What is the difference between unschooling and not parenting?

Question

On a homeschooling message board a mother said she lets her children make decisions most parents wouldn't. They go to bed when they are tired, eat ice cream for breakfast, watch as much TV/play video/computer games as wanted, etc. All in the name of "unschooling." Where is the line? Don't children need bounderies? What happens when these children become teenagers? Can someone explain what unschooling is, and how in the world it is legal?

Answer 1

It is ill-conceived, at best. Children -- especially younger children -- need rules and boundaries, and to have common sense instilled into them. Ice cream for breakfast will not sustain their health when they become adults. It is my understanding that unschooling basically is letting your children do what they want, when they want, and leaving any semblance of a "curriculum" up to them. Yes, they may become proficient, even savants, in certain subjects, but it is almost guaranteed that they will come out of their experience with severe educational deficiencies. Some things, notably maths and harder sciences, are almost universally too difficult to be self-taught. While everyone ought to study some things based purely on interest, when one is young, one must also learn the basics to serve them in later life.

Answer 2

Homeschooling is largely like tutoring at domicile, no matter if by ability of a instructor or figure. Unschooling is permitting the baby aspects to study etc, yet also allowing them to choose what they prefer to do. in reality you provide them selections and they could do although they choose, no matter if or not they prefer to observe television etc. although that's amazingly controversial and notably relies upon on the figure and how they prefer to computer screen that.

Answer 3

I could understand letting a child choose their bedtime, as long as they get up at a set regular time everyday. I could maybe even see the ice cream, considering milk and sugar is all most breakfast cereals are these days. But play video games all day? That is not true unschooling, which is to allow children to follow their natural interests and discover things on their own.
My oldest was enthralled with spiders. He read material far beyond his grade level, shadowed a county entomologist, conducted his own experiments by timing how long it took a spider to "web-up" various types of insects. I encouraged this, BUT not to the exclusion of other schoolwork. Science videos? Sure. But just cartoons all day--that's not what it's about.

Answer 4

It sounds like she went over board taking the tradition out of school- unschooling that which is considered restrictive. Children need and want boundaries. It helps them learn personal limits. When the unschooling leaves the children endangered, that is not legal and becomes abuse.

Answer 5

I say as long as their is discipline, love, education and everyone is happy that is fine. Every family is different. Now if the kids just run wild and don't have respect for anyone that is different. All children need to be taught good manners, respect and how to behave properly. If Mom lets them have ice cream for breakfast it's ok for them, I wouldn't but that's me.

Answer 6

There are a lot of bad parents in the name of free spirits. I would think the main goal of raising a child is to prepare them to integrate into society as a full functioning being.

Answer 7

She isn't unschooling anything. She is just failing to set limits. That isn't home schooling. It is a really bad idea with really bad consequences. That is why I think home schooling is such a bad idea.

Somebody has to set limits or else kids don't know what the rules are. If they don't know what the rules are, they don't know how to socialize. That is the worst part about it. I don't think unschooling is legal. But if it were, then the board of education should rescind the mother's IEP.

Answer 8

Alas, stupidity often isn't illegal. I have heard of parents who let their kids decide their own boundaries (if you will) and although it may seem kewl to the parent at the time, I don't necessarily think they are doing the child a favor. The world has boundaries and a child raised without them is likely going to assume their parent(s) care nothing for them, AND will be in for a very rude awakening when they one day leave home and enter the big old world. Sounds more like a lazy parent to me (it's easier to say yes, than no).

Answer 9

i read the article about "unschooling" in a magazine. i don't understand if it works or if it don't. the one girl in the article did go on to Harvard...all i could think of was she must have been a natural genius.....think of the possibilities if she was "schooled"! the article stated that formal schooling would have stifiled her. the "unschooling" kids sometimes don't read untill age 10, or whenever they are ready. even my "schooled" children get "unschooling" lessons everyday...lets count the blue cars, lets pick 10 oranges at the super market, etc.... i think home schooled children are very intelligent, and i love the concept that they are shieled from the bad influences of conventional schools....but these sucessful children have dedicated parents! my neighbor gives a bad name to "unschooling". her 7 year old son still does not know his ABC's...which my "schooled" 7 year old daughter taught him. i always thought if you home schooled, or "unschooled" your children, you needed a computer, my neighbors do not have one. my neighbor's children are always outside (unattended) at all hours...where's the education here? i even asked this mother how her kids were learning...she said they learn by playing with legos...WTF??? her 4 year old still breast feeds (walks right up to her and unbuttons her shirt!) and wears diapers! sorry about the long rant! i think conventional school works out best in my situation due to my lack of patience, work and school. i really wish my kids could have been home schooled to protect them from negative influences. "unschooling"...not for my family!

Answer 10

This sounds like being a bad/lazy parent to me.