Why do they think they know more?

Question

I mean, why do people who spend 4 or even 8 years in school studying children think that they know more about children then the people who have first hand knowledge of raising a child? I had someone here tell myself and a lot of other parents that our answers were wrong and she knew this because she studied child psychology and education, yet had no children of her own? Wouldn't you think that experience and an open mind would be the better educator then sitting in a classroom?

Thank you everyone for your well thought out answers.

I agree that a balance is necessary and I will never say that I know things absolutely, I can only speak from experience.

Answer 1

I'm a parent and also an early childhood educator.

I prefer first hand experience over a text book definition any day.

You can always tell the ones who have children of their own to the ones who don't.

Teachers, educators, care givers, etc, with kids will still give you advice but they'll temper that advice with the thing they learned and what happened when it happened to them, their own life experiences.

Those who haven't any kids give text book answers like the text book is the bible.

The only thing you can do to change it is wait, the grandparents curse so to speak, they''ll have kids and then all those text book answers will change.

Answer 2

I have to disagree only a little. I worked for a mental health clinic for 10+ years, both before and after I had children. I am not a therapist, I was in administration. Before I had children, I thought these people who don't have kids yet, not even married yet, don't have a clue. These ideas they have sound real good on paper, but that's not real life. After I had kids, I still thought the same to some degree. After my oldest son hit about 2-3 years old, I had some questions about his behavior during certain situations. Our office was very friendly so I never uncomfortable talking about my kids. The two people who answered my questions the best (in my opinion) and also pulled out a ton of ideas were the two who did not have children of their own. They also didn't say that their answers were always 100% correct either. There has to be a balance of personal experience and educational knowledge. Just because this person who answered you is or did study child development doesn't make her the all time expert. Studying child development alone doesn't make her an expert. Experience in the field will make her better, but not perfect.

Answer 3

I think people who study children without having children only get half of the experience, because there is a difference between what *should* happen and what actually *does* happen. Just because one study shows that kids typically react a certain way to a particular situation does not mean that they will. Remember, in those studies there were kids who did not react in the "typical" way. Nothing is true of all kids all the time. Having said that, they do have knowledge that is valuable. But I'd like to see what kind of parent that person will turn out to be. Working with an actual kid is a lot different from reading a textbook.

Answer 4

I totally respect the fact that someone has gone to school for a good portion of their young adult life to be a professional. However, If that person were a true professional, they would know that everything is not "text". I don't care how many books you read - or how many classes you take -- until you have children of your own, there are not perfect answers.

Each child is different. My husband & I have been married for nearly 13 years and have 4 beautiful children - each of those children have completly different personalities.....I agree that reading books and taking parenting classes may help, but you can not base the ultimate answer from a page in a book.

Answer 5

I know just because your have a child BY no means at all dose that, means you know how to parent CORRECTly. I know also everything about being a parent can not be taught in a class or book, some things must be lived to truely understand. Some people are raising children who ARE CLUELESS as to what is best 4 the child. Some educated people are CLUELESS as to what to do in a real life child situation. It's not a black or white question errors are made by both people.

Answer 6

ah youth they do have ALL the answers.. no experience to back them up but a library full of text books with no variables and a predicted outcome....parenting is a hands on job .. you learn more within a year with a child then 5 years working toward a degree...they also lack something vital common sense......the classroom it made to give you a base from which to grow ... i'm still learning and older than most of the dirt around here too.........

Answer 7

Not necessarily. As with any subjects, when you study in school a certain subject, you get knowledge on the subject from thousands of people who did studies themselves, on the said subject. When you only have practical knowledge you usually have knowledge of, maybe, your mentor, if you had one (in this case your own parents) or what ever you learned by yourself by trial and errors.

Is one better than the other. I don't think so. Both have huge advantages.

Answer 8

no, because those 8 years are spent learning the inner-pscyhological workings of children. Raising a child will give you an understanding of your child's behavior, but unless you have the specific education you won't really know the how or why.

Answer 9

i think this is also true with people working for child protective agencies . they will say something your child does is not normal but your childs doctor will tell you alot of kids do the same thing . and alot of social workers do not have kids at all.
also what these people learn seems to change frequently . research will state that one thing is not normal then years down the line it will state it is .
i would pay no mind to someone who claims they know more about something when they themselves only go by text books .

Answer 10

I think both schooling and hands on help....however I do believe most moms do know more because of the hands on 24/7..and someone /anyone without kids have no clue what goes on nor do they have the right to tell you how you are wrong.