can anyone help with my 4 year old?

Question

i am having really bad problems with her eating each day i give her a healthy breakfast (cheerios or wetabix) then at 12.00pm i make a sandwich ,beans on toast or something similar she refuses to eat it no matter what i do nothing works including ignoring and star charts at 4.00pm i make a proper meal and she still wont eat then it gets to about 6pm and she is jittery and manic and i have to give her cereal .
i am at my wits end i don't let her fill up on juice i don't feed her junk and i saw my gp who told me she will grow out of it .
Some people say not to give her the cereal at night but then she gets shaky and i don't want her to be hungry .
none of my other kids were like this and i would be grateful for any advice

beans on toast contains fibre she never has fried food and always has a vegetables and meat at 4.00pm loads of people eat beans on toast ?????

obviously some americans are answering this and haven't bothered to read it properly
beans on toast in the uk is NORMAL and yes of course i feed her fruit and veg americans do not have the monopoly on good childcare

Answer 1

From reading the other answers I'm sure its already been beaten into your head that this is just a phase, but I'm also sure that alone will not dissuade your fears about the damaging effect going hungry will have on your child. It sounds as though she eats a good breakfast which is a start but you did not say what time breakfast is so it may be that she is not hungry at noon. I would recommend pushing lunch back to 1pm and see if she eats then. Kids have a way of making it known when they are hungry. Your problem may be that the meal schedule you set out may be conflicting with her body's own schedule. Try not making anything for her until she asks for it. Just to make sure she is getting the proper nutrients though I would give her a children's vitamin supplement each morning. Your GP could recommend the best brand for her age. Also you could try keeping a notebook to record when she does eat or what time she says she is hungry. After a week or two you should see a pattern develop and can change her meal schedule accordingly. Good Luck

Answer 2

First of all I have 6 children who all love beans (they are full of protien!) on anything, at any meal, and even request them. And beleive it or not I am an american. I had a similar problem with each of them. what I did is let them eat at the meal times, as much as they wanted within reason, and if they chose not to eat then they would wait until the next meal. However my 4 year old will get low blood sugar like her father and then becomes rough to be around. so i will give her some toast or a pice of fruit. Just hang in there she wont starve herself.

Answer 3

I have two children and I know how picky they can be. First off, I don't see any harm done with feeding her cereal at night. I suggest two things, 1st things first, make sure she's getting her nutrients, as long as she's getting her nutrients it doesn't necessarily matter where she gets them until she does grow out of this stage and I assure you she will. I would suggest giving her options. I would offer a apple, banana, and strawberries and/or fruit cups and make her choose. Take her around the kitchen and ask her what she would like even. It's possible she doesn't like the looks of the food... Make some mac n cheese and ask her to choose if she wants hot dogs in it or no hot dogs. I would let her make some choices and if that doesn't work, talk to your pediatrician. They may have some more ideas. You might even try some pediasure as well so that you at least know she's getting important vitamins and minerals that are assential for body and mind.

Answer 4

Try spaghetti on toast or get those spaghetti shapes or letters. Also an idea with the toast is to get some of those pastry cutters (like bear or animal shapes) and cut the toast out with them and Put them on the plate.
Another idea is to add cheese into the beans (cheesy beans on toast uuuuuummmm lovely - my mum used to give me that sometimes and it was nice).

If you make the meal look like fun, she might eat it. Also, do you eat with her at the same time. If not, might be worth doing this and eating the same as what she eats, then she can follow by example.

Making meals fun, helps the child to appreciate food more too. Another idea (before I go) is get her to help you in making the beans on toast (or cutting out the toasty shapes :)), by doing that, she may also be likely to want to eat what she herself has made.

:)

Answer 5

Do you give her some fruits or vegetables? My kids love can and fresh fruit, applesauce, yogurt, etc as a healthy snack. What about other types of cereal in the morning (ie..Wheaties, Rice Krispies, Life)?? What about oatmeal? No offense, but beans on toast sounds gross to me and I'm 30. So I would take her to the grocery store and see what she picks out. If she picks out something that you personally don't like, but she has to have it. I would say to her that the food item would be a special treat if she tries something healthy. I think that its okay to give her cereal, especially, if you pair it with some fruit. She will not remember what's going on now in twenty years, and she's not falling apart, so don't fret over it. I think that she would be okay.

Honestly, please do what is best for you and your child, only you know that answer. No one else,not even the doctor, knows what works for you and your family. Good Luck!! :)

Answer 6

This sounds really complicated. Most young children have different schedules. Look for signs of this such as waking in the middle of the night, etc. She is approaching the age where she will be soon starting school, and you need to prepare her. This means to show her that you decide what is best for her. Reward her greatly with a toy or kisses when she eats what you want, when you want. You shouldnt have to stress over her not eating cereal in the morning, you should pretend that it's okay. This may be a way for her to get attention.

Answer 7

Just my opinion, but if she likes healthy cereal, let her eat that. My kids go through eating phases like that. Most cereal is pretty good for them, so that wouldn't worry me too much. I know the ideal is to have them eating a variety of all foods from all food groups, but sometimes that doesn't happen all in the same day. So I would say, let her have cereal, and try to keep her healthy. If you make too big an issue of food, it can really blow out of proportion later in life. Good luck, eating issues can be a challenge.

Answer 8

I wouldn't eat beans on toast either. Try something like peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch. If you are worried about the sugar in the jelly there are low sugar brands. She will grow out of it. My 4 year old was like that when he was three now he has a big appetite. If this has only been going on for a week or so she may have a sore throat.

Answer 9

My son ate nothing but hotdogs for a year. I finally started to make food available 24/7. I always had raisins and fruits on the table and healthy nonfattening popcorn in a bowl on the table at all times. When he started to catch up on his size I became more insistant he eat with the rest of us. He did go hungry for a night or two but by day three he was eating with us. NOw he conforms and eat what we are eating. A 4 yr old will notice which buttons to push and will push them over and over again.

Answer 10

its tough to believe she will grow out of it and it may take a while my son is 13 and still a bad eater especially in summer. he is of average weight and size so is getting the goodness he needs from what little he is getting. i made sure he drunk at least 1.5pts of whole milk and he was eating plenty beg when he did eat. i discovered the bigger the issue the bigger the problem but he knows if no lunch no treats. the tantrums will go , you can try taking her the food shopping and let her pick what she wants for lunch and tea each night this worked in such away that he did eat but still not full portions or make mash potatoes fish fingers etc and make them like a train or her plate you know the type of thing i mean?? good luck and dont despair.