My 12 year old wants me and her to go and spend a day out by ourself. The only problem is I have 2 other children. I don't feel like that would be fair. What should I do?
2006-06-19 12:51:30 · 34 answers · asked by cheryla2006 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It sounds like your 12 year old wants to spend some quality time with you. There is nothing wrong with that.
After you have your day out, do the same thing with the other two. I'm sure they would appreciate some one on one time as well.
Have a good time!
2006-06-19 12:55:48 · answer #1 · answered by Jennifer R 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, how old are the other children? If they are young then it wouldn't really be a big deal . Your oldest girl seems to need you right now. It could be that she feels she isn't getting enough time with you and wants to get you away from the others. Also, she is at that age where she is going through some major changes and she needs her mom. She might just want to chat and have fun and this would give you both a chance to talk about anything you need to. If you still feel that it would be unfair to the other children, then set two other days aside to spend with each of them. That way every one gets alone time with mom and it's fair. And it doesn't matter if they are boys or girls because each child needs some time where they can talk to you about whatever is on their mind. Besides it's fun to go out with just one child for the day and be able to do things that you couldn't do with all three of them arguing and fighting over what they want to do.
2006-06-19 13:00:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on how old the other kids are. Twelve is an age where parent-child relationships are extremely important, and you should jump at any opportunity you can to strenghten it. So yes, take him/her without a doubt alone for the day to spend some quality time alone. If the other two mind, take both of them or each of them seperately and do something else fun for a little while, like swimming or bowling. Or, have you spouse or a relative take them and do something fun while you two are out.
2006-06-19 12:56:37 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's definitely fair, just as long as you spend a day out with each of your other kids too. My parents do it all the time, and even though my sister and I have been known to fight over rediculously trivial things we definitely both are fine with our parents spending a day with the other one.
It's especially good if you can think of something that the two of you want to do that the other kids aren't interested in. Like if you have one girl and two boys, take the girl shopping, and and the boys won't want to go anyway, or things like that. Cause I know when my parents spend the day with my sister at a horse show or stuff I'm not at all jealous cause I wouldn't want to be there anyway.
But yeah, most parents do things with just one of their kids sometimes.
2006-06-19 12:58:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is very fair, give them all one day. If the 12 year old is the only girl, then you really need to spend some time alone with just her. However I think it's a good idea to give them all special one on one time.
2006-06-19 12:56:07 · answer #5 · answered by April c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you should explain to your 12 yr old that you have 2 other children and that would not be fair to just spend time with that one child one on one and that the other 2 will feel left out.
2006-06-19 12:55:31 · answer #6 · answered by mz_u_dont_know_me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure why not. They're probably not all the same ages and each of them will require a different amount of time and have different interests. That's great that your 12-yr old does want to spend time with you because the teenage years are going to becoming and it'll be better if you have a closer relationship. Just be sure to spend one-on-one time with each of them so they're not left out!
2006-06-19 12:56:43 · answer #7 · answered by chariot804 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No children need time alone with each parent. Kids need to feel special as an individual, not always as a group. This also gives you the chance to do something that only that child likes. It will be a great experience. Have fun!
2006-06-19 12:55:42 · answer #8 · answered by Cola 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think its fair I think you should spend alone time with all of them if you can! 12 year old girls need there moms I think its a great idea take her out to dinner just the tow of you and do the same with the others next time
2006-06-19 12:54:45 · answer #9 · answered by brenda4ever 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is important to make each of your children feel special. If you are able to, take each of them some where by themselvs. You will get to know your children on a more personal level. Your child may even share some important things he or she may be going through. You may even get blessed from spending time with each of them individually. I think it is important to spend time with this one child who is asking because it means alot to this child. Please dont make money or time the issue. Iam sure your time is all that matters to your children not where you go or where you eat or what you even do. Just listen and love you family.
2006-06-19 13:25:16 · answer #10 · answered by Nickerbockers 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋