How can you get a 7 year-old to help clean the house?

Question

My boyfriend has a seven year-old and we have a hard time getting him to help us clean up the house. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

How did your mom get you to help clean house?

You make it a job that he is responsible for and reward him with VERBAL praise - not money....I still don't get paid to clean house - do you?

Bring him on-board with you guys - tell him you need his help and then tell him what a great job he did at the task you gave him...
If dad helps that would be a great motivator as well. Once he has mastered one task you tell him how grown up he is and ask what he would like to do from a list of choices ( since he now so mature and such a great helper)

teamwork will work and 7 year olds still want to please the people they love so let him know how happy it makes you....

Answer 2

My children are 11, 7, 5 and 2. Even my 2 year old helps to pick up toys while we sing a cleanup song. At her age, it's a fun game. It can sometimes be a chore getting my 5 & 7 year olds to help out but their participation or lack of indicates how many privileges they have. Like they can only play the PS2 or Gameboy, watch tv, etc. when their rooms are clean. At the same time I have to set a good example by not sitting on the couch or at the computer when the house is a mess. It's good discipline for me too.

Answer 3

Lots of good ideas. Making it fun helps but by 7 he's probably not going to buy that one.

Do it together. Turn off the TV and be firm (don't yell) about what needs to be done and exactly what you expect. If he isn't used to doing chores, statements like "dust the furniture" doesn't mean much. Demonstrate, then supervise, then give feedback for a job well done.

Leverage - "we can go to the park (or insert activity) as soon as all the toys are picked up."

Discussion - he's old enough to understand that keeping a house for a family is a lot of work and everyone needs to do their share. Tell him, and do it as a family. If dad isn't behind this, your efforts will be a waste.

Patience - He already knows chores aren't fun so just keep redirecting him back to the task at hand with as little fuss as possible. I remember one night putting my 10 year back in front of the sink for dishduty 5 times! Then I had to send her back to wipe the table. I stayed calm, she grunted, but I never had to go to that much trouble again.

You can also try a reward chart. They do this in school and a lot of kids love it. Lists chores and put stars up when they are completed. So many stars buys a reward. The reward can be anything that motivate him (every kid is different) but could be extra tv or video game time, an ice cream, or money. Milestones (like a great week) could have bigger rewards, like maybe a daddy and son afternoon.

If he's really stubborn, you may just have to take away all the fun stuff an make him earn them back.

There is great software out called Easychild (easychild.com) that computerizes the reward chart system. I think you can try it for free, but pen and paper works well too.

Avoid yelling and threats. It usually just creates a war no one will win.

Answer 4

Make it fun, and rewarding. Come on, if we all get real, we'll admit that even we don't WANT to clean the house.....why would a seven year old??
BUT of course, they need to learn just like we have that you need to keep a clean environment, and that we all have to do things we don't really want to do.
I have my five year old vacuum, because he likes it. Is there anything that the child might like to do? If not, then try to be creative. I have my son wash the base boards with a sponge, and reward him for every wall with a quarter. It didn't take him long to figure out that there are alot of walls, and he can get about five bucks. (I don't give him money for everything, because I want him to know that helping out around the house is a responsibility that is expected, not asked and paid for!!!)
If your child still refuses, then you might have to get tough for a little while. My son recently told me that he would not clean his room and that I couldn't make him. After some discussion about why it was important that he do as he was asked, and his continued refusal to do it, I removed every single item from his room. Everything except for the bed and blankets. I told him that if he was not willing to take care of the things that he has, he does not deserve to have them. Of course he instantly said that he would take care of things, but I told him he would need to earn them abck by showing that he was ready-- by doing chores and acting respectfully. He has been earning things back for over a month now, and he has turned his attitude completely around. It's been easy for me too, because he's not "in trouble." We can still go for ice cream, and spend fun time together. I also can reward him whenever I feel good about how he's acting by letting him choose something to get back. He helps out without being asked, and has learned not to expect something for it, because I have been careful to tell him that we help out because that is what is expected. NOt for money, not to earn toys, etc.
The rewards do help to get them into the habit though.
I hope that this helps.

Answer 5

Make it a game. My kids and I sing the clean up song while we clean and everybody has a ball. The best way to get children to do anything is to make it as fun as possible.

Answer 6

Offer to pay him a quarter for each completed chore, help him save his money in a clear container to watch his progress and at the end of the week take him to the store to purchase something with the money he earned and saved.

Answer 7

Make it a game, have one person be the king/queen of each room, the king/queen tells the other people what to do and there can be a new king/queen of each room. Good Luck!

Answer 8

She knows when the stereo is pumping......we are cleaning. Sometimes she will even make comments....."no mom.....please no music today"........so funny.

I would guess that I have scarred her for life as she will never enjoy DEF LEPPARD my cleaning music favorite EVER.

Peace

Answer 9

Reward him honey! Say you will give him a chocolate bar if he helps clean the family room, etc...After he cleans it, give him lots of praises. He will eventually associate cleaning with something good. In the future, it will be easier for you to get him to clean the house.

Answer 10

i got my son to help clean the house. he just keeps his room clean until he got older now he loves to dust and vacume. just make a game out of it. make it fun