My daughter is very jealous of her baby sister?

Question

My 3 year old daughter is very jealous of her 7 month old sister. She can be mean to her at times, even physical. Did anyone have this problem and how did you remedy it?

Answer 1

This is a common problem, and does NOT call for punishment. You've probably figured out that your older girl is afraid that she is losing you to her little sister, and that makes her act out in ways that show her anger directly to the baby. Not good. You need to do two things. First, find a way to include your older daughter in some way of taking care of the baby. It may be as simple as "helping" rock the baby. Make sure you praise her when she does this. Second...you need to make time to spend some special attention on your older girl, just you and her. I'll bet you know something she especially likes to do...find a way to share that with her, and create some "Mommy only does this with me" time. If you do these things, she will begin to feel needed and special again. I know you love both your girls, make sure they have a head start at loving each other. Best wishes, and get some rest yourself, Mom.

Answer 2

Try spending some alone with her - just the two of you. My daughter was jealous of my son years ago - but I realized that he getting most of the attention. I then started planning stuff for just us to do - go to the movies, shopping, etc.. (if you have someone to watch your 7 month old). If not, maybe let her stay up a little later in the evening and do fun things together - watch a movie, play games, etc... I think there will always be a little jealousy between siblings.

Answer 3

YOu might have to make time for you oldest daughter...just you and her time. If you are spending more time with the baby than your oldest than that might be why she is jealous. But Children do recover from having siblings take their "baby position" away. Just spend time with your oldest...or let you oldest help with small little tasks when it comes to the baby...have her get you a diaper if you need one for the baby...or get the baby a toy or something...make her feel useful and needed. I have a 2 1/2 year old son and a 2 month old son..it was rough going for a while...but things are getting better.

Answer 4

Try to have them do things together with you and them two. She might be felling like you have been giving the baby all of your attention and not enough to her treat them equally. Don't separate them let them play together under your supervision unless the 3 year old wants to play by herself once in a while let her and keep the baby away and let her have some alone time to play but not all the time. If you have to spank her butt a little. good luck

Answer 5

I was so jelouse of my brother when he was born that i sat in his basenet and swing and broke them. I would try to push him off my moms lap. And even told her to send him back!! All you can do is be pateint. Talk to her. She may only be 3 but she will understand u. My neice is 4 now and her sister is 4 months. She understood and stoped. Tell her i know mommy spends lots of time with the baby right now but thats becuase she can do it on her on. I had to do the same for you but now you are a big girl and mommy needs your help. When she gets bigger mommy will not have to do this.

Answer 6

Yes that is a very common difficulty in families. The best option is to get your three year old into some sort of activity with kids her own age, such as dance...or lil gymnast's. Another solution is to get them to do some more things together without you, such as painting, and kareoke. They will sort out, but she needs to see the benefit of not being a baby anymore first.

Answer 7

i'm dealing with a similar situation now- my girls are almost 5 and almost 2 and fight- constantly!!! what i'm doing that has seemed to help is to set aside special mommy time for my older one- like going to the movies or her favorite store in the mall- even the park and then after wards we come home and do something together with my younger one and it seems to help my older one feel more important because while were out i tell her that i always appreciate all her help with her baby sister and tell her how important it is that she's such a great big sister- things like that. i hope this continues to work for me and as well you- take care

Answer 8

Yes, I had this problem with my children.
Here's what I did.
I explained to the older one that the younger sibling "belongs to you".
And I gave him a specific responsibility (making sure she had warm feet)
The way I figured it, the older one was an only child up until the younger one came along, and he was probably feeling territorial, so by telling him the baby was his, it resolved those feelings.

Anyhow, it worked pretty well, but there will always be some sibling rivalry between them.

Answer 9

kids often feel left out if they were once the only child and think they now have someone to compete with for attention. They feel they are less wanted when a baby comes into the home with it's needs as a baby you have to fill the baby's needs rather than spend time with her.

Answer 10

omg my oldest brother used to try and kill my other brother when he was born (only a year apart..) just try to give them both equal attention, and first borns(ecspecially girls) get very jelous because they arnt pampered as much...just be fair to both and if your 3yo wants a little more attention dont ignore her because your too busy with your other daughter, just say that you just have to finish up here and go over and talk with her or see what she was doing afterwords. try and fit time in with her and her sister and do somethings alone, show her that she wont be ignored just because of her sister. and if you have to ever cancel quality time ALWAYS!!!!! try to make it up during the week or even the next day. children are very sensative to that.