may feel she is hurting you. or being nasty but believe me no matter how much it hurts you will thank her in the end. mums are there to make life better for you. and if your mum didnt think you were capable alone she would never suggest this..please take care.

Answer 5

Sounds like me and my mom. Unfortunately you really don't get over the hurt. You just try to find other positive things to make your life better. Once your mother sees that you are doing just fine without her support then she will be the one feeling hurt.

Answer 6

She may be playing the tough love card. This happened to me. You must keep your head high and use the pain to succeed in life. Maybe one day she will come around! My mother did about 6 months ago. Sure we still have issues but she is back in my life! And when I asked her she admitted to playing that card!

Answer 7

People often say things they dont mean without thinking. Let her delve on what she said. If she knew she hurt you, hopefully she will apologize. Maybe she is just trying to teach you a valuable lesson abour life. If you know she really does care about you, her intentions are good or she said something brashly and will regret it later. Dont hold it against her

Answer 8

She is letting you know that you are an adult and from now on you can do whatever you want, but she won't support your decesions. So its up to you to do whats right and not worry about what yoru mother thinks, unless you agree wiht her and think she is right.

Answer 9

yea mate well you are 21 but its still harse for you mum to say that to you maybe you should sit down and lay it all out on the table so that you to can know were you stand then maybe you will have a better understanding of were your mum comming from

Answer 10

I would try to talk to my mom and see why she feels this way and try to work things out. Life is soooooo short it's best to work on relationships with your parents because they will not always be around.