My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year and a half. We recently moved in together. We have a great relationship and have been making plans to get engaged. However, there is an issue that makes me hesitant to take this next step. My boyfriend still has a nanny (he will be 22 this year). She is constantly interferring in our relationship. For example, she finalizes our travel plans if we vacation anywhere, where as I would feel more comfortable doing this myself. Furthermore, she even went so far as to call my parents after she had done this, to make sure that they knew where we were going. She also goes so far as to pick out the toothpaste we use, buy my boyfriend more underware, and other things of this nature. I'm not sure how to bring this up to my boyfriend without offending him. know this is more of an issue between my boyfriend and his parents, but is there anything I can do in the meantime? Thanks!
2006-06-19 11:20:29 · 12 answers · asked by Honeypie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
That is pretty crazy... I am 22 and I definetly dont need a nanny. But here is the problem, he likes having her or he would have already said something. To me, and apparently his parents can afford it, he wants a nanny because he likes her and likes to be babied. If you get rid of the nanny (through whatever means) he will expect you to make up for it by babying him. By the way you write you seem like an intelligent girl, Im not sure why you would be in a relationship like that. If its just because he has money (which it also seems like) then get rid of him. Other than that, at age 22, you will not change him for the better.
2006-06-19 11:32:50 · answer #1 · answered by zw88 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who is this Nanny a girlfriend? Sounds like the nanny is like a personal butler. Is you boyfriend rich or something or his parent's rich? Sounds almost like the psychological problems that grow when children end up living with their parent's past the age of 30. Stop paying the nanny. If the nanny is a girlfriend/playmate on the side, then dump him and find a better guy like myself. Don't get married to him. I have talked with many and the age of 22 is not a good age to be settling down. We have such a high divorce rate here in this country. It's an epidemic. Be careful, please rethink this potential engagement/marriage. The age 24 is the age when most people have come to maturity with their life. He still has another 2 years at least before he has decided on what he wants and where the best place is to work and live. Give him more space. I don't know your age. If you are anywhere close, try to keep in mind that you are young and have plenty of time to do this later. It makes good financial sense too to wait until you are a little older before settling down. If you would like to get to know me, I'm 33, so I'm past that beginning maturity stage. I have knowledge and education too. A good choice! 5 Star*****
2006-06-19 11:33:52 · answer #2 · answered by scottsorgent 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like a 'personal servant' and it sounds like he's some kind of prince. Why, oh why, do I get the feeling that 'Leave father and mother' as in 'Leave father and mother, cleave to wife, become one flesh'(*) does not just apply to father and mother?
Bottom line: If you are already discussing engagement, you have the perfect entry to the subject, you can mention the content of this verse to him (either telling him where it's from or not), and ask him what he thinks that says about the situation with this nanny person. He ought to get the point (and I hope you already do).
2006-06-19 11:29:03 · answer #3 · answered by songkaila 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What! This sounds sick, sick, sick. Run as fast as you can and don't look back. Anyone over the age of 18 who needs a nanny..... How can you have a great relationship when someone who isn't even related to him keeps interfering in your life?
2006-06-19 11:27:03 · answer #4 · answered by smartypants909 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm yikes!I'm only 11 and my boyfriend stays home alone the best you can do is talk to your boyfriend and tell him how you feel!
If he agrees with you then maybe inquire to let go of the nanny then you guys won't have any problems!
2006-06-19 11:24:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to tell your bf that if he plans on getting engaged to u, he needs to know that REAL MEN DONT HAVE NANNY's....sorry, but its true. there is a difference between having someone to look out for you (a mother) and having someone hold your hand through life (a wife)...so it sounds to me like he is already married...to his nanny. but seriously tho, just tell him that it might be time to let go, and get serious.
2006-06-19 11:27:57 · answer #6 · answered by Bill B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a little disturbing. Does he take care of himself? And when she is gone will he expect you to pick up where she left off. I would explain to him that he is a grown man and it time to let her go. If he doesn't want to, I would see this as a look into the future of things to come.
2006-06-19 11:26:54 · answer #7 · answered by silent*scream 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell the nanny that he doent need a nanny AND HIM
2006-06-19 11:22:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Questions:
How old is the "nanny"?
Just what are her "responsibilities"?
Does she have a sister?
2006-06-19 11:42:24 · answer #9 · answered by profdave99 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her a raise and make her the maid!
2006-06-19 11:35:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋