If so, I have a very high regard for my father being a great father and role model. I'm 39 and never married also so I'm scared that my ideals are unrealistic and I'm expecting too much in a man??
2006-06-19 09:45:50 · 31 answers · asked by COblonde 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you should find someone that you love and feel connected with, no one is gonna be just like your dad, but chances are the one you decide to settle down with may have some similiarties to you dad but he may not be exactly like him.
Don't be so picky or you may end up alone, but don't be desperate and just be with anyone, make yourself a list of the most important qualities you need in a man and go with that.
Don't put too many 10 may ba good, if there are 50 things you need in a man no one will ever measure up.
2006-06-19 09:52:15 · answer #1 · answered by countrygrl278 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some girls probably do look to marry men like their dads - other girls end up marrying the opposite kind of guy. If you have a great father then it's a good thing to look for those qualities in mate.
Just because you are 39 and never been married doesn't mean anything. You should check your standards out - but if they are important to you then you shouldn't bend them. There is someone out there for you, and he's what you want. You should be aware that maybe he may be lacking a quality or two - no one is perfect. Keep an open mind and an open heart!
2006-06-19 16:49:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may seem that women form a dream of the perfect man around what ever best male role model that they grew up with. It may noy have been a Father. But it is unfair and very unrealistic to expect any man to follow in the footsteps, of the image that is ingrained in a young girls mind. It is a guideline or model, not a carbon copy. Each woman has a responsiblity to any potential suitors, to learn to appreciate that mans own unique, special qualities. Appreciate and be grateful for what he brings into the relationship. Hold the image of your Father, or grandfather, or whomever, with high esteem, if you wish. But make room for other great men to enfluence you in your future as well. They are also important for further healthy development in a woman's life.
2006-06-19 17:00:39 · answer #3 · answered by ocean_luvin_mermaid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if your 39 and have no prospects for marriage , I'm guessing you are right! if you wait for the ,as you call it " ideal man" lol.. you will have to wait forever. .... not to be rude( I'm trying to be honest) you are already getting to old to bear children. so maybe you should be more realistic in your expectations of men. i love my dad the most! big daddy's girl ( I'm 33) great man, wonderful father.... but my men have been nothing like my father, and i somehow think that's a good thing! get real, or be alone ... bottom line woman.
2006-06-19 16:54:01 · answer #4 · answered by pinksgirlfriend 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not want a father figure.
As to your ideals being too unrealistic... I think that we know better than to settle for someone who will not make us happy. I think we know that we'd rather be alone than marry a man just for the sake of being maried.
2006-06-19 16:49:20 · answer #5 · answered by brand_new_monkey 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that we look for certian qualities in our husbands that reflect that of our father.
I too am 39 and last year I married for the second time, but the last time. My husband has several qualities in him that my father has as well. My ex husband is absoultly nothing like my dad.
Good Luck to you!
2006-06-19 17:05:41 · answer #6 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually the father is the most constant male in the ladies life so it is natural to compare and even look for the similarities.
Guys do the same thing - they marry someone that is like their mother.
Granted there are exception in both cases. but look at the person that was the most constant (dad/brother for girls, mom/sister for guys) and you will find that the mate is more like them than not.
IMO
2006-06-19 16:50:55 · answer #7 · answered by guroo_jedi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My father died when he was 35 years old...
For years, I only dated men that were older than that...thinking they'd stick around for a while and wouldn't leave me like he did.
It's okay to expect a man to have the the same beliefs/morals/characteristics that your father has. Just know that he can't BE your father...
2006-06-19 16:55:07 · answer #8 · answered by dubbledee71 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is true of some women who have dads they really had a good life with. Others want to get as far away from the family tree as possible--because their dads were sons of witches. (Sometimes, though, even those women marry someone like their lousy dads).
2006-06-19 16:49:12 · answer #9 · answered by Terri C. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i swore i would never marry someone like my father, we never got along very well.
however, i married a guy very similar to my dad.
i like to think that he has the good qualities of my dad, but not the bad.
i don't think expecting too much from a spouse is possible. you want that person to spend your life with and everyone deserves a perfect mate. ( i said perfect mate, not person:)
try an online dating site...my uncle remarried in his 40's and they really are a wonderful match!!!! they met on an online dating site.
take care.
2006-06-19 16:54:00 · answer #10 · answered by joey322 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋