Do you spank your child(ren)? Why or why not?

Question

Personally I think spanking is a great thing..do you agree? Do you disagree? Why or why not?

Alot of people are saying that what they see is what they learn and if you spank then they'll think it's okay to hit. Spanking is something that should be explained. If you just go around spanking your child when they do something wrong, then yes they will learn that it's okay to hit. But if you spank them and go back later and tell them why you did it and explain to them that mom and dad are the only ones who are aloud to spank, then they should learn that hitting is not okay. Personally, I think parents who just use time out and taking away priveledges are either just too lazy or afraid to explain their child's punishment to them after they get it. What kind of punishment is time out anyway? They sit on the couch and in chairs all the time, what difference is having them sit somewhere for punishment going to make?

Answer 1

I have 2 girls 5 and 7 they get spanked sometimes. Mainly for disobedience. It is a rare occassion and only after it is made clear to them why. I lift their dresses and deliver a spanking that ins not easily forgotten.

Spankings should be severe enough the child does not easily forget and rare enough so that the parent does.

Answer 2

I have three children, they are 10, 6 and 3. Yes, I do spank all 3 of them. There is a huge difference between spanking and abuse. Spanking, when used correctly, is a very effective and loving parental tool. Abuse is never justified under any circumstances. If my children are misbehaving they are given a warning.."Stop that or I will spank you"...if they choose to correct the behavior then it ends there. If not, then I spank them. Depending on the type of misbehavior I usually try a milder punishment first, such as corner time or being sent to their room, along with a warning that repeated misbehavior will result in a spanking. There are a few exceptions. Blatant disrespect, lying or anything potentially dangerous result in an immediate spanking, no warnings or second chances. I do not use anything other than my hand anywhere other than on the child's bottom and I have never left a bruise. It is discipline, not abuse.

I do not agree that spanking teaches a child violence, or causes them to resent/fear the parent. I was spanked (a lot) as a child and I do not resent my parents nor am I a violent person.

Answer 3

I do use spanking as a last resort. And I make sure not to spank my children when I am angry. As far as time outs go. I use them for my three younger children (my 11 yr old requires almost no correction whatsoever). My two year old gets put in her crib until she calms down (I use timeouts for her tantrums). She knows the difference between timeout time and naptime or bedtime and feels the concept of the correction. Otherwise I redirect her if she's getting into something she shouldn't be getting into. My 5 & 7 year olds have time outs too but not on a cushy chair or couch. They get to stand at attention in a corner with just their nose touching the wall. At the same time they have to come up with a sufficient explanation of why their behavior was wrong, what they should have done instead and what they will do to make sure it doesn't occur again. When my older children receive a spanking they have been warned one time and know that upon repeating the behavior they will be receiving a spanking. It's not a pleasant experience and I make sure it hurts, but when I'm trying to teach my children self-control I feel it's important to maintain my own self-control in these situations.

Answer 4

As long as the children are young enough to need spankings. Between the ages of 4 and 8 sounds about right. Also make sure they get plenty of warning so they can stop the bad behavior before getting spanked.

Answer 5

"Personally, I think parents who just use time out and taking away priveledges are either just too lazy or afraid to explain their child's punishment to them after they get it."

I personally do not understand the logic used here. If you're not being physical with your child to get a point across, mere magic doesn't make them stand in time-out or make them feel bad when something is taken away from them. Parents who don't spank have to do MORE talking then those who result to being physical with their kids. Afterall, if you're angry enough to even want to slightly harm your kid, I'm sure you don't explain things as you are laying down your law to them... but only after the fact. Spanking becomes impulsive and that little feeling in the pit of your stomach (as my father put it to me) is guilt. It's there for a reason.

Answer 6

Occassionally, yes, I have. My daughter is 9 and I have spanked (pops on the bottom) her maybe 4-5 times. But for BIG things..for instance when she was 4 she actually ran into the street w/o looking after something. I have been very fortunate that when I explain my expectations, she listens and undertands them. I have used in the past "time out" but it gets old after about 6 years old. Now I use a combo of early bedtime or giving up a privilege.

Answer 7

Yes we do. My husband and I agree there is a difference in spanking and in abuse. I threatened to spank my daughter when she was about 4 for running away from me in a store and this lady told me she would report me for child abuse. I told her my name addy,phone #, and said go ahead. My children are not abused. She told me spanking was "ungodly" I told her the bible says "spare the rod and spoil the child" she quickly shut up and people around me applauded. I have talked to a friend of ours who works for CPS and he told me it is legal to spank as long as it is on the bottom and with your hand anywhere or anything else is abuse. My children are older 8 and 9 and aren't spanked often now but if they need it, they will be spanked when nothing else works or if they do something to put themselves or others in danger.

Answer 8

My children get spanked but VERY rarely. There is a huge difference between spanking and abusing. And they are not abused!!!
When they are acting up and nothing else helps. Or when they have put themselves in danger then yes they do get spanked.

Answer 9

Spanking is one thing Being cruel is another- when a child is spanked it is mostly to hurt their feelings-to keep them out of danger-abuse is something that should not happen either verbally or Physically

Answer 10

Yes, how else will they learn? My best friend tried not to spank. after trying every thing else including "time out" and a "naughty chair", she realized nothing got through like a spanking. I was entertained to watch her try different things. I always spanked my kids when they got out of line. Maybe that helped her realize they wouldn't die, just cry a little.


my kids are 2 and 7, hers are 2 and 8 months. her 2 year old thought time out was qiuet play time.