How do I improve my ability to take risks and meet potential mates? Since 2001, I have been afraid to go out and try to meet new people. I feel lonely, since I do not have a husband or a boyfriend. I have difficulty connecting with people I have met, partly, because I am afraid I will be hurt and not just emotionally.
How do I put this behind me and take risks so I can meet new friends, and eventually a boyfriend who could turn into a husband?
I am afraid of online dating services, but I haven't ruled them out.
2006-06-19
05:57:39
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8 answers
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asked by
Differently-abled musician
2
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Singles & Dating
Five years you have been afraid to engage with the singles world. You mentioned you have been hurt emotionally and imply you may have been physically hurt. I think that is where you need to concentrate. Resolve that issue. Decide if you can resolve it yourself or not. Many people use therapy to help get past a particularly difficult issue. Physical abuse is typically that kind of difficult issue.
Once your fear issue is resolved enough that you feel moderately comfortable engaging with people you don't know. Go and find people in your daily life you meet people at the grocery store, bank, cleaners. Talk to them say Hi. Find a church with an active singles ministry. Check on eHarmony.
I haven't used any of the dating sites on the web, but back when I was single I was one of the first to try a Video dating service. I found many people had issues with it and it didn't work, but the personality matching they do with the extensive questionnaires today sound like a good way to find someone.
First, heal yourself, you want your someone to fall for a person that is more healed than you sound now. If someone falls for you now, they may only want to help fix you and may not be able to accept you when you heal your wounds.
2006-06-19 06:00:27
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answer #1
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answered by Ken C. 6
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Good question. I know it's hard and you will always protect that heart of yours and with good reason. You got to take it one day at a time. When you go out make the most of that night or day out. If you want to meet someone you got to put yourself out there and start talking to men and flirting again. If you don't act interested they won't be interested and maybe that means you're still not ready. It's all up to you. Maybe this weekend go out with some friends. Maybe get yourself a new outfit to feel good in, new shoes, new makeup and go out. When you feel good it shows and attacts others to want to be near you and with you.
You got to take some risk in life and yes you will be hurt, but you already know what hurt feels like. This coming Friday put on some Rolling Stones have a glass of Champagne, put on your new outfit and hit the town and hit it big.
Badda Bing Badda Bang.
2006-06-19 06:11:27
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answer #2
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answered by You got Moxie 2
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I have lots of experience on meeting new people. I have to travel with my work all the time and fin it hard to meet people, so I started to join social groups. I currently reside in FL and have joined several professional networking groups that host happy hours through out the community I live in. The same groups will arrange charity events and sporting teams like co-ed softball and co-ed book groups. This is a very non-intimidating way to meet people of the opposite sex that have the same interests that you do. Try checking the web for young professional groups in your area or the site~ (http://www.ypcommons.org/connect/) Also, I have tried speed dating. That is a great way to meet a lot of people quickly. Check it out at (http://www.8minutedating.com/) (http://www.pre-dating.com/)
Good luck
Good luck!
2006-06-19 06:08:52
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answer #3
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answered by Chicago S 2
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2016-12-08 22:43:30
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answer #4
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answered by hirschfeld 4
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Go to where good people are.
In the Beginning God created heavens and earth.
God gives you air to breathe and sunshine to enjoy.
God gives you water to drink and food to eat.
God gives you a wonderful body and sound mind, to live.
God loves you, and you are precious to Him.
Son of God died on the Cross to save us from condemnation.
Jesus’ love is boundless and everlasting.
We have the hope of Heaven through Jesus.
Life therefore has fantastic and glorious future!
2006-06-19 06:02:13
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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Just take it slow and easy,Get to know the guy first before dating him,Then if it works out then fine, if not then go on to the next one.Remember the Internet has so many freaks and crazies.be careful.
2006-06-19 06:00:35
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answer #6
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answered by Male Sicilian Trauma Nurse 6
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Get over your fear.
Whoever said love was painless?
Your pangs are only in transition
Be the beautiful butterfly
Come out of your cocoon
Life is too short
2006-06-19 06:09:04
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answer #7
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answered by karen-morrison7@sbcglobal.net 1
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You are going to have to get rid of your fear first of all! It is also good to learn to enjoy being by yourself-try being around others in groups.
2006-06-19 06:02:29
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answer #8
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answered by wancarol 4
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