My boyfriend keeps tryin to get me to give him a bj. Its not that I won't its more like i don't know how and i don't know how to tell him that.
2006-06-19 17:30:11 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
dont do it if you feel uncomfortable
2006-06-19 17:32:43 · answer #1 · answered by Serendipity 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The key to the whole situation is to not let him have the control. If he feels that he can force you into something, then it won't end up well.
Say "I will when I am ready." Then wait awhile. At least a week (or until he forgets about it.)
When the time comes (if it does...) tell him flat out "I've never done this. So if it is horrible or something is wrong, please tell me how I can fix it."
Deep down, everyone knows that everyone has to have a first time for everything. He might pretend to be tough about it, but he'll understand.
Never let anyone push you into anything- especially sex. You need to be comfortable with it first, and if he really cares about you, then he won't mind waiting. (cliche but so true...)
good luck!
2006-06-20 00:36:50 · answer #2 · answered by sarahliz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If this something that you want to do..then don't feel self concious about your abilities... we are not born knowing how to do this..lol Just ask him to tell you what he wants and what he likes.. I can promise you he will not be shy in telling you how to do this... oral sex is one of the most intimate ways that we can share our bodies and emotions.. I would suggest that if you want technical advice, then seek out a site that will give you some instruction... this isn't the proper place to post that sort of info... there are young children who read these questions and answers. Peace.
2006-06-20 00:37:45 · answer #3 · answered by julianna76301 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want to do it..... then don't.
When it comes to sex the women is in control... sure the man initiates it, begs, pleads for it but the women has every right to say no.
Any man who truly loves you, would not ask you to do anything again and again that you have already said no to.... yes anything.
Just think of it the other way around... If you really wanted him to go do something for you and he said no, then you wouldn't keep asking him to now would you? You would feel as though your pressuring him into doing something he doesn't want to do. If you love someone you want to make them happy... And if your relationship isn't strong enough for him to take one no, then his not worth it.
2006-06-20 00:44:46 · answer #4 · answered by Jenni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are really in as secure and strong a relationship as one that involves sexual activity should be, then you should be able to talk to your boyfriend and explain your situation. He should understand and this can be something you work on together patiently.
Also, don't do it if you don't want to! He has no right to make you do something you'd rather not. Don't make a bad decision and regret it later. Take your time.
2006-06-20 00:34:22 · answer #5 · answered by Edith 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him you never did it before so it is not going to be the greatest thing he ever felt in his life, but you will get the rhythm to it if you just try it a few times. And if you are not ready, do not do it no matter how much you love him because if he really loved you he would understand.
2006-06-20 00:35:44 · answer #6 · answered by nicole24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm continually amazed at apparently how difficult it is for people in relationships to discuss sex honestly with each other. First of all, to be worthwhile, sex must be based on mutual gratification, not one person trying to indulge a fantasy at the other person's expense. The two of you should take some time, in a quiet and relaxed setting, to honestly discuss your relationship and the mutual gratification requirements of sex. Secondly, it seems to me that if your BF enjoys oral sex, he would lead by example. It may be because I'm considerably older than many of the participants in this online community, but for years I've believed that there's something in the female psyche that drives her to satisfy her man to the same extent or beyond that he satisfies her. I believe the "time bomb" in this relationship of yours is revealed in the following phrase: "My boyfriend keeps trying to get me to give . . .You see, if he's trying to get from you, he's not concerned about your desires, but his own alone.
This attitude will eventually surface in other aspects of this relationship, not just sex.
My final word: Be careful! Whatever you decide, give because you want to, not because he wants to "get."
2006-06-20 06:50:50 · answer #7 · answered by mcjordansr 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Normally, you BF will understand you if you don't really wanna it...BJ is a good way of flirting at the beginning, but not all...
2006-06-20 01:22:11 · answer #8 · answered by Push 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Like that is real romantic to think of getting him off without you having any satisfaction. What comes next sharing you with someone else?? That is not romantic and you are supposed to have a romance not be a hot wet spot to shove his worm.
2006-06-20 00:33:11 · answer #9 · answered by mr conservative 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I felt the same way! You just have to go in there and do it. I know it's embarrassing to ask for help, but, trust me...if you do it, he won't shut up about it. It's actually very easy. If you guys are young, anything will feel good to him anyway =)
2006-06-20 00:33:41 · answer #10 · answered by tortasinqueso 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well. first never do something you don't want to do or feel bad about doing. but if u want to and don't know how. well thier is actually classes fro this kinda thing. or ask a best girl friend. and the best one is ask him. i am most defeniently sure he would be happy to show u how.
2006-06-20 00:33:37 · answer #11 · answered by family_wright2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋